TESTIMONY OF MY LIFE AND MINISTRY

Transcription

1 petertan.net TESTIMONY OF MY LIFE AND MINISTRY This morning I am going to share about what God has been speaking to me. Let me share about my ministry here and my ministry to the body of Christ in this country. I am not called only to this church or to this country. God has shown me several things to do. This world is not my home. I am just going to do God s perfect will and then go home to be with God. In 1975 I was praying on the top of a flat together with several believers. I was already born again by that time and I had such a hunger for God for revival. I live only for that. I live to see the perfect will of God done. And I can t stand it when God s perfect will is not done. In 1975 we used to gather together with two or three Christians in the early hours of the morning. We used to come before God and pray and seek God s face as to what God wants to do and what God s plan is for our lives. Two of them were holding secular jobs and I was the only one partly doing a course and partly waiting for my school certificate results. So in 1975 it was about 4 am in the early hours of the morning. As I was praying God s presence came and surrounded me. It felt like God s presence just filled the whole place. I was on the rooftop of a four story flats. We used to gather on the rooftop to pray. I was planning not to serve the Lord. I had my own ambition. I planned to do other things in life. But when God s presence came that day I saw visions of souls dying and crying out for the Lord. I couldn t stand it any more. I said Lord if your Word is the truth and people without Jesus are doomed, then the most important work on earth is to save souls. I wept and cried for I don t know how long. It was then that I felt God said to leave everything that I have and to go into the ministry. So when the two brothers came, I told them what happened. They felt that was what God was dealing in my life. I didn t realize that He had a call on my life. That morning when I went back and very strangely God sent another brother to

2 visit me with just one message. He said the Lord had called me to obey Him. Of course I went to seek my pastor. I was a member of the Baptist church. I asked his counsel and he believed that the Lord had called me too. He made arrangements for me to go to the seminary. When I made my decision to go my parents disagreed. My father wanted to chase me out of the house. My mother came to know Christ but she could not accept the fact that I was going to give my life to the Lord. But I was determined to go. When they saw that I was determined they did not do anything to stop me. After that I applied to enter the seminary and I was accepted. I was only about 18 years plus at that time. I went into the seminary in January During the first year there I sought the Lord. I said, Lord I need your power, I need your grace and I need your help in the ministry. I didn t know the Lord very much at that time. In the middle of that year I was baptized in the Spirit without knowing that it was the baptism in the Spirit. I used to go on for long fasts. One day when I was fasting, the Lord began to fill me with His Spirit, which I didn t understand. I began to speak forth in another tongue. I didn t even know that it was a tongue. But subsequently I didn t follow up on that experience since I didn t understand the benefits of tongues. But I began to call on people to come for revival meetings. We started a prayer meeting in the seminary. One by one the students began to receive the baptism in the Spirit. During that time the faculty came to know it. I began to get more and more opposition. That was only the beginning that I was learning what persecution is like. And what it is like when you are doing the things of the Lord and people don t understand. And of course I pressed on but at the end of the three years I was given a letter that told me that I had to leave the seminary because I was a Charismatic. They told me, We don t want Charismatics here and you practice extreme Charismatic practices. So I packed up my bag. My only belonging was one bag and I came out. I couldn t go home because my parents would not understand that Christians could do that. I mean here was their son having a bright future but gave his life to the Lord. And because of some Charismatic practice he is suspended from the seminary. By the grace of God He opened a door and I remained in Penang, Malaysia in the Baptist Church. While I was there I continue on seeking the Lord. It was during that first year when I came out that the Lord showed me a vision of my spirit man. He showed how my spirit man was just malnourished. I want you to know that

