A Letter from Pastor Chris

Transcription

1 Table of Contents A Letter from Pastor Chris... 3 The Goal of the Christian Funeral Service... 4 Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)... 5 Funeral Planning Guide... 9 For the Person Making Advanced Plans For Those Making Plans for a Loved One Visitation Christian Funeral / Memorial Service Plans Committal Service Reception Following the Committal Service Funeral Home Desired Expressions of Sympathy Personal Information Education Information Employment Information Military Information Relatives and Friends to Notify Location of Important Documents Advisors Cemetery and Disposition of Remains Estate Planning... 24

2 2

3 A Letter from Pastor Chris Dear Friend, The Bible s promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ our Savior provides great hope for those who believe. Our great hope is not to be equated as wishful thinking, but rather a hope that s more akin to great confidence. The Apostle Paul wrote, But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus. Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore comfort one another with these words (1 Thess. 4:13-14, 17-18). As Christians, we are certainly spiritually prepared for our death because of Jesus Christ. However, many people are not prepared for their death in terms of preparations that are necessary for the funeral and its arrangements. This handbook has been carefully developed to guide you through the details and provide you with a means of communicating your wishes to your loved ones and those who will handle the logistics of your funeral. Blessings, Pastor Chris 3

4 The Goal of the Christian Funeral Service The gathering of family and friends, who form a community of hope for a funeral or memorial service is a rich opportunity to recall the promises of God through Jesus Christ. A funeral or memorial service should bring comfort to those who mourn as well as bear witness to our faith in Jesus Christ. Because of His suffering, death, and resurrection to new life, each time we gather for a funeral or memorial service we do so in the context of God s promise. Every funeral service will include worship of Jesus Christ as our hope and our salvation, even as we remember the deceased and give thanks to God for the time shared with that person. For this reason, every funeral service will include a focus on the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Furthermore, all that takes place within a funeral service should not only be respectful of the deceased but should honor the name of Jesus Christ. 4

5 Frequently Asked Questions What is the difference between a funeral and a memorial service? Simply stated, at a funeral service the body of the deceased is present, whereas at a memorial service either the ashes of the deceased or no remains are present. Both services provide an opportunity to proclaim the promise of eternal life by grace through faith in Christ Jesus. In addition, a committal service is a brief time of prayer and Scripture reading at the graveside following a funeral service. Should I make pre-arrangements with a Funeral Director? Making the decision to pre-arrange some aspects of your funeral and/or burial is helpful. An appointment with a funeral director in advance of death is a wise step to help you decide what you and your family need from the many services available. If you are a family member caring for a dying loved one, making an initial contact now with a funeral director can be very helpful and will lessen the decisions and demands you ll face upon death. Who is responsible for submitting the death notice and obituary to the newspaper(s)? The funeral director will work with you to make sure the proper information is included in the obituary. They will take care of posting this information appropriately. 5

6 How soon after death does a funeral or memorial service take place? Funeral services are generally held within three to five days following death, thereby allowing appropriate time for family members and friends to gather for the service. Memorial services can be held at any time. However, waiting for weeks or even months after a death will have a bearing on finding a sense of closure, and this will impact the grief work that follows the death of a loved one. Therefore, it is recommended that a memorial service be held at the earliest opportunity. What fees are associated with a funeral or memorial service at First Baptist Church Mount Sterling? FBC does not charge a fee for funeral or memorial services. If you so choose, you may provide an honorarium directly to those who have provided food for a reception, musicians, or the officiating pastor(s). However, there is no obligation or expectation to provide an honorarium. Who makes the arrangements for the musician(s)? The officiating pastor works closely with our worship pastor in planning out the music aspects of the service. Our worship pastor will be available to play the piano and sing hymns during the service. If you choose to have a soloist, a family member should make those arrangements and then notify the officiating pastor to coordinate within the order of service. 6

7 May we have a visitation and/or funeral service at the church? Yes. A visitation time can be scheduled the same day as the funeral service or the evening prior. However, First Baptist Church does not schedule visitations or funeral/memorial services on Sundays or Wednesdays on our campus (that option may be available at the funeral home). Sundays and Wednesdays are reserved for the regular scheduled services of the church. Because we have a school that meets on the campus of First Baptist Church, the following days and times are best for our traffic flow schedule. If the visitation and service are not on the campus of FBC, then the only concern is the availability of our pastoral staff. Monday, 11am Visitation and 1pm Service Tuesday, 11am Visitation and 1pm Service Thursday, 11am Visitation and 1 pm Service Friday, 11am Visitation and 1pm Service Monday, 6-8pm Visitation and Tuesday, 11am Service Thursday, 6-8pm Visitation and Friday, 11am Service Who plans the reception following the funeral or memorial service? After the committal service (graveside service), you may wish for your family to come to the church for a meal. Please contact our church offices to discuss the anticipated number of people attending. We know it is difficult to estimate a number, but we have years of experience of planning these events and with a few questions we can assist you with the estimate. 7

