Welcoming the Outsider by Dave Barnhart

Transcription

1 Welcoming the Outsider by Dave Barnhart volume 21, number 29 Shutterstock.com In a culture where shootings and violence are all too frequent, Christians are called to welcome outsiders. What are the risks and benefits of fulfilling the call to love others? What is the role of the church in helping ourselves and outsiders experience the healing power of love? FaithLink is available by subscription via (subservices@abingdonpress.com) or by downloading it from the Web (www. cokesbury.com/faithlink). Print in either color or black and white. Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. Please do not put FaithLink on your website for downloading. The Risks of Hospitality Hospitality would be easy if it were not also dangerous. Any act of welcoming is also a risk. That risk was made real in Charleston at Emanuel AME Church in June. The mass shooter sat with a small group as they studied the Bible for nearly an hour before he declared his intention to start a race war and opened fire, killing nine people. The murders were horrific and stunning even more because of the killer s overt racist motivation. But the violence also violated our Christian notions of hospitality and sanctuary. TIME and other news outlets ran articles addressing the presence of guns in the pew and the pulpit. It told the story of how some pastors and their parishioners chose to arm themselves in case of potential danger. Several of the churches that I know have had discussions among staff and leadership about how to balance security and hospitality so that their churches remain sanctuaries. FEMA issued guidelines in 2013 to help houses of worship develop emergency operations plans (see Helpful Links ). Yet the tradition of welcoming the stranger, in spite of potential risks or our anxiety, is as old as our Jewish and Christian heritage. In Genesis 18, God visits Abraham disguised as a stranger who shows up unannounced at his tent. Hospitality in the ancient world was not only an ethical obligation, but it could also be a matter of survival for those seeking sanctuary. Abraham and Sarah prepare a sumptuous meal for their guests. It s only after their extravagant welcome that God blesses them by foretelling the birth of their son, Isaac. It s not clear at what point Abraham realizes that he s entertaining God and his divine entourage, but the implications for those who believe in God are clear: God may visit us as a stranger. Over 1,000 years later, the author of Hebrews would write, Don t neglect to open up your homes to guests, because by doing this some have been hosts to angels without knowing it (Hebrews 13:2). Follow us on Facebook and Twitter. 1

2 volume 21, number 29 Core Bible Passages One of the most powerful Scriptures regarding outsiders comes from Leviticus 19. The same chapter that says, Love your neighbor as yourself (verse 18) includes this command: Any immigrant who lives with you must be treated as if they were one of your citizens. You must love them as yourself, because you were immigrants in the land of Egypt; I am the Lord your God (verse 34). In the ancient world, immigrants were definitely outsiders. The lawyer who challenges Jesus by asking, Who is my neighbor? (Luke 10:29) probably knew this chapter by heart. He knew as well as Jesus that God doesn t distinguish between neighbors and outsiders, so Jesus chooses to make the hero of his example story a Samaritan the ultimate outsider for Jews of his day (Luke 10:33). It would be like telling the same story today in a church but making a Muslim or an atheist the story s hero. Ruth, the hero of the book named after her, was also an outsider. The narrator makes a point of emphasizing her place of origin; several times in the story, she is referred to as a Moabite from Moab (Ruth 1:22; 2:6). Since intermarriage with Moabites is flatly condemned in Deuteronomy 23:3, the author seems to be highlighting Ruth s outsider status. Like in a modern romance, though, she woos and marries a high-status Israelite and becomes the grandmother of the greatest king of Israel s history, David. Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. Permission given to copy pages 1 4 for use in a group setting. Please do not put FaithLink on your website for downloading. The text doesn t reveal if Abraham kept a dagger on his hip as he poured the drinks, or if Sarah had any apprehension about opening her home to potentially dangerous guests. But we do know what happens in the next chapter when neighboring cities treat the divine strangers with suspicion and hostility. The cities are wiped off the map (Genesis 19). Welcoming strangers brings God s blessing. Treating them as enemies brings destruction. When Jesus decides to illustrate God s impartial love for all people, he uses the example, If you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing [than anyone else]? Don t even the Gentiles do the same? (Matthew 5:47). Greeting and welcoming people we don t know, even those we may consider enemies or outsiders, is part of the love Jesus desires from his followers. Who Is an Outsider? Jesus shapes the dialogue about who is an outsider or an insider when a lawyer asks him, Who is my neighbor? (Luke 10:29). Jesus responds by telling a story about several people who ignore a man in need and a Samaritan, the ultimate outsider, who responds to the person. Jesus challenges all of us by asking, Which one of these three was a neighbor to the man? Part of the message of the gospel is that grace often comes to us by people we don t consider to be our neighbors or fellow insiders (Luke 10:30-37). In Saint Augustine s Confessions, he shares the argument of two friends. One claims he can be a Christian without being in a church. The other replies, I will not believe it, nor will I rank you among Christians, unless I see you in the Church of Christ. The first retorts, Do walls then make Christians? Augustine observes that becoming part of a community of believers isn t optional it s part and parcel of following Jesus. In this sense, walls do make Christians. There s a distinction between those inside and outside those inside affirm that they re part of a group of Jesus-following believers. We can easily envision a future in which church outsiders are the majority if that future is not already here now. People feel alienated from church for a variety of reasons, and for many churches their biggest task is simply to reach outsiders at all. It takes courage for an outsider to set foot in a sanctuary, and it takes courage for a church to show welcome. Welcoming outsiders involves risk, work, and sacrifice giving up the best seat at the table, sacrificing the fatted calf, putting out the good china and silverware (which might get cracked or stolen), or even changing our customs. Good hospitality means not embarrassing your guests if they use the wrong fork at the table or fail to stand at the proper place in the liturgy. One common point of contention for churches in welcoming ministries is how they conduct the passing of the peace or the meet and greet time (see Meet and Greet ). One blogger polled 2

