X Rated : 7 Proven Ways To Get Rid Of Porn

Transcription

1 X Rated : 7 Proven Ways To Get Rid Of Porn 1

2 X-Rated Copyright 2017 by CampSalam.com You may publish excerpts from this ebook as long as they are accompanied by a link back to 2

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4 Contents Preface You Have Evidently Messed Up Walk Away Know Your Triggers Make It Harder For Yourself Forgive Yourself! Set Goals. Then Get Ready To Fail Seek Help About Camp Salam Message From Camp Salam

5 Preface Not to judge you or anything, but you are here because either you or someone you know has the problem of The Secret Sin. You could be considered a Good practicing Muslim but when it comes to controlling this hidden act, you have constantly failed. Congratulations you are not alone and you have actually taken a step towards making a change by downloading this ebook. If I have learned anything in my few years of researching the subject, the solution to dealing with porn (in general) varies greatly from person to person. Factors such as personality, experience, and the level of connection (or addiction, if you will - more on this later) one has with porn makes the difference in the methodology that must be used to heal said individual. Sadly, there is no one-shot silver bullet that can kill the monster that porn is. It is sort of like the millions of people trying to become fit by purchasing that one video or getting on that one diet As we all know, they often fail. With all that said, however, there are some basic principles that are universal when trying to clean the dirt of porn and masturbation out of your life altogether... Here they are: 5

6 1. You have evidently messed up. Simply knowing that you messed up is the first step. You cannot heal a problem if you do not recognize that it is a problem. Study after study and many success stories have all indicated that real change only occurs when the change becomes a must. Nobody ever became better because they wanted to change. Real change is fueled by the realization that you HAVE to change. Thus, this act must become unacceptable in your mind completely. The pain, disgust, immorality, horror, and defeat you feel must be felt on an exponential level. Only then will you be moved to make some radical changes. Islamic perspective: True Taubah (repentance) is not when we simply ask Allah for forgiveness but when we turn away from the bad act completely. The intention to stop altogether must be there, even if one fails again and again and again. 6

7 2. Walk away. Do not sit. Do not stand. Certainly do not lie down. Walk away, even though your body will want you to sit there. Relapsing is like quicksand - if you sit there and do nothing, you will sink in. You must move. You have to. Methods that have worked for others after relapsing: i) Clean up. This means yourself and your environment. ii) Compensate. You did something bad; now follow it with something good. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, Be conscious of Allah wherever you are. Follow the bad deed with a good one to erase it, and engage others with beautiful character. iii) Get in touch with your Spirit. When we indulge in porn, we surrender to our lower self. If we were to let our desires lead us, we would certainly be destroyed. An old Native American fable states, There are two wolves inside of us - one good and one bad. And both of them want to eat. The one you feed is the one that will live. Avoid everything that may call you to haram (impermissible) things or remind you of them, if you are sincere and really want to repent. Al-Ghazzaali (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If the first inward thought is not warded off, it will generate a desire, then the desire will generate a wish, and the wish will generate an intention, and the intention will generate the action, and the action will result in ruin and divine wrath. So evil must be cut off at its root, which is when it is simply a thought that crosses the mind, from which all the other things follow on. (Ihyaa Uloom al-deen, 6/17). By focusing on our Spirit, we feed our higher self. The higher self becomes stronger. This, by default, leads to our lower self becoming weaker. So feed the spirit by praying, meditating, reading the Holy Quran, being in the company of good people, having intellectual thoughts and conversations, and taking on challenges. 7

8 3. Know your triggers. This varies from person to person greatly but some are universal. Most men agree that stopping screen time was their BIGGEST step to recovering. Triggers are things that lead you to porn very subtly. Very few guys who want to recover walk into a room with the intention of watching porn. No! Instead most have admitted to drifting slowly towards porn step by step. Example: You decide to watch a movie one night by yourself. You are an active recoverer. Now the movie is great but this one scene with sexuality or a woman being provocative occurs (wasn t even close to nudity) and it changes your mindset and focus just a bit. This is a trigger. Most men usually get the idea of porn from seemingly harmless sources. Allah (may he be exalted) says in the Noblest of all Books, O children of Adam, let not Satan tempt you as he removed your parents [Adam and Hawwa (eve)] from Paradise, stripping them of their clothing to show them their private parts. Surely, he sees you, he and his tribe, from where you do not see them. Surely, we have made the devil s allies to those who do not believe. (Quran 7:27) When you are recovering, nothing is harmless. In the early stages avoid all media if possible. Again, occupy yourself with tasks and people. And remember, Satan is watching, waiting for you to slip. 8

9 4. Make it harder for yourself. This is common sense and usually what most guys think is the only answer. Remove the TV, computer, and phone from your private areas. Put a lock on your browser and forget the passcode. These things definitely help but certainly are not the simple solution. They should be done nonetheless. The more difficult it is for you to watch porn (or be close to your triggers), the less likely you are (combined with your focus on the higher self) of doing it. Fortunately, the lower self can be easily distracted and does not like to work hard. The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) also said: O young men, whoever among you can afford it, and whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him. Narrated by al-bukhaari (5065) and Muslim (1400). What we learn from this hadeeth is that fasting suppresses sexual desire. But that does not mean that you can put a worn-out shield with holes in it on your arm, and then expect it to protect you on the battlefield! Rather, we may say that you are taking it off, and thinking that you are still under its protection. One of the effects of fasting is that it weakens desire and reduces it, but there is no way you can achieve that result if you try in only one way to weaken it, but do not pursue the matter wholeheartedly to the end. Rather, you strengthen it again in other ways. You need to be patient with the remedy and put up with its bitterness, and strive to overcome your nafs (soul) all the way. Allah (may he be exalted) says in the Holy Quran, And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way. (Quran 17:32) He didn t say, don t do the act of unlawful sexual intercourse but commanded us don t approach it. He has created us and knows how we function and in the case of sexual intercourse, he knows that we won t be able to stop (or that it will be really difficult) when an opportunity approaches us to act on an indecency. So make it hard for yourself to be around anything that will cause you to commit the act of watching porn. 9