8 Who is responsible for developing the order of service? The officiating pastor will assist the family in developing the order of service. We do not produce bulletins for funeral or memorial services. However, most funeral homes will produce an In Memoriam card. What if I desire to have memorials directed to FBC Mount Sterling or other organizations? This is an honorable thing to do. FBC and any other organizations you choose are blessed when memorials are directed to support their ministries. The funeral director will be happy to include any memorial designation(s) in the notices about the funeral service. Each person who makes a memorial gift to First Baptist Church will receive a personal card of thanks acknowledging their gift in your memory. In addition to the card, all memorial gifts received will be acknowledged in the church s newsletter. We will also notify the family of the deceased to keep them informed of each person (and their address) who gives a memorial gift. Who do I call when death of my loved one occurs? When death occurs, please contact your funeral director. If possible, please contact the church offices at and we will contact the pastor on your behalf. If the church offices are closed, your funeral director will contact the pastor on your behalf. 8

9 Funeral Planning Guide When planning your funeral, or the funeral of a loved one, there are many choices to make. Facing some of those choices now will make the process less demanding for your loved ones later. This handbook will lead you through a variety of decisions. After death, the officiating pastor will meet with family members and review your handbook answers to form the funeral or memorial service. This handbook may be used by: An individual making their advanced plans known, or A family planning the funeral of a loved one nearing death or recently deceased. Please supply as much information as you wish to share on any parts of the handbook. Guide for the Christian funeral of: Print full name above: First, Middle (Maiden), Last Date the handbook was completed 9

10 For the Person Making Advanced Plans: When you have completed this handbook, please inform family members (or close friends) of the handbook and where it can be found. It will be used in consultation with your family or whomever you have directed to carry out these wishes upon your death. Also, after completing the handbook, you may wish to discuss with your family members (or close friends) what you have written to be certain that it is clear. Consider providing an additional copy: 1. To your family. 2. To your pastor. 3. To your funeral director. You may wish to write a note to someone you trust that says: I have recorded by desires regarding my death and burial. I keep this information in the following place:. At the time of my death, I ask that you use this information to provide guidance for my family and my church in making arrangements for the funeral I desire. Although this information is being left for safekeeping, I understand that it is not legally biding or enforceable. This handbook that expresses my desires does not make the church or anyone obligated or responsible for the execution of these instructions. With gratitude, Signature and Date 10

11 For Those Making Plans for a Loved One Please use this handbook to assist with the plans that will honor your loved one s expressed wishes or desires and will reflect his/her values. If you haven t contacted a funeral director, please consider doing so now. The professional services, compassionate care, and guidance they provide will greatly assist you in the days ahead. Visitation A visitation is an informal gathering for friends and family to express sympathy. You are invited to consider FBC Mount Sterling for the visitation when you work with a professional funeral director. Will a visitation be held? q Yes q No Where is the desired location of the visitation? q Funeral Home: q First Baptist Church Mount Sterling q Other: Will the remains be present at the visitation? q Yes, casket with viewing of the body q Yes, closed casket q Yes, urn with photograph next to it q No remains will be present What time will the visitation be? q Morning q Afternoon q Evening Details: 11

12 Will the family provide any displays? q Photographic displays q Mementos (awards, certificates, etc.) q Bible of the deceased Christian Funeral / Memorial Service Plans Where is the desired location of the service? q Funeral Home: q First Baptist Church Mount Sterling q Cemetery (Committal/Graveside Service Only) q Other: What time will the service be? q Morning q Afternoon q Evening Details: Will the remains be present at the service? q Yes ( circle one: casket or urn ) q No What display items will be on/near the casket/urn? q Floral spray q Bible q Photograph q United States Flag (for military) What are some favorite Bible themes or images? q q 12

13 What Scripture passages would you like read? q The pastor may choose the Scripture. q My family will choose the Scripture. q My preferences are indicated below. (Usually 1-2 passages) Old Testament q Job 19:23-27 q Isaiah 40:28-31 q Psalm 23 q Psalm 46 q Psalm 121 q Psalm 139 New Testament q Matthew 5:1-12 q John 14:1-6, q Romans 8:14-23, q Romans 14:7-12 q 2 Corinthians 4:16 5:1 q 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 q Revelation 21 q Revelation 22:1-5 Other Scripture Passage: Will any family members or friends be speaking? Speakers should be aware that a typical eulogy by a family member or friend should not exceed three minutes. It is recommended not to have more than two speakers share a eulogy. q No. q Yes, Name of Person: Relationship to Deceased: q Yes, Name of Person: Relationship to Deceased: 13

14 What hymns would you like played or sung? q The pastor may choose the hymns. q My family will choose the hymns. q My preferences are indicated below. (Usually 2-3 hymns) Suggested Hymns q Amazing Grace q Be Thou My Vision q Blessed Assurance q How Great Thou Art q In The Garden q It Is Well q Leaning on the Everlasting Arms q Rock of Ages q Sweet By and By q The Solid Rock q What A Day That Will Be q Other: What special music would you like sung? (OPTIONAL) This section is for any special music you would like to have sung. q I have asked the following vocalist(s) to sing at my funeral (please include their contact info): Name: Song: Contact: What special music would you like played? (OPTIONAL) This section is for any special music you would like to have played on CD. q I Can Only Imagine q Go Rest High On That Mountain q Other: 14

15 Committal Service The Committal Service (also known as the Graveside Service) is usually a brief reading of Scripture and time of prayer. Military personnel usually have a more involved Committal Service. Names of Pallbearers (Six pallbearers are needed when there is a casket for burial.) Names of Honorary Pallbearers (Large families may choose to identify honorary pallbearers.)

