Cape Cod Summer Scenes. Family Fun It Is Possible. Pastor David Pranga Colossians 3:12-14, July 24, 2016

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1 Cape Cod Summer Scenes Family Fun It Is Possible Pastor David Pranga Colossians 3:12-14, July 24, 2016 If you are joining with us this week, we are in a four part series called: Cape Cod Summer Scenes. Each of the past three weeks, we have been looking at what makes Cape Cod so special. How God is present in these activities. Now we are up to week 4. This is the most important week in my mind. I may be a little biased on this one. My favorite Cape Cod Summer Scene is the importance of Family Fun. As you know, there are so many great things about living and visiting Cape Cod. It is one of the reasons why many of you live here and why so many people come to visit. Many people come with their families to vacation. They came here when they were children and returned as adults. Visiting Cape Cod as a family is huge. It is something very special that makes summer great. When I think about summer as a child growing up, I have so many great memories. I love when my family would get together. It was always around July 4 weekend. For me it was a time to see my grandparents, play with my cousins, and hang out with my aunts and uncles. I want you think back to when you were a child or even as an adult. I have two questions for you. What do you remember most about your family? What made your family get together so special? Many of you have families that come to Cape Cod for family reunions. For me, I leave Cape Cod and travel to Wisconsin to see my family. Let me tell you, it is my favorite highlight of the entire year. I am blessed to have a great family. I love seeing my family. There is nothing better than reconnecting. This year was remarkable because everyone was able to come home during the same time. My brother came with his family from Atlanta, Georgia. I brought my family from Mass. My brother and sister came from different parts of Wisconsin. We all took a week off of work and bombarded my family house. I want you to imagine 24 people living under one roof for a week. Here is a picture of my entire family and my immediate family. I know what some of you are thinking, how big is this house (picture)? To my mom this was a dream come true. This was the best birthday gift you could give my mom. Having everyone come home for a week. To my dad, I think he enjoyed family but I think he enjoyed going to the grocery store, hardware store, and the day we went golfing to get away from the noise that 24 people can make. Let me ask you, if I told you that you would be spending a week with your family together, would your first thought be positive, would it be negative, or there is not a chance world that would ever happen? I want you to think back to the title Family Fun It is Possible Over the course of this week, I had time to focus on why I enjoy and love my family so much and why it so important.

2 1) FUN When I think of my family the first word that comes to my mind is FUN. For my family or at least for me Fun equates to playing GAMES. I come from a pretty competitive family. I really did not realize how competitive my family was until I met other families. My family definitely cares very much about winning! Maybe I should say, I care very much about winning. When my family is together we play lots of games. They range from outside games like corn hole, croquet, volleyball, and basketball. Then we had the inside games like: Ticket to Ride, Sequence, Uno, Canton, Dictionary, Polish Hearts, and many more. Though the all-time favorite card game is Euchre at the Pranga s household. As a family we have fun together by playing games together. When you think about your family. What are the fun things you enjoy doing together? For many people living on the Cape it may be going to the beach and swimming, it may be mini-golf, it may be going for ice cream or going to the drive-in movie theater or biking on the rail trail. We all enjoy having fun as a family. Why is having fun together so important to families? Family fun is an important part of building a strong family identity. When families have fun together, it builds a bond that can last a life time. Relationship with each other become stronger when we are having fun together. Families need time to together. Time spent talking, playing, joking, and laughing is healthy for all families. When families are having fun together it brings joy and happiness to the family. For those of you watching your health, having fun together also relieves stress. Another benefit of fun is that it lifts the mood of everyone involved. You have an attitude of joy when playing games or having fun together. Lastly, traditions are often developed in times of having fun together. Those traditions help define each family. The first word about families is about having fun together. 2) Appreciation The second thing that comes to my mind when talking about family is Appreciation. Every time we get together as a family, I have a better appreciation for my parents and the many things they taught us. I know my parents love us very much. When I think about the week we spent together, there were two things that I appreciated about my parents. The first thing I appreciate about my parents is their Work Ethic My parents both grew up on farms. They have an incredible work ethic. They both enjoy working and staying busy. So it came to no surprise to hear that Dad already made plans for us on July 4. Most families look at the 4th of July as a holiday. Maybe you sleep in, take it easy, and go to a parade. Not my dad. On 4 th of July, my dad had a log splitter delivered to the house at 6:30 a.m. My dad decided we would get started at 7 a.m. because he did not want to wake the neighborhood as we split wood. My brothers and siblings were are out there splitting wood. Eventually, when the children got up they came out to help as well. All morning we split wood. (pictures) If you knew my dad, this would not come to a surprise at all.

