1 The key to Peace is to release the anger from within your physical body, and embrace the freedom that is your truth. Allow yourself to feel everything. Feel it to the utmost without covering it up. Release the Feeling and let it go.
2 Anger Management 101 The Physical Body When I talk to clients or people about getting in touch with their anger, it amazes me how many people say to me, I am fine, I don't have any anger, or they say my talk about anger, or my book, would help a person that they know, bypassing themselves completely (like they don't get angry). They want to fix and give it to some other person instead of getting in contact with their own anger. Everybody has anger, and everybody could use anger management 101. Everybody has their own truth to discover, and the best way to do that is to uncover the anger. If you are claiming any illness in your body, it is an opportunity to discover if and where you are suppressing any emotion (anger) in your body that wants to be acknowledged and released. A perfect opportunity for release of a feeling of powerlessness came when I rented a room in my house to a man. He passed all the background checks, he had a very positive outlook about his life, and I felt really good about renting a room to him. He seemed very conscious and very positive. After he moved in though, everything changed very fast and nothing he said seemed to be true. My roommate and I were both feeling bullied by him, which brought up a feeling of not feeling safe in my own house. When I asked him to move out, he said I couldn t make him. This brought up a feeling of helplessness and powerlessness for me, and it made me very, very upset, along with feeling enraged inside. Because I know how this process works, I trusted that after I released the energy, I would be able to come back and approach him from an empowered place of not feeling victimized. The energy shifted, and shortly thereafter he moved out. This type of bullying behavior can and does show up in the workplace, and it happens to both men and women. I know this man who was working for a small business, the boss of which was a very angry man who was continuously projecting his anger onto his employees. This type of working environment is very hostile, and yet the boss was always wondering why his turnover was so high, and why he could not retain his employees. Although the person who was on the receiving end of this bullying was also a man, he felt scared, stuck, and that his survival was at stake. I wonder how many people feel stuck in an environment where they don't feel supported? After many conversations about what he was feeling, followed by releasing, the employee claimed more of his power by making a choice to leave this environment with the conscious awareness of the lesson, and he is now free to create and attract a more loving environment that is more in alignment with his truth.
3 When we get angry or upset, the event, person, or situation that is triggering us is acting as a catalyst to release a feeling that is no longer serving you. This awareness requires courage, and it takes willingness to look and feel what this is about for you, release, and let go. Because what pisses me off, what makes me angry has nothing to do with you, so don't take it personally that you are the catalyst activating my fire. Because of the experience, I can use that fire responsibly to create change. I accept and I know this is serving me to claim my power -- not by force, but through conscious awareness. Love your anger -- your fire -- get conscious with it and let it burn away all that is not the truth within you. Your anger is your gold, and is never about the other person -- it is your anger. When anger gets activated within us, it really is a blessing for release. It is an opportunity to have the release within the body that, prior to the activation, laid dormant within. It is an opportunity to discover what is underneath that anger, as well as an opportunity to love ourselves through the fire. When we get triggered, we have come together to mirror and to hold space for each other to combine our feelings with our consciousness, transmuting matter into mystical consciousness. [Thank you for mirroring my shadow so beautifully -- it hurts so good.] Our shadow sides are things we don't want to see about ourselves, and our core fear in life mirrors this to us. By bringing our conscious awareness to our body and using our body as a tool for transformation, we can be brought back to our truth. We gain physical, mental, and emotional empowerment, plus radiant wellbeing, when we take responsibility and cultivate relationship harmony within our body. We are blessed with youthfulness and life. We have the open invitation, if we choose to use it, to get intimate with our body, curious in the dialog, and interested in the messages that the body is ready to share with you -- waiting for you to acknowledge the intelligence and wisdom of the body. Your body is always in communication with you, so use it as your best friend that has your back, and you it. Become your body's cheerleader -- it is your spiritual master, signaling you to engage in the most sensational intimate relationship, as well as the home housing your spirit. Remember, we have been unconscious and separate from the intelligence that the body holds. The societal conditioning and programming was to suppress and ignore our issues, which is one reason why there is so much anger and depression. We have found many possible forms of band-aids in the form of addictions to cover up what our body is trying to communicate with us. The body knows that it is being ignored and it is expressing symptoms to get your attention. The body is doing and