16 Reception Following the Committal Service The reception usually follows the committal service (graveside service) and allows for mutual conversation and consolation. Would you like a reception? q Yes. q No. Location for the reception q FBC Mount Sterling q Other: Attendees for the reception q All family and friends are welcome. q We would prefer this time for family only. Menu for the reception q Dessert and Coffee/Beverages Only q Full Meal Funeral Home Preferred Funeral Home q Coffman Funeral Home & Crematory 315 S. Queen St. (859) q Herald & Stewart Home 1002 Woodford Dr. (859) q Taul Funeral Home 109 E. Main St. (859) q Other: 16 Have Pre-Arrangements Been Made? q Yes. q No. (Please note that the funeral director will handle such issues as military honors, disposition of the body, burial wishes, obituary, grave marker details, etc.)

17 Desired Expressions of Sympathy q Flowers q I desire memorial gifts in lieu of flowers. Memorial Suggestions q FBC Mount Sterling Memorial Fund (This is a fund where memorial gifts are given to the Building Fund of FBC Mt. Sterling.) q Specific Ministry or Mission of FBC Mount Sterling: (You can designate that your memorial fund benefit a specific ministry or mission of FBC. Ideas include: Worship Ministry, Children s Ministry, Student Ministry, Annie Armstrong, Lottie Moon, etc.) q Other: 17

18 Personal Information Full Name: First: Middle: Maiden: Last: Current Address: Street: City: State: Zip: Resident Since: _ Birth Information: Birth Date: Birth City: Birth County: _ Birth State: Family Information: Marital Status: Marriage Date: Name of Spouse: Spouse Living? Name of Father: Father Living? Place of Birth? Year of Birth? 18

19 Name of Mother: Mother Living? Place of Birth? Year of Birth? Name of Child (1): Living? City: State: Zip: Phone: Name of Child (2): Living? City: State: Zip: Phone: Name of Child (3): Living? City: State: Zip: Phone: Name of Child (4): Living? City: State: Zip: Phone: Name of Child (5): Living? City: State: Zip: Phone: 19

20 Education Information High School: (or highest level of education received) College/University: Degree(s): Employment Information Occupation: Employed or Retired: Military Information Branch: Date of Enlistment: Date of Discharge: Serial Number: Special Recognition: Wars Involved: Relatives and Friends to Notify Name: Relationship: Street: City: Phone: State: Zip: 20

21 Name: Relationship: Street: City: State: Zip: Phone: _ Name: Relationship: Street: City: State: Zip: Phone: _ Name: Relationship: Street: City: State: Zip: Phone: _ Name: Relationship: Street: City: State: Zip: Phone: _ 21

22 Location of Important Documents It is important that survivors be able to locate vital records and important documents. Before your death, you should have a current will/living trust and related health care directives which express your wishes on important personal, financial, medical, and charitable issues for your survivors. Will / Living Trust: 22 Living Will: Social Security Card: Cemetery Deeds: Insurance Policy(s): Safety Deposit Box and Keys: Bank Account(s): Real Estate Deed(s): Mortgage Loan(s): Birth Certificate: Marriage Certificate: Divorce Certificate: Stocks and Bonds: Negotiable Papers: Contractual Agreements: Promissory Notes: Other: Other: Other:

23 Advisors Attorney/ Will Preparer: Power of Attorney (Financial): Power of Attorney (Health Care): Executor of Will/ Estate: Guardian (for minor children): Additional Comments: Cemetery and Disposition of Remains q I have made arrangements for my burial. Name of Cemetery: Cemetery Address: Number of Spaces: Which Space: Other Spaces Reserved for: Other Details/Preferences: q I do not have arrangements for my burial. suggest the following arrangements: I 23

24 Estate Planning You may wish to include FBC Mount Sterling in your estate planning. Qualified retirement plans, such as traditional IRA accounts or 401(k) plans, are pre-tax dollars and this means the individual who receives them upon your death may have to pay income taxes when the money is withdrawn. There are IRS rules about minimum required distributions. However, you have the option of naming FBC Mount Sterling or other qualified organizations as beneficiary of all or a portion of these accounts. Your estate will avoid paying income taxes (called income in respect of decedent ), and possibly estate (death) taxes. If this estate planning strategy fits in your overall goals for stewardship, it may be an excellent choice. Please consult your legal or financial advisor. 24