Theresa Driediger Mental Health Wildwood Church Nov. 1, 2015 Good morning. I struggled with depression in my teenage years and early twenties.

Transcription

1 Theresa Driediger Mental Health Wildwood Church Nov. 1, 2015 Good morning. I struggled with depression in my teenage years and early twenties. There was a particular psalm that really spoke to me. Psalm O Lord, you have searched me and known me. 2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from far away. 3 You search out my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. 4 Even before a word is on my tongue, O Lord, you know it completely. 5 You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is so high that I cannot attain it. 7 Where can I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there. 9 If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea, 10 even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast. 11 If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me,

2 and the light around me become night, 12 even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is as bright as the day, for darkness is as light to you. 13 For it was you who formed my inward parts; you knit me together in my mother s womb. 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; that I know very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes beheld my unformed substance. In your book were written all the days that were formed for me, when none of them as yet existed. 17 How weighty to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 I try to count them they are more than the sand; I come to the end I am still with you. 19 O that you would kill the wicked, O God, and that the bloodthirsty would depart from me 20 those who speak of you maliciously, and lift themselves up against you for evil!

3 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O Lord? And do I not loathe those who rise up against you? 22 I hate them with perfect hatred; I count them my enemies. 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my thoughts. 24 See if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. What is it about being known? Why is there such a yearning to have someone know us. I suspect it comes from early in our existence when an infants only experience is whether a care giver knows what we need and gives it to us. Carl Thompson, A psychiatrist who wrote in the Anatomy of the Soul, We as human beings seek to know things and believe this knowledge will solve all our problems. Our knowledge grows daily. However, what we really need is to be known. Who knows us. Our best friend, our partner in life, maybe our parents. When I m talking to people about their love relationships or broken relationships they say but he knows me best, how can I live without him. In the initial romantic meeting with a person what happens? Talk, talk talk until it feels like there is a spiritual bond. I am known by this person he/ she gets me. Now I am not alone. O Lord you have searched me and known me. I am a psychologist. I have worked in the field of Mental Health for 28 years. My practice is wide and varied. I have worked in interval house with battered women and children, in addictions outpatient treatment, On Reserve in 8 different First Nations communities as a community mental health therapist. When I was in Bible School, I became aware that of all the gifts of the Spirit, the gift of Encouragement was what I was given. So I have set out in life to encourage others. For the past few weeks you have been talking about Mental Health. Mental Illness is not something you can see. The torment is internal and hidden from view. That

4 doesn t mean we shouldn t be talking about it and seeking to provide relief for those who bear it. I am glad Wildwood is seeking to break the silence. I have a little object lesson to help illustrate what it is like. Why do some people suffer more than others. This is my cup. It is a model of my nervous system. When my mother bore me in her womb, things happened to her these ended up in my system. [water poured into the cup] Then perhaps she had difficulty with my birth. [more water into the cup] Then perhaps I fell down the stairs when I was 3. [more water] Then in elementary school I was bullied. [more water] Or my parents had a divorce. [more water] Then when I was a teenager lots happens when we are teenagers. [lots more water] Perhaps I m in car accident or I have a serious illness. [more water] Then I have a bad breakup. [more water] Perhaps I come to a point where I can no longer discharge the energy from all these big and little traumas. [water spilling over the rim] My nervous system becomes dysregulated. My cup is full. I m no longer going to fall sleep well or I may have trouble staying asleep. I m eating more or less than usual. Maybe I m being quite irritable or I am tearful all the time. Maybe I have no motivation and I m not interested in the things I used to be. These are all signs of what we call depression. Possibly I feel breathless at times, or I start to shake for no reason. Maybe I am scared to do my normal activities or my heart beats rapidly for no discernable reason. This is anxiety. For both depression and anxiety, maybe we are short of the body s neurotransmitter Serotonin, because we ve had to deal with a bunch of things and there just isn t enough to regulate our emotions. Search me, Oh God and know my heart;

5 Try me and know my anxious thoughts. When someone comes to see me, it is usually because things have become unmanageable in their lives. They begin to tell me what is distressing them. They will talk for a while. I already know that as someone talks about the bad stuff, they will begin to feel it in their bodies. Our memories are encoded with all the feelings and sensations that go with that memory. After a time I will interrupt, because the person is becoming more and more activated. I might say, I want to hear the story but I think you are starting to feel like too much. Maybe, I can ask what you like to do to comfort yourself, or something you used to do that you enjoyed. As they recount something good, they may notice they are feeling a little better. This is the principal behind the therapy that I do now. If we think about a bad thing we will feel it in our bodies remember it with all the sensations involved. On the other hand, if we think about a good thing we will also remember it with all the good sensations involved. In the therapy that I do, there is a movement from high activation bad memory, to calming discharge and back again. This helps to reintroduce healthy regulation into someone s dysregulated system. If I ascend to heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there. This is the normal way of healing. As an example, think about when someone dies and we have a funeral. There is high activation and grieving at times. The grief comes in waves. You can observe it during the service, at the cemetery, at the visitation afterwards. There are tears, and then someone will tell a story of the person who has passed. There will be laughter in the hall. If you watch, this happens repeatedly throughout the day. It is this oscillation between grief and loss and calmness and laughter that begins the process of returning to a healthy state. You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. Returning to my cup. I add something life keeps happening. I slosh in some difficult events, my mother is ill and in the hospital, my daughter has a bike crash, The bank calls in a loan, I get audited by Revenue Canada, we have to deal with a forest fire and Oh my, my cup is quite full. But then I have good talk with my friend,