10 5. Forgive yourself! Seriously. As mentioned in step 1, you have to be the biggest critic of yourself and hate this act more than anyone else in your life. But yet, you also have to be your biggest fan and love yourself enough to know that this is not the end but the beginning. The great motivational speaker Zig Ziglar once said, If you do not think you deserve the things you do in life then you will do things that will prevent you from getting them. You have to know and believe that you deserve the life you have always wanted. This alone will serve as fuel. Porn is degrading. We know it, we feel it. But when you believe yourself to be on a mission to accomplish what you are here on this Earth for seldom will you let yourself surrender to fleeting destructive pleasures. Watching indecency and acting upon shameful acts is no more than a passing desire and transient pleasure, but what will be left is regret and remorse. One wishes that this sense of sorrow would be limited to this world and would end with our death, but it is regret that never dies; it will follow us to the grave, the gathering (on the Day of Resurrection) and the standing before the Judge. Why should we lose our Hereafter for something which, if we sought the help of Allah against it, asked Him to make us steadfast in keeping away from it, and strove to overcome our nafs (soul), we would overcome it by His grace? Food for thought: What if I told you that ALL men are addicted to porn. Studies have shown that more than 90% of young men today watch porn regularly! ( And I suspect that the other 10% are lying. Allah (may he be exalted) says in the Qur an, Allah wants to lighten for you (your difficulties), for mankind was created weak. (Quran 4:28) 10

11 The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said, I have not left behind me any fitnah (temptation) more harmful to men than women. (Narrated by al-bukhaari, 5096; Muslim, 2740.) Do not think for a second that this is only your problem. This is a problem for ALL men. I have yet to meet a man who, at some level, does not struggle with his desire for women. This is a struggle you must accept as one that will continue until you die. Satan, however, likes to convince us that we are above it and as we know, the moment you take your armor off - you get stabbed. 11

12 6. SET GOALS. Then get ready to fail. Studies have also shown ( that only about 3% of people achieve their dreams. These are the ones who write them, adjust their methodology, their philosophy, and then they fail their way to success. You have to know that you are the exception. When you fail, just remember that. Millions of men out there are failing but do not even realize it, but you do. And even more, you are doing something about it. "It does not matter how fast you go, as long as you keep going. Remember, at the end of your day, week, month, year, or life, it will not matter how many times you fell but how many times you got back up and kept going. 12

13 7. Seek help. Talk about it. Discuss it. Form circles. Groups of knowledge. Expand your horizons on the subject. Strive to find righteous friends, strive to perform all the prayers on time, and do a lot of naafil (voluntary) acts of worship. Avoid being alone and thinking about haraam things as much as possible. Always bear in mind that Allah is watching you, and that He is Most Noble and Generous, the One who conceals sins, may He be glorified. So beware of showing audacity in committing sin, lest Allah then expose your sins Try to exercise regularly and spend time in useful pursuits such as reading. Strive to find good friends who will help you to do good and will guide you to it. Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: The example of a good companion (friend) in comparison with a bad one is like that of one who sells musk and the blacksmith. From the first, you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell, while from the blacksmith you would either get burned or smell a bad scent. If you feel ashamed to let your brother see you committing this sin, then how can you think of Allaah as the least important of those who watch you? So be among those who give up sin, seek forgiveness, and repent. Beg Allaah frequently to purify your heart and protect your chastity, and to grant you refuge from the traps of the Shaytaan. The more you know, the more you will be empowered. Never think for a second that knowledge alone is the answer. And I hope this has been helpful in the least. And Allah, The Knower of All, knows best. Zain Syed 13

14 About Camp Salam Camp Salam is an organization whose mission is to bring a fun and active environment for families to get together and to empower them with strategies and tools for mastering and living life fully; everything from how to be motivated, change your mindset, being healthy and physically fit, being happy and productive, time management, cultivating relationships, spirituality, and much more! All amidst the fun of camp fires, fitness boot camps, educational activities, talent shows and meaningful relationships. We strive to bring awareness through our camps and family workshops to issues such as social media addiction, rapid growth of pornography, anxiety and depression, obesity and other such epidemics that are destroying families lives all around the globe. 14

15 Message from Camp Salam Thank you for reading! We really hope you enjoyed the book. If you enjoyed reading X-Rated - 7 Proven Steps to Get Rid of Porn & Regain Control of Your Life, we would appreciate it if you would help others enjoy this book too: Lending: This book is lending-enabled, so please, share it with a friend. Recommending: Please help other readers find this book by recommending it to friends, readers groups, and discussion boards. Direct them to so they can download it. CONNECT WITH US: As always, if you would like to get in touch with us, feel free to send us an at contact@campsalam.com Don t forget to visit Jazakallah Khair (May Allah reward you with good) Wasalam o alaikum (and peace be with you) Team Camp Salam 15