3 intellectually I had good bible knowledge. My grades in seminary were always 90 marks and above. So the vision of my malnourished spirit man had nothing to do with bible knowledge. But bible knowledge and spiritual growth are two different things. God showed me that my spiritual life was dry, empty and malnourished. I found in that first year when I came out the Lord dealt with my spiritual life. I saw in a vision like a lot of demons that were facing me. I cannot even say just a few there were thousands of them. Here I was skinny and I was trying to walk through their midst going somewhere I don t know where. As I was trying to cross them I found a struggle the agony to move into the things of the spirit. When I came out from that vision I was devastated. I said Lord with so much theological training I am still not prepared. That was when the Lord told me to take one year where I read nothing but the Word of God. I took every promise from Genesis to Revelation personalize them and for about eight hours a day meditated and meditated and prayed in tongues and meditated and prayed in tongues and meditated. For one year I read nothing but the Word of God. I read no newspaper; I read no books not even Christian books. And I meditated on the Lord. About six months into that meditation the Lord began to teach about His gifts. How His word of knowledge operates. I began to feel what I call now the tangible anointing that I never felt before. I began to understand that was the gift of the Spirit working. At the end of that year the Lord dealt with me during that time I also had one of those long fasts. During one of those 40 days fasts while I was still in that First Baptist Church that I was in when I left the seminary, I was lying down about four something in the morning. That was one of the few times that I heard the Lord s audible voice. The Lord said I love you. This is all He said. I heard a sweet soft gentle voice of the Lord said three little words I love you. That voice woke me up. I was towards the end of my fast. And when I heard His voice I wept. I got up and I cried. I said, God I thank you for your love. I thank you that you love me so much. I never experienced such great love. But it was during that fast that the Lord began to show me that I had to leave the Baptist Church and go independent. After that experience I left for an independent ministry. We set up a ministry in Penang. There was only about seven of us together. We prayed and we organized a ministry together. In the early days of the ministry we hardly had much money. There were many times when you believe God for things and they didn t manifest

4 yet. I say this to encourage those of you who are in the ministry, especially if you exercise faith and it doesn t just come immediately. There were a lot of lessons in faith. I remember that some of those times I didn t even have enough to eat. I remember the time when I accepted an invitation to preach in one of the Lutheran churches. I had just enough money to take a bus there and no money to return. But from the early days I have always said that I will never ask people for any help. I will just trust the Lord. If I die I die if I live I live the Lord should take care of me. So I went and preach and there was no offering taken. I walked all the way to where I stayed. Every step I walked I told myself the Word is true I will believe the Word. The Lord is true His Word never fail. I don t care what I feel. I don t care what I see. The Word is still true and I hold on to it. That was how we came up in the early days. I remember there were times we didn t have enough to eat. I remember some brothers would come to me and say lets go out for lunch. I was not sure whether they were paying or not. So I was afraid I would be asked to pay. Even if we were to go Dutch I didn t have enough money even to pay for my own food. So that was the time when I didn t accept. And the Lord provides a miraculous means. Sometime I was renting a room with one brother and that was the day before I was invited for lunch and I was not sure if they would pay for me. Because sometimes they don t pay and everyone pay their own. I said no. And on my diary I remember I had it on record. I was invited out but I was not sure whether it was going to be paid so I said no. Then I wrote down Lord I still trust You. Your Word is true. Those were the early days. Miraculously one of those brothers was walking on the road and he found a gold ring and he came back and said the Lord says to sell it and the money is yours. There are many ways that the Lord provides. So that was how we came out in the ministry. I remember the sacrifices when we made to print the magazines. We printed only three issues. When we did the work of the Lord it meant sacrifice. When we printed those magazines we put our food money inside. All of us were prepared to go without food in order to bring the Word of God out. So we went through lean times. In 1979 the Lord opened a door for us to minister in Kuala Lumpur. That was when I came down and ministered in the Full Gospel Businessmen Fellowship. By that time the Lord had taught me about the gifts. The Lord has established in our lives part of the Word of God. We just only know one message that the Word of