6 go for a massage, meditate, have a SRT session with a colleague, a good nights sleep and some of that cup has been discharged. I am a believer in the counselling profession. These are people you can tell your inmost secrets to. You can leave them there in the office. We know that 50% of therapeutic gain comes from the relationship you form with your therapist. The other parts may have to do with the modality of therapy. I suggest to people that you go see someone. Give them a session or 2. If you feel safe and known, then it is a good thing. If you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, then try someone else. Keep trying until you find the right person. We in this province, have the first publicly funded mental health system in Canada. There are lots of fine therapists there. If it doesn t work, or there is too long a wait time, find someone in the private system. A few sessions are about as much as a nice flat screen TV, so your mental health is worth it. There are a few mental illnesses that are permanent and seem to be genetic. One is schizophrenia. It develops in late teenage and early twenties, sometimes later. A person with schizophrenia hears things and sees things that are not there. Treatment often requires a hospital stay and appropriate anti-psychotic medications until they are stabilized. Psychosis is a frightening and traumatic experience. With appropriate support, people with schizophrenia can have a productive life. They may have episodic flare ups of their symptoms which require return to hospital and adjustment in their medication. I enjoy doing therapy with people with schizophrenia because often there is extensive trauma in their lives. If we can empty their cups a bit, they have fewer recurrences and are more stable. There are some brain training programs that target the parts of their brains that become less used and it can help them be more able to study or learn new things that they need to fulfill their goals in life. Bi-polar disorder is another mental illness that seems to require medical intervention and medication to help them stabilize. There is a periodic cycling between depression and mania. Some are mostly depressed with few manic episodes. Others are have mania with few depressive episodes. There is difficulty helping them into treatment because there is often lack of awareness about their mania they simply feel great and like to stay up all night creating or accomplishing something. They are often not aware of their behavior and it can be very hard on

7 their loved ones. Often they are not diagnosed until there is an extreme manic episode that brings them in conflict with the law or a serious depression where they are hospitalized. It is often difficult for folks with bi-polar disorder to stay on their medication because it flattens the euphoria of the mania. It may take a number of interventions before someone with bi-polar disorder actually believes that they need medication. The tendency is to stop taking it when they feel well, which in time leads to another episode. Addictions are also mental illnesses. Anyone can become addicted to a substance or an activity if you use enough of it. Particularly if it becomes part of your way of managing stress or activation. After a while your dopamine receptors get involved and you gotta have it. Most treatment programs involved a period of enforced abstinence which helps your brain learn to do without. In my experience, abstinence and support groups to help manage activation or stress in other ways are the most successful. O Lord you have searched me and known me. How do we help people with mental health issues in our congregation. We are known by God, but we need to be known by others. As with all relationships it takes two. We need to reach out to those who are hurting in our midst. People need to allow themselves to be known. It takes two. You may need to let someone know in your congregation that you are struggling with a mental health issue. Often when we have the language. My cup is really full today. Would you pray for me? To ask, would you like to talk about it? The freedom to say, No I just need to be here today. I ll sit back here and listen to the service. That s fine. The comfort to simply be present in the body of believers, but not have to interact closely. People are not islands, we are social creatures. From the time we are born, other nervous systems are required to help us regulate. This does not change for adults. Some people need to talk. Sometimes they overwhelm their listeners ability to listen. We can say things that let them know we have heard, but I need to go and do something else right now. I can check on you later. Some people have poor boundaries and we can model good ones. Can I meet you after the service to talk about that. It sounds very important, and I can talk to you later.

8 Having a regular meeting with those who are suffering is an important ministry. No you may not be a counsellor, but you can listen. Simply being a calm grounded person. As you think What do I say? say nothing, feel your chair and nod your head. They will begin to regulate with your calmness. I tell my clients to hang out with friends who make you feel calm. Don t hang out with the ones who wire you up. I heard a British Theologian a couple of years ago speak of a Theology of Time. He said Jesus did his ministry at a walking pace -3 miles an hour. Folks with Mental Illness need our time more than anything. We need to slow down to meet them and allow our bodies to do the amazing task of helping them regulate. Nobody comforts an infant quickly. It takes time. Take a breath, ground yourself and then sit down with someone or go for a walk. The rhythmic bi-lateral movement of our bodies while walking, opens up the corpus collosum, that part of the brain that communicates between the two hemispheres and usually brings new thoughts and calming discharge to the troubled soul. I think we need to realize that most of us are travelling at a tremendous speed down life s highway and we need to drop out of warp speed to stop and listen. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. Some people s brains are travelling at a higher warp speed than ours. Those with Attention Deficit Disorder. We need to be patient with their need to move and the wonderful variety of their thoughts. We may need to have wiggle cushions available to help them make it through a church service. For the anxious person, trying to get their life back on track. Could you go with them to the bank, to an interview? Use your body to help them regulate their nervous system. We really do need each other. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You.

9 Thank you for allowing me to come and share my thoughts with you this Sunday morning.