Final Prep for Reconciliation Parent Guide 1 During this retreat, you will take your child to see the parish reconciliation room. (Some parishes use a confessional instead; in this case be sure your child is familiar with it.) You may also use this picture to explain the reconciliation room to them. It will be well lit, have two chairs, a cross, a Bible, and other items. The priest and penitent sit together and talk. The penitent may remain anonymous if he or she wishes. 2 Tell them that they will be in the reconciliation room with the priest. Assure them that you will be there that day with them, just outside the room. Explain that when they go to confession, they do not have to tell you what sins they are telling the priest. 3 Use these notes to explain what the priest will say to them and how to begin. He will welcome them warmly and greet them with kindness. 4 It helps a great deal if you share with your child what it s like for you when you go to Confession. If you have not been to the Sacrament of Reconciliation lately, this might be a good time for you to return and make a good Confession. Your example will be worth more than all the preparation in the world! 5 Explain that the name Reconciliation and Confession and Penance refer to the same Sacrament. Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 1
1 It is important for your child to know what the Bible is and why it is so important to Christians. Take the Bible on your table and open it to the Gospel of Mark, chapter 1, verses 14-15. Explain that when they go to Confession, the priest may start with a short reading from Scripture. Read the section from Mark as an example. 2 Explain to your child that it is necessary to prepare to celebrate Reconciliation or Confession. Review with them the examination of conscience which is on the next page of your notes. Your child does not have a copy of this. Go through each element to make sure your child fully understands how sin affects us and why we confess them. 3 Invite them to write a prayer on page 3 which asks God for help. Help them fill in the blanks in this prayer. Your child may have some ideas about the blanks to fill in, but here is our list of words: your child s name your parish humble confession honest loving forgiving name Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 2
An Examination of Conscience for Children using The Lord s Prayer. Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed by Thy name. Do I think about God every day? Do I say my prayers? Do I pay attention and participate at Mass? Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Am I kind to others? Do I do what Jesus wants me to do? Do I share with others? Am I helpful to my family? Do I show respect to my teachers and classmates? Give us this day our daily bread Do I remember to say thank you? Am I sometimes greedy? Do I appreciate the good things I have in my life? Do I think of ways to help those who have no food? Do I take things that don't belong to me? Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. Do I say I m sorry when I have been wrong? Do I forgive and forget when someone does something bad to me? Do I help solve problems between my friends or do I cause more trouble? Do I say bad things about people who have hurt me? Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil Do I play fairly in sports and games? Do I cheat in school? Do I tell the truth? Do I set a good example by my kindness? Do I let other kids tempt me to do things I know I shouldn't do? Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 3
1 In this lesson, your child will learn about what it means to say aloud the sins which he or she may have committed. You must assure your child that they can trust the priest to hear them and help them. Help your child shift from the examination of conscience to a short list of ways they have sinned. Mention that the priest may help your child or may give some advice. Your child should listen to all this attentively. 2 Ask your child to look at this picture and tell you what he or she knows about priests. They are special people whom the Church chooses to be our leader in the parish. They lead the Mass and other prayers. They live a life of prayer and ministry. 4 In the Sacrament of Reconciliation, priests represent both Christ and the Church community. Explain to your child that God forgives them and the priest helps them to know that and celebrate it. We need to go through the act of telling our sins and receiving absolution because otherwise (1) we cannot realize fully how God forgives us, (2) we become immune to admitting our sins, (3) we need to stop and start over now and then, (4) by doing this, God gives us a special grace or power to improve our lives, (5) we feel lighter and freer after we confess. 5 Help your child memorize this Act of Contrition. Explain that it will be used just before the priest absolves our sins. If your parish prefers it, use this official version of the Act of Contrition: My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against You whom I should love above all things. I firmly intend, with Your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for us. In His name, my God, have mercy. Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 4
1 Explain to your child that after he or she confesses his or her sins, and after the priest has talked with them and given them advice, the next thing which happens is that the priest asks them to do a penance. Explain that penance means making up for what we did wrong. 2 When we are truly sorry for our sins, we promise not to do them again. The penance helps us be strong. Our Father Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen. Hail Mary Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. Explain that the penance will most likely be special prayers the priest will ask us to say. (Make sure your child knows the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be by heart!) Explain that sometimes the penance might be an action related to our sins. If we confess selfishness, for example, the priest may ask us to share more. Glory Be Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen. Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 5
1 Throughout this final prep lesson, we have been learning the Act of Contrition. Explain to your child that during the Sacrament of Reconciliation, he or she will be invited to say this prayer aloud. 2 Tell your child he or she should wait until the priest has given them their penance. They will be invited to say this prayer. 3 Remind your child that the most important moment of the celebration is next, when the priest gives them absolution. Make sure they understand this term. Tell your child that the priest may place his hand over their head or on their forehead during the absolution. 4 Remind your child that after the absolution is pronounced, the priest will pray one more prayer, bless them, and send them on their way. Your child should thank Father for this good confession. 5 Rehearse your child in all of the prayers and steps for this sacrament. Help them review their Examination of Conscience. 6 As the parent or parents of a child in this process, we urge you to celebrate this sacrament yourself, as a model for your child. Your child will only learn what they see you doing. Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 6
1 This is the final review of the steps for the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Help your child put these steps into the correct order. We have given two clues: step #2 and #4. There are seven steps altogether. Here is the correct order: 1. The welcome 2. Bible reading 3. Confess sins 4. Advice from the priest 5. Penance & Act of Contrition 6. Absolution 7. Go in peace 2 The best way to prepare your child in these final days before the Sacrament is to role play the steps with them. You play the role of the priest and ask your child to do the rest. Use the lesson pages from each session to help you. 3 At home this week, work with your child to help them write an invitation to have Jesus come to visit your house. Of course, Jesus does visit your house every week. Growing Up Catholic 2014 Final prep handout for parents 7