4 behaving exactly what it is designed to do -- to be of service to you, and when we decide to honor the messages that our body has for us, then healing can take place on all levels. To prevent the body from getting sick (storing emotions) you need to be open and willing to feel all your feelings, and to not suppress or store any of your feelings or emotions in the body. By being conscious and open to discover whatever messages your body is trying to communicate with you, with the positive intent to decode the message, the body will continuously mirror to you your thoughts and your emotions. Your body remembers all of the past trauma, wounds, and pain it has ever experienced. It remembers everything, and it's our job to love our body and get conscious with the messages it lovingly is communicating to us -- taking our power back. Our body is the vehicle which, in combination with our emotions, and our mind, is our dream machine the tool that is helping you to make your dreams come true. The most important thing to remember is you are here to feel good, and feeling good is the fastest way to manifest your desires. If you are suppressing issues, anger, emotions, or depression, this will keep you from creating a reality that is in alignment with your truth. The emotion of anger is sometimes felt as resentment, sarcasm, frustration, argumentativeness, annoyance, aggressiveness, jealousy, or boiling feelings. It's really very simple when we look at all the reasons why we would be angry. For men, sometimes this seems to be more challenging than for Women. Men have always been taught to be strong, and they have not been encouraged to think or feel with their heart. On some level they have been made to believe that it is a weakness. When I ask men how they feel, I usually get an answer back from their head. Hold the space for each other to feel our feelings fully, to feel the anger, and let it move through. Don't be afraid of your anger -- it is energy in motion, and it's not bad, it's not wrong, and there is nothing wrong with you. Feel it --feel it all fully. Allow the feelings to come up and give voice to your feelings, then release the string and let go -- it will pass. I am so over the making nice part, or the cover up part; that passive-aggressive behavior turned inward is so unattractive, unhealthy, and so 70 s, it ages people. I am so over people projecting their anger onto others, as this too is such unattractive, bullying behavior. I am also over the judgments slinging back and forth, like a bunch of 3 year olds that don't know any better. This has been our conditioning and our training. This is what we where taught to do.
5 I am so over the part that says to hide it from the children, when the truth is, they are wired for the new way and they could be your bridge, they could be your trigger, they could be your space holder. They don't have all that suppression that you have, and they don't have an onion with layers of anger to peel. If the kids today can give blow jobs at the age of 10, they can be your space holder, holding you after you had your meltdown. This could be the flip-side. Anger turned inward and suppressed will turn into resentment, depression, sabotage, quick temper, lashing out at people, loneliness, isolation, fear, feeling paralyzed, powerless, weakness in the body, holding on tight, shallow breathing, and feelings of lack, limitation, and being victimized. Depression -- the best thing to do for someone who is depressed, be it a friend, family member, neighbor, or colleague, is reach out to them and get them really, really pissed off. When someone is depressed, they have given up -- they feel and are paralyzed from moving forward, and they are feeling lost and defeated. If you know someone who is depressed, go to them offer them the space, offer them your hand, and give them the opportunity to be heard and witnessed. Give them the opportunity to get good and pissed off -- to bring that energy from depression up into anger. Ask them what it is they are so depressed about, ask them what they are feeling, and let the anger burn that depression away. Sometimes we need someone to hold our hand until we can hold it for ourselves. Depression is the lowest of feelings, and people who are depressed, could use a hand, and a space. I have seen this work time and time again with clients and friends, including myself. When I feel powerless or feel depressed, it's time to get pissed and get that energy moving. By feeling our feelings and giving voice to our feelings, the need to judge anything falls away, just like the feelings do. Everything wants to be loved, and everything wants to be acknowledged. Anger, used positively as a tool by you, will give you energy, creative purpose, freedom, liberation, space, connection, unity, strength, abundance, health, harmony and well-being in the body, and is the best anti-aging cream on the market. Why? Because you are moving the energy, and now new light can move into those cells. You re not holding on tight, so there is a relaxed feeling, a receptive feeling. Be the compassionate witness for yourself and others. Bring your awareness to the suffering you are experiencing and allow yourself to be present to your pain, anger, and suffering without shying away. Let your life be opened by this experience, without resistance.