5 God is true no matter what circumstances we go through. We can trust the Word. Live and die by the Word. Of course we also understood certain things about the gifts of the Spirit by that time. I remember in the early days I had just turned 21. When they saw the ministry and began to bring me around to different meetings and places, there came opposition again. At that time I don t know why that there was so much persecution but now I understand it is part of the training of the Lord. There came again the opposition from people who would not believe in the Word of Faith. If you remember in 1980 and 1981 the Word of Faith was controversial. Anyone who links up with that was called a cult in those days. We stood on faith and we kept preaching the Word and many doors started closing because of opposition to the Word of Faith. By that time I knew what persecution was like. My parents persecuted me when I wanted to follow the Lord. I was persecuted in the seminary. I was persecuted in the Baptist Churches. I began to have persecution among Pentecostal Churches. When we turned to the Lord there was no place to go. So in 1981 we just said, Lets take a break. We went for three months to Tulsa, Oklahoma and to Houston, Texas. While we were in Houston the Lord showed in a vision to one of the people there to confirm in our hearts what to do. The Lord showed that person that we were to go back and start a church. So when we returned we turn the work in Penang into a church and the one in Kuala Lumpur into a church. We started organizing it like a church. So we continue on and then finally the Word grew. Then it came to a place where there was a difference in organization. See there are three types of problems we always have in Christianity, personal, doctrinal or structural. We came to a place where I have nothing personally against anybody but the structure wanted to change. I said I cannot conform to any structure that I don t feel is in the Word of God. I don t want to be an employee and I am not somebody s employee. I want to serve and do God s work that s my desire. So in 1986 we started this church. Of course there were all kind of problems. People cannot see very clearly what the issue was. The issue is structural but of course personality comes in and other areas will come in. It was just a matter of differences. I want to show that I have nothing against any body. I am still in good relationship with the other churches. Then as we started this church we had to leave the other work.

6 When I went on a three-day full fast (without food and water) in the early days of my ministry, on the third day of the fast I had a dream-like vision. I was not conscious whether I was awake or asleep. I was taken to a place where there were two mountains. Between the mountains was a valley and a huge building, which I understood represented the Church. Only the pillars were ready; the walls and other things were not up yet. The pillars were so big that you could drive three cars on them. High up on the building were some people I recognized. There were John Sung, Watchman Nee and a few other people, some I recognised, some I didn't. They had all gone to be with the Lord and they were beckoning to me to go and join them. I didn't know what it was, but in the spirit it was like I was going to them. And then I got out of this visitation. At that time I knew that the two mountains represented the first and second coming. The pillars represented the pillars of prayer that build the Church, the foundation. And these were men of God who had built some of those things. But a few years ago, God said to me: "Son, do you understand what that vision means?" I said: "No, Lord." The Lord said" "I have called you to continue the work which Watchman Nee, John Sung and the others have done. I have put an anointing on your life to do that work and I'm calling you to finish that which they have started." When I saw that, I wept. Of course, like everyone else, I said: "Lord, I will do Your will, I just want to do Your will. I don't seek for fame, I don't seek for fortune and I don't seek for anything. I just want to do Your will and then go home. And then some time after that, Watchman Nee came in two dreams and talked with me and imparted something. Later on, when the Lord was teaching me about the anointing, I met Kathryn Khulman in the spirit world and she said some things to me and imparted something. As I progressed spiritually, I met different people and I said: "Lord, I don't understand these things theologically." But through time the Lord began to show me: This is the communion of the saints that still goes on. Now, I didn't ask for it, I didn't pursue it. I was just seeking God and praying, meditating on the Word. I didn't seek to meet anyone of them at all. But the Lord showed me that there were some things in their lives and their spirits that they had harnessed and gathered and imparted into my life in some way that my mind doesn't

7 comprehend or understand. My father who went home to be with the Lord many years ago, came twice. The first time he came, he brought 10 pieces of a white substance that looked like a white pancake. He came and though he didn't say a word (it was like a thought transference), I knew that I must eat it. I ate it and when I woke up, I knew something had changed. It was just like Solomon, He had a dream and in the dream God told him: "Solomon, ask what you want." And he said: "God, I just want you to help me govern Your people. They are such a great people. Help me do Your will." That is what God loves. God was so pleased with Solomon, He said: "Because you didn't ask for the life of your enemies, I will not only give you wisdom, I will give you all the other things." And when he woke up, Solomon was a different man. In January 17, 1986 and when I was praying the Lord manifested Himself. One week before He manifest Himself the devil manifested. I was sitting in down in my sofa to pray. Towards my left there appeared a devilish looking person. It was not Satan himself but probably one of his warriors, wearing a white garment but very ugly looking face with huge ears and spots all over. He stared at me. I got up and stared at the demon back. That demon left when I rebuked him. Then I sat down and kept worshiping the Lord. Then the next week the Lord appeared. When the Lord appeared I thought that He was coming to answer my prayers. I have a list of prayers. One of my prayers is, Lord I want a trip to heaven, not to go home yet. But I just want to see heaven and come back. When He appeared I thought that He came to answer my prayers. So I stretched forth my hands and said, Lord lets go. The Lord smiled and said, It is not time yet. Its not time yet means I know the Lord is going to answer that prayer one day. Then instead the Lord began to talk to me about other things. He was like a bright and shining light. He is more glorious than the sun. He is brighter than the sun. As He spoke to me it seems that the words pierced right into my heart. It seems that in those few hours it was like 10 years of education. There is something the Lord told me that has not come to pass yet. There were other things to a certain extend have come to pass. The Lord began to teach and show me about the anointing of the Holy Spirit. He pointed out to me what my call is and what I am supposed to do in this life. He

