Halloween 29: The Lazarus Odgen Museum benefiting Project Lazarus ~ New Orleans ~ Photos by Tony Leggio, Rip Naquin Halloween 29:

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1 Halloween 29: The Lazarus Odgen Museum benefiting Project Lazarus ~ New Orleans ~ Photos by Tony Leggio, Rip Naquin Halloween 29: House of Blues; Champions Cruise aboard Riverboat Natchez ~ Photos by Frankie Fierce, Tony Leggio, Paul Melancon 16 The Official Mag: AmbushMag.COM Nov , 2012 Official ficial Gay Mardi di Gras Guide GayMardiGras.COM

2 GayEasterParade.COM GayNewOrleans.COM SouthernDecadence.COM Nov. 6-19, 2012 The Official Mag: AmbushMag.COM 17

3 pensacola paparazzi Halloween in the Streets ~ New Orleans Emerald City ~ Pensacola, Florida ~ Photos by Lauren Mitchell 18 The Official Mag: AmbushMag.COM Nov , 2012 Official ficial Gay Mardi di Gras Guide GayMardiGras.COM

4 GayEasterParade.COM GayNewOrleans.COM SouthernDecadence.COM Nov. 6-19, 2012 The Official Mag: AmbushMag.COM 19

5 under the gaydar a community within communities by Tony Leggio ledgemgp@gmail.com Photo by: Larry Graham, GrahamStudioOne.COM by The Rev. Bill Terry, Rector St. Anna s Episcopal Church fr.bill@stannanola.org Bartender of the Month Bartenders in this city are probably some of the hardest working folks around. They deal with huge crowds year round as well as an array of diverse customers, some very intoxicated. So when they are off, the last thing they usually want to do is think about work. But it is always uplifting to see someone who works these long hours and Bartender of the Month Jake Good Friends Bar real estate Avoiding First Time Home Buyer Mistakes There are several mistakes that first time home buyers make that are easily avoided. The idea is to not be impulsive or succumb to wishful thinking. Even though a home may seem like a dream house it could, in reality, be a real nightmare if you are not carefully considering everything that entails purchasing the house in detail. Before you buy be sure to check out the neighborhood thoroughly. Remember that there are real estate agents in the business of selling you a home however they can, and if that means telling you that you are about to live in a gay-friendly neighborhood that actually is not that friendly at all, then they may ~ intentionally or not, do their job and get you into a home. Yet another mistake that many first home buyers make is assuming that their credit is good before they make an offer on a home. They discover way too late that they cannot go through with buying the house because their credit is not good enough and the entire deal falls through. We strongly recommend that you get prequalified or pre-approved for a mortgage before you even start shopping for a house. This prevents you from wasting your own and everybody else s time later in the game. Home sellers will not even consider entertaining an offer unless you are at a minimum pre-qualified, and your gay realtor gives back to the community in their spare time. I have a special place in my heart for the next bartender of the month for November, since he was one of my first bunny boys at the Bunnies in the Big Easy event I do during Easter weekend with Ms. Rona Conners. He is none other than the loveable Jake at Good Friends. Jake has a smile that lights up the bar and a warm personality to match. He normally works the upstairs bar at Good Friends, but sometimes you get lucky and he is downstairs to greet you. There are so many traits of Jake that makes him a good bartender. He had mad skills at preparing a drink; all the while keeping the customer engaged in good conversation. People enjoy sitting and visiting with him and that is exactly what a good bar owner should want. The more people like the bartender, the more they will stay and drink at their establishment. Jake is an expert at all drinks, but his martinis are to die for, and no one looks sexier moving that shaker back and forth than he does. It is quite an orgasmic experience. I do not even want to go into his whipped cream drinks. All kidding aside, Jake is just one of those sweet, nonassuming guys who goes out of his way to [continued on 22] should require it before he or she even puts you in their car to look at homes. Your real estate agent should be able to refer you to reputable mortgage lenders, or speak with your own local financial institution ~ avoid on-line companies that are not familiar with your specific market. The desire to live in a certain layout or particular neighborhood or in an adored housing style can also cause you to be blind to some of the flaws of the home. Are you really prepared to live with low water pressure for years, that bathroom you have to sit sideways on the toilet in, very old major appliances that might break down at any minute, or replacing that clay tile roof? Make sure that you have the contingency fees in order that will help you pay for things if these break down. This is especially true if you want to buy a historic home, which we happen to love. Another error is to skimp when in comes to arranging different types of inspections on the property that is to be bought. Make sure that you get all of the inspections that you can afford as that can save you a lot of money in repairs down the line. In addition to the standard home inspection, we recommend a sewer scope, asking for a roof inspection and certificate, a furnace inspection and certificate, and depending on the results of your home inspection, specialists to review items of concern. Always demand licensed/insured contractors for all repairs and replacements necessary, with receipts and warranties at closing. Blind Bartimeaeus When shopping