3 To my dad that is just part of life. It was time for the family to be together and help out and get some work done. The second thing I appreciate about my parents is Food. Food always was something you enjoyed in our household! Whether it is cooking on the grill or making something in the kitchen or munchies. Food is just of those things that brings family together. Image cooking for 24 people every day for a meal? I know what some of you moms and grandma s are thinking right now? I cannot believe you made your mom cook for all those meals. Of course we did not. Each night one of my siblings or I was responsible for the dinner meal. Everything turned out great! Plus, it gave mom a break to enjoy the family. What do you appreciate about your family? We all have things we should appreciate about our family. For each family it will be different. Every family has different things they appreciate about each other. When I think about appreciation, I believe the most important things is our attitude. It is so easy to focus on the negative. Instead, we need to focus on the positive. I want you to think back when my dad got the log splitter on July 4. I could have dwelled on the negative. I could have complain about it being a holiday or my vacation. Instead we all focused on the positive. Everyone pitch in and helped. It was done in a few hours. In every family there are things we need to appreciate about each other. In my family, working together and cooking the food are two of many things I appreciate about my parents. 3) Memories The third thing I love about my family being together is the shared memories and stories. Every family has memories and stories that you share about, just about every time you get together. I love sitting around the table or around the campfire late at night listening and sharing stories. There is something cool about your parents and siblings sharing stories about the days of our youth and when we were children. Like all families, we have stories that we retell every year. These stories make us laugh. They make us cry. There are some embarrassing stories and pictures as well. These memories and stories help us and remind us of what family is all about. They remind us of the good times and sad times that our family shared together. These memories bring joy to our life. They bring laugher to our children. Memories and stories, help tell a story of who we are. Who we become over time. I think you can all agree that memories and stories play a huge part into healthy families. See when I think about Cape Cod Summer Scenes and subject of family. For me, I think about all good stuff about family: I think about Fun we have together. I think about the things I appreciate about my parents. I enjoy reliving the memories and stories from my childhood. Those are some great things about families. Now let me change gears for a few minutes. I also realize that not everyone has a wonderful family. For many of us in this room we come from families where there are relational issues, family unrest, or even conflict between family members? Can anybody relate to relational issues? Is there anyone that has family unrest? Anybody have siblings that don t always get along. Many of us do.

4 There is some family unrest between people in my family as well. We love each other, but there are times where we can really get on each other s nerves. I just realize that most families have some relational issues. I would like to spend some time talking about these relational issues. If you have your Bibles, please turn it to Colossians 3: Therefore, as God s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. NIV 4) I need to forgive The fourth word that comes to my mind dealing with family is the phrase: I need to forgive. Most families have relationship issues. We are all sinful. We make mistakes that can be hurtful. When you grow up with each other, there are things that will bother us more about each other. Often times we let it get the best of us. Question: How do we forgive the people in our family that we struggle with? A. The first thing I need to remind myself is my identity. I have to remind myself that my identity is with Jesus Christ. I am a Christian. Being a Christian is different than the world. The world and culture tells us it is all about me. I can do whatever I want. I can say whatever I want. It does not matter what other people think. Being a Christian is different. As a Christian, my actions and my words matter to God. I need to remind myself that I am representing Jesus to my family. God cares how I handle my mouth. God cares how I treat the people in my family. God also understands the trials we face with family members. I really believe that God has put us into those families and those relationships to help us become more Christ-like. Our identity matters to God. B. The second thing I have to do and what I want encourage you to do is. PRAY. Family relationships are difficult. Family relationships are hard. Family relationships are challenging. Family relationships are just plain messy. When I go into a difficult situation, I pray about it before I go. I pray about it when I get there. I say prayers all during the day. These prayers can be out loud but they can also be in my mind. When we go to God in prayer. We are inviting God to help us. I might say a prayer to God to help me control my temper. God, how can I say things in a more loving way. It might be that I asking to help me show love and compassion. Or I ask God, how I can frame a questions, so the person will hear it the right way. I have just found prayer to be powerful. I know that I cannot do it on my own but I need help. But knowing that God is there to help me gives me a lot of peace.