8 told me exactly what kind of ministry I was supposed to stand in. That s why I boldly stand in what the Lord told me to do. I couldn t care to please men. He told me the offices that I was to function in. He told me the gifts that I was to operate. He says there are certain signs that I was to operate. There are three, one that has come to pass and only two that have not come to pass. He says if I am faithful then He will cause the other two signs to pass. After the Lord spoke and shared His words and He went off I could not sleep that whole day. That night I was thinking about the Lord s word and I just couldn t sleep. So I just spend the whole day worshiping God. The next morning between two to three in the morning I was in my bedroom and I was still praying. Then came this bright light like a ball of fire into the room. It came towards me and it stopped. When it stopped I felt the presence of God. I said, Lord I know it is you. The moment I said that the ball of light slowly came forward and touched my forehead. When that ball of light touched my forehead I felt that I was caught up into space. I was looking down on the planet earth. The planet earth looked so small and hanging in space. I felt what God felt for the world. As I was looking at the world I felt God s heart beat for the world. I felt like God was in me and I was in God and He was looking through my eyes and He was holding the world through my hands. I felt His love for this world. I can never rest until the perfect will of God is done. What the bible says, For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son I felt His love going towards the world. It felt that if one sparrow were to fall down to the earth and die you feel that pain. Anything that is not part of God s plan, anything that is of disease or sickness or pain or suffering or decay or destruction that God never planned for Adam and Eve and for us, it was causing pain to God s heart. When one bird falls to the ground you could feel a sharp pain going through you. I felt what felt like in the book of Genesis 6 it says God was grieved by the sins of men. I began to understand that when God looks at this planet earth right now until this planet earth is brought to the perfection of Jesus, the heart of God is aching for this planet earth. Until every man, every woman, every creature, every animal and all creation is doing God s perfect will God s heart is aching. It is causing pain to Him more than you realize. All the sufferings of men and all the imperfection of men were being felt. The feeling was so intense and so agonizing you feel you could die of love. I cried and said, Lord I didn t realize that Your love

9 hurts you. Because of Your great love You are hurting for the imperfection of this planet earth. That changed my view of God. That put urgency in my life about the coming of the Lord. The Lord did tell me before He left that He is coming soon. He called me to have a part in His last days move. But this intensity of His love cannot be described. Its just like sometimes you feel compassion for someone who is sick. You multiply it a billion times you will know the great love that God feels for His people. That was what God was dealing in my life. I cannot rest day and night until the will of God is done on this planet earth. He has done something in my heart, that I cannot rest until the will of God is done. As long as the church of God is not perfected on the planet earth God is still sensing that pain. And all I have to do is to remember that experience and know that God wants this world to be doing His will. So that the Lord s Prayer Our Father who are in heaven, holy be Your Name, Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as is done in heaven. So unless God s will is done in our life God suffers more than us. I believe there are many things that God is dealing in our lives even today. God has spoken to some of you in some ways. He has challenged your life to live your life the way He wants you to live. I want you to know that there is no such thing as a stationary meeting or staying stationary in the Lord. We all have to keep moving. We all have to keep doing God s will in our life. We go on from one will completion to the next will until we complete all the total plan of His written will in our life. As I close I just want to urge each one of you to meditate on this fact in I Cor. 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love is no jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood. So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