3 volume 21, number 29 Welcoming Practices The Lewis Center for Leadership has a list of 50 Ways to Welcome New People (see Helpful Links ). Among some of their suggestions are post clear exterior and interior signage for guests; reserve parking spaces for guests; avoid insider language in announcements, the worship bulletin, and the worship service itself; ask worship participants and leaders to be exit greeters since guests will recognize their faces; provide nametags for the whole congregation (and wear them!); assign people with the gift of hospitality to be greeters. These last two points have been interesting discussions at our new church. When we started, we avoided preprinted nametags because we didn t want to make a distinction between insiders and outsiders. But we learned from guests that they liked it when our members wore nametags because it was easy to know who to go to if they had questions. I know many pastors who have observed that often the least social people are drawn to greeting ministry because they re hungry for scripted and limited social interaction. Therefore, churches often wind up with their least social people on their greeter teams! Gregarious greeters make a better impression on guests, so it s doubly important that people with the gift of hospitality and who like socializing make our first impressions. Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. Permission given to copy pages 1 4 for use in a group setting. Please do not put FaithLink on your website for downloading. first-time guests about how they experienced this time, and many didn t like it to the point that they wouldn t return! (See Thom Rainer s blog in Helpful Links. ) It s worth it for communities to think carefully about how they think they welcome outsiders and the ways those welcomes can be unwelcome. Few churches I ve attended ask guests to stand and introduce themselves, and although I don t mind it (since I m used to speaking in front of people), others would prefer for the earth to open and swallow them whole. Reminding outsiders that they are outsiders is one of the best ways to make them feel unwelcome. Hospitality Is Hard In her book Living Into Community, Christine Pohl names several fears that reflect just how hard it is to show welcome to outsiders. Among the fears she names are (1) The anxiety of making a good impression. Just as those of us whose homes are less than tidy are afraid to have anyone over, churches can also fear the silent judgment of outsiders. If our nursery isn t adequate or our sound system isn t state-of-the-art, how welcoming can we be? Pohl suggests that hospitality is an invitation to mutual truthfulness and not just about making the best first impression. (2) Those we welcome will either be dangerous or take advantage of our welcome. Pohl suggests that boundaries and practices that guard against deception are an important part of community discernment in offering hospitality, but every welcome carries an element of risk. (3) Our hospitality will simply be ignored; guests won t respond to an invitation. Pohl says, When viewed as a [growth] strategy, hospitality is usually short-lived. Hospitality is a core principle and a way of being, not just a way to get more people. I would add that hospitality of this sort is seldom aimed at the outsider but rather at people who already look and act like us. (4) Guests won t be appropriately grateful. Since hospitality shouldn t be given grudgingly, it also needs to be offered without strings or expectation of reciprocity. While it s nice to have grateful guests, it s important to remember that in situations where guests feel dependent, shamed, or powerless, they may not have the psychological energy to be grateful. Churches rooted in the gospel naturally have an outward focus, a desire to welcome outsiders not simply for the purpose of making them insiders but also to experience the grace to be given and received in such an encounter. Jesus own life embodies the risk and blessing of living out this welcome. We experience him both as host of a banquet and a guest at our table, and in his death and resurrection we see a life open to danger and to transformation by simply welcoming the outsider. 3