6 Step One The event happens and you get triggered. This could happen in the workplace, in your relationships, or in your environment. Whatever anyone is angry about is never ever about the person, situation or event. Bring the energy back to you and how you feel by being triggered, then start the dialog with, I feel. I feel angry right now, I feel upset, I feel. Go deeper and bring the feeling up to the surface. I feel like I don't matter, I feel like I am small, I feel like I am worthless, I feel lied to, I feel cheated, I feel betrayed, I feel I can t trust anymore, I feel powerless, I feel like I have tried everything and nothing works, I feel ashamed, I feel not good enough, I feel afraid to communicate, I feel it in my throat, I feel it in the pit of my stomach, I feel it in my heart, I don't feel loved, I don't feel valued, I don't feel appreciated, I don't feel heard, I don't feel honored, I don't feel safe, I feel disrespected -- these are old feelings that you are releasing now. Healthy ways to express your anger (fire): Go into your anger management room and let it out. Accept responsibility for your thoughts, actions, and feelings. Take ownership for your own anger. I accept, I choose to release, I feel mad as hell. What are you feeling angry about? I am choosing to let it all go. Scream out at the top of your lungs, or scream your head off! From the core of your solar plexus in the middle of your stomach, feel everything. Howl like a bitch in heat. Cry, cry, cry -- weep uncontrollably. Use the F-word as many times you possibly can, [I'm so f pissed off, are you kidding me]. Stomp up and down, or do a dance. Call a friend, ask for them to witness and hold the space -- do whatever you can do to get the fire out. Unhealthy 70's style ways to express your (fire): Suppressing the energy in the body. Projecting onto the other person or event. Acting like nothing is wrong. Taking drugs, or drinking your worries down. Unconsciously complaining or taking the victim role [they did this to me, poor me]. Going postal, hitting, or harming another. Shooting back, or taking revenge at the person that triggered you.
7 Step Two The beautiful blessing you can say (now that you have released these feelings): I choose love, I choose my empowerment here, I embrace all of me unconditionally. I choose my power, I claim my life, I choose being at peace, and I choose to forgive. If through the experience you released powerlessness, congratulations what a victory for you, and what a gift. Now replace this feeling with your truth, and make the following statements: I choose and claim my power here. I feel so very powerful. I am an empowered being. Next, take action grounding in a new and empowered way of being for you. You are releasing a feeling of powerlessness and claiming your truth. Nothing ever goes away until we feel it all all has to be felt and released. After you have had the opportunity to let your anger/emotion out, give yourself some space to really understand what the experience was about for you what the lesson was and what approach would you like to take now that you have released this energy. Have compassion for yourself and your trigger pusher. Because it hurts and is painful, you have to remember the person that triggers you is gifting you. Thanking them for triggering you and mirroring you (your shadow), is a wonderful gift. Offering them gratitude, compassion, and most of all consciousness, is the key to your liberation. Offering radical forgiveness to yourself and the person that you feel hurt by is your freedom. Thank them for helping YOU. The key is to know this, and to apply this awareness after you had taken the opportunity to get your anger out. Peace begins within is really taking radical responsibility for being the peace bringer yourself, and learning to release your fire (your anger) is one of the most loving peace acts you can bring to this planet. War is the extreme action of angry people, and even though we have war going on in the middle-east, or right here at home, the best thing you can do is bring yourself into harmony and peace within you, taking care of you, being that role model to others and be the peace you wish to see. Become a space holder for yourself, holding space for each other in the workplace and in your relationships.
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