10 I just want to let you know that if you don t walk in God s love and you don t walk in God s perfect will, you are not only hurting others you are hurting God. When I came out from that experience I told the Lord, Lord I never knew that if Your people walk in Your permissive will how much it really hurts You. I never realize the pain you go through when we don t walk in Your perfect will. Lord please help me to bring others to do God s perfect will. I began to understand that if I could help each one of you to do God s perfect will God would have less pain and less grief to bear on this planet earth. May we all seek to do God s perfect will in our life. God has called me here for a purpose. God has called each one of you here for a purpose. We all need to come together in the Lord to do God s perfect will. Put aside all our differences. Put aside all our personality. Put aside all our background. Put aside all our prestige. Put aside all our ego. Put aside our pride. Seek to do God s will that God may be glorified in our lives. That He may have His perfect work in this place. God is training each one of you here. There is going to be a multiplication in your spiritual lives and in the life of the church here like we have never seen before. There is going to be a multiplication in your financial life and in your experience with the Lord like you have never seen before. But before God brings that to pass John 15 will have to take place. In John 15:1-3 I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch of mine that bears no fruit, He takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit He prunes that it may bear more fruit. You are already made clean by the word which I have spoken to you. Notice in verse it says that every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away. Then He continue and every branch that bears fruit. My beloved brethren you all have borne fruit. And He says every branch that bears fruit He prunes. Why must He prune? That it may bear more fruit. So there will be cycles of pruning. When you have borne fruit for God there will be a pruning. During the pruning it may hurt a bit. But then there will be more fruit that comes forth. Be sensitive to the cycles of God. God is doing a pruning. Once God finishes His pruning you will realize it has been good since more fruit comes forth in your life. That s the pruning process that He is putting each one of you through. But for this past two years all over in the body of Christ in this planet earth the Holy Spirit has been bearing a sickle. He has been pruning and pruning the church of Jesus Christ. But the pruning process is coming to an end. This year it has come to an end and the church of Jesus Christ all over the world will move into a new

11 dimension of bearing fruit that it has not borne before. It s a new dimension that the Lord speaks about. The Lord has pruned so that we may bear more fruit, so that your life may increase. So that you will expand your spirit, expand in your soul: expand in all that you do that you set your hand onto. There is a pruning process that has taken place. As Jesus coming draws near, no matter what gifts you function in, no matter how wonderful your ministry has been or where you stand in the five fold ministry remember the greatest is love. It is more important that you have love then that you have just done something. If you did something without love the reward is not as great. But if you love you will end up doing the right things in the Lord. So remember the words of the Lord Jesus Christ. These are the words of our Master. In the gospel of John 13:34 A new commandment I give to you that you love one another even as I have loved you. The most important command the Lord gives to us is to love one another. Throughout the whole body of Christ this is the commandment that should have been the most prominent but it is not. These are the words of Jesus. Jesus who died for us, Jesus who gave His life for us, Jesus whose hands were pierced for us. Jesus whose back bore the stripes for us. Jesus whose head was pierced with crown of thorns. Jesus Christ died suffered the pains of death; rose from the dead. Before He said physically to His disciples; before He left He says a new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you. So He is telling us to love each other in His love. And that is what God wants to do in His body. So I exhort each one of you; I encourage each one of you to realize that Jesus is pouring His love in His church. He is causing His love to abound that we will have a greater appreciation for each other and a greater love for each other. This is just the beginning of fruit bearing time. If you do something without love your fruit will not last. The Lord Jesus said in the gospel of John that this is will glorify my Father, that you bear much fruit. Jn.15:8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be my disciples. The Lord Jesus wants us to bear much fruit for Him. If you do something without the love of God your fruit does not last. He desires that our fruit remains; that our fruit last. When you do something in God s love then only the fruit of your labor will last for eternity. For God to exalt whatever you do for Him it is important that you have the same flow of love. This Word of God is born in love. The story of the Bible began with God s love for man. The story of the

12 church of Jesus Christ will end in Jesus love pouring upon the church so much that He pour His gifts upon the church; that He brought the church to Himself. The story of this planet earth will end in showing how God in His great love has finally paid the price and brought to fruition all the fullness of His plan on this planet earth to the fullness of His love.