for a mortgage broker many first time buyers just go with the broker that throws them the lowest figure, low figures will change once the company feels they have hooked you, beware. Go with a referral from a trusted source, your gay realtor who closes dozens of deals every year, or your own bank. It is also a mistake to take out what is called a sub-prime loan. This is a very expensive mortgage with a super-high interest rate. It might be offered to you if your credit rating is not so hot. Keep in mind that as desirable as it may be to have a bit of equity, that making an expensive deal may not be worth it in the end because you will end up paying thousands more than you would have if you have simply cleaned up your credit rating and bought a home at a later date. Don t panic about missing the market or missing the low rates, do your homework and be assured of the single best investment you may every make. Author Jeff Hammerberg is the Founding CEO of Irecently received a letter from a man who lives in anguish. In part his letter said that he did not feel that God was in any way blessing him. Rather that God was punishing him. Words like suicide surfaced in the letter. It was profoundly disturbing. He, as many of you may have guessed, was a man discovering he was/is gay. Perhaps his cultural setting is such that being gay is not only despised but to be eradicated. Perhaps his cultural setting is one that finds perversion in certain personhoods. He, in his words, tried to have people pray over him to extinguish his orientation but to no avail. So in misery and self pity and no small degree of anguish he reached out to me. Perhaps he had read one of these articles. Perhaps he had visited a website who knows how he found us but find us he did. How does one respond to self-loathing? How does one respond to threats of suicide? How does one begin to open a door to a person found in this state of mind and spirit? First, take it seriously. Do not trivialize it, do not brush it off, do not say in sweeping terms, Oh you re OK get over it. No, take it seriously. Take the whole person seriously. Not just the suicide notion but the location, the self loathing, the miss-directed angst about God. It should all be taken seriously because it is all the fuel of self loathing and acute self loathing and sense of worthlessness can lead and will lead to self inflicted harm in some fashion. Take it seriously. Self loathing and marginalization are certainly nothing new. I suppose in some ways by finding these words in Ambush I am preaching to the choir. In visioning my own faith context the focus of Jesus is precisely the marginalized standing in compassion and solidarity with them over and against those that would oppress, discourage, and abuse the seemingly disempowered. The rallying cry of this 1 st century Messiah is, walk your faith has healed you, see your faith has healed you to the faithless and hypocrites, sell all that you have and follow me. Just last Sunday the appointed scripture lesson from the Gospel of Mark told the story of blind Bartimeaeus a beggar who when hearing the crowd surrounding Jesus approach he threw off his cloak (the symbol of poverty and self loathing) and ran to Jesus for healing. Those in authority tried to stop him but the Messiah called him close with these simple words, What do you want me to do for you? Jesus over and against The Law, Tradition, Culture, and prejudice called Bartimeaeus. Fix this image in your mind and fix this image in heat and fix this image in your very spirit for it is in this image that we find the true spirit, the true faith, the true teaching of Jesus the Son of Man. Take it seriously. The point is that my letter writer does not need to be fixed but embraced by the lover of the marginalized. It is no small wonder that the Bartimeaeus story precedes the hypocrisy of the Triumphal entry of Jesus into Jerusalem where just days later he would be scandalously crucified. Seeing Bartimeaeus follow him. Take it seriously. I have replied to my letter writer. I have assured him that as a creation of God he is a friend of Jesus just as he is. He may need some help in understanding that he is not what his milieu says he should be. He may need a great deal of gentleness and care to tentatively move toward the historic, authentic, compassionate lover of souls Jesus, but that can come in time. If you are reading this, my friend, you are not alone nor is your experience unique. If you are reading this, my friend, there is a place for you in community that is safe and that will love you for who you ARE not who you are not. If you are reading this, my friend, there is a place in heaven for you and on earth as well. You may be blessed but cannot see for your own self loathing. You may be wonderfully adorned with gifts but cannot access them because self hatred is the most powerful force of darkness. If you are reading this, my friend, fear not a faith that embraces and gathers in it does not cast out. When I read The Good Book who is cast out: demons, power brokers, arrogant and haughty, and those who place self above others; he went to the Temple which he called my Father s house and cast out, drove out those who defiled the holiness that is the very nature of God. They defiled by utter disregard for humanity. If you read this, my friend, reach out to us, your community. Begin an authentic life of discovery that leads to being happy, joyous, and free. Cast off your cloak of self loathing and run and demand that the Son of Man set you free. Next Deadline: Tuesda uesday, Nov. 13th Call The Official Mag: AmbushMag.COM Nov , 2012 Official ficial Gay Mardi di Gras Guide GayMardiGras.COM