5 C. Paul goes on and says, 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. What does it mean to bear with each other? It simply means we need to put up with or to overlook an offense. Instead of getting upset with something small, there are times we just need to let it pass. We need to move on. We should not make a big deal about the issue. Will there be things family members might say to you that can be hurtful? Yes. Can some of the things a person says to us be upsetting? Yes. Just as people at work might say something insensitive, we need to give patience with our family members. What Paul is saying to us as Christians is that there are times where it does not matter. We need to bear with each other and we need to overlook the offense that is done to us. When we overlook the offense, we are actually showing love in this situation. D. But it is the last part of the verse that that is the toughest. We are to forgive as the Lord has forgiven you. It interesting that God tells us twice that we need to forgive. I think God does this because we don t get it. I believe God put that in there because he is telling us (1) we are to forgive our family members. Yes, they hurt us. But we need to forgive them. That is our responsibility. It is not our responsibility to inflict harm or to even the score. We may want to do it. But it is not our responsibility. That is God s responsibility, if he chooses. Our responsibility is to show love and to forgive as we want God to forgive us of our sins. God cares about our attitude. We need to have a humble attitude. I know it is hard. Do we want God to forgive us of our sins? Of course we do. Then we have to take God at his word and forgive our family members of their sins. The times they have hurt us. The times they let us down. The times they did not show up to help. Why do we forgive? We forgive because of what God has done for us. God accepted us. God died on the cross for us. God love us. What God wants in return. We are called to forgive. We are called to forgive our family members who have hurt us. I could go on and on about this but we need to move along. 5) Love The fifth thing I think about family is the word LOVE. Going back to Colossians 3:12-14

6 Paul tells us in Colossians 3:12. We are to clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. (Skip to verse 14) And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity Why does God tell us to clothe ourselves with these virtues: compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience? What is God trying to teach us? What is it that God wants us to do? I believe God is having us look at our attitude towards the person we are having difficulty with. It is a choice how we treat our family. It is a choice to be nice and to show love the person. When we put on these virtues of compassion, kindness, gentleness, and patience in your relationships with others. We are showing love and respect to them. I think of 1 John 4:7 it says, Let us love one another, for love comes from God. God wants us to love each other. God wants us to love our family members. Even the difficult ones. Is it hard to do? Yes! Why would God want us to do it? Why would God want us to practice compassion, kindness, gentleness, and patience with our family members? God knows if we make the choice with our attitude to put on love towards one another; if we show compassion, kindness, gentleness, and patience with the people that we struggle with, the relationship will be better. It won t fix everything. But it will be better. We need to ask God to help us to put on love because there are times where we don t want to. I know at times it is tough. I know it may be uncomfortable in some relationships. Especially when you feel a wrong has been done. I realize it is easier not to. This is where we are different than the world. The world tells us an eye for an eye. Jesus tells us to love one another as I have loved you. We are called to love each other. It is who we are. We are called Christians and they will know it by our love! 6) You are All Children of God The last great thing about family You are All Children of God. Everyone in this room is part of God s family, which is the church. God family is the men, the women, and children that make up the church. Some of us have come from very difficult home and family lives. You may not have family close by or because of hurts or abuse you don t have an option of being with certain family members any more. What I want to remind you today is that as Christians - You are All children of God. Story: I remember moving out to the East coast when my kids were 5, 3, and 2. Christy was expecting 4th child at the time. I was going through the interview at this church in Mass. I was asked countless times about why I would move our family away from the Midwest. Away from grandparents and the support system that was there. Away from family, why would I do it? My response was the church is also part of my family. I have always looked at the church as family. My blood family may be 1,000 miles away. But there are people and families in the church that help me out. They can take the place of blood family.

7 That is great thing about the church. I see it here at BBC all the time. I see young families being helped out by other young families. I see older adults helping families. I see seniors helping other seniors in the church. I really see an incredible amount of love that people show each other. That is one great thing about our church. The church and the members in it. The church is family of God to so many people. Is the church perfect at it? No. But it is something that we strive for at BBC. I just think it is great that when you become a believer; you are a child of God. You have a Heavenly Father who loves you perfectly. He also provides the church to be family for you. We as a church can be family to each other. I know we are out of time: Wrap up & Summary: When I think of Family Fun It is Possible. I want you to think of things we talked about. F Fun (Games) A Appreciation (Hard Work and Good Food) M Memory (Stories) I I need to forgive (Identity, Prayer, Overlook, Forgiveness) L Love (It is a choice) Y You are All Children of God (Church We are part of God s Family)