4 volume 21, number 29 Meet and Greet Should we say goodbye to saying hello? The most common answer to Thom Rainer s unscientific Twitter poll asking why first-time guests didn t return to church was the church meet and greet time. Many guests feel awkward during the time, wondering what to do with their hands or standing alone while insiders greet one another, sharing news from the week. Rather than feel welcome, guests feel all the more like outsiders. At our church, we name that awkwardness out front. We say that passing the peace is an ancient ritual that takes seriously Jesus statement in the Sermon on the Mount, If you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing [than anyone else]? (Matthew 5:43-48). The formulaic greeting Peace be with you; and also with you is a way for us to practice what we should be doing all week greeting strangers, in the same way that passing the offering plate is a way to practice generosity. Even how we greet one another is contentious, and how we greet others displays our values and assumptions. How should we greet others if at all? What does our greeting really say? United Methodist Perspective Some of Charles Wesley s most powerful writing is in his hymn Come, O Thou Traveler Unknown (The United Methodist Hymnal, 387). He uses the image of Jacob wrestling with God at the Jabbok River from Genesis 32:22-32 to describe God as a stranger with whom he struggles. Charles seems to understand that encountering God as a stranger is a risk as well as a blessing. Charles also penned these verses about the welcome upon which we all depend: Come, sinners, to the gospel feast; let every soul be Jesus guest. Ye need not one be left behind, for God hath bid all humankind (Hymnal, 339). In John Wesley s sermon On Visiting the Sick, he describes one problem when people from different stations of life fail to interact. One great reason why the rich, in general, have so little sympathy for the poor, is, because they so seldom visit them. Hence it is, that, according to the common observation, one part of the world does not know what the other suffers. Helpful Links The Lewis Center s 50 ways to Welcome New People FEMA s document Guide for Developing High-Quality Emergency Operations Plans for Houses of Worship Thom Rainer s blog post Top Ten Ways Churches Drive Away First-Time Guests Rainer s follow-up to the article above, Should Your Church Stop Having a Stand and Greet Time? Dave Barnhart is pastor of Saint Junia United Methodist Church in Birmingham, Alabama. Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. Permission given to copy pages 1 4 for use in a group setting. Please do not put FaithLink on your website for downloading. FaithLink: Connecting Faith and Life is a weekly, topical study and an official resource for The United Methodist Church approved by Discipleship Ministries and published weekly by Cokesbury, The United Methodist Publishing House, 2222 Rosa L. Parks Blvd., P.O. Box , Nashville, TN Scripture quotations in this publication, unless otherwise indicated, are from the Common English Bible, copyrighted 2011 Common English Bible, and are used by permission. Permission is granted to photocopy pages 1 4 of this resource for use in FaithLink study groups. All Web addresses were correct and operational at the time of publication. Fax comments to FaithLink, , or send to faithlinkgroup@umpublishing.org. For fax problems, fax FREE to For problems, send to Cokes_Serv@umpublishing.org. To order, call , or visit our website at 4

5 volume 21 number 29 volume 21 number 29 Multitasking Welcoming the Outsider What is the role of the church in helping ourselves and outsiders experience the healing power of love? CREATE Your Teaching Plan Keeping in mind your group members and your group time, choose from among the OPEN, EXPLORE, and CLOSE activities or from Teaching Alternative to plan the session. OPEN the Session Pray Together Read or sing together the Charles Wesley hymn Come, Sinners, to the Gospel Feast (The United Methodist Hymnal, 339). Pray: God, help us to welcome all to feast at your table and to share in your abundant life. Amen. Discuss Your Experience On a large sheet of paper or a markerboard, make two columns and label them Welcome and Unwelcome. Ask: Without naming particular churches or denominations, how have you experienced being welcomed in other churches? Was there a high or low point in your experience? Was there a church that did an especially good or poor job of making you feel welcome? Write down the church practices that made participants feel welcome or unwelcome. After they have shared, ask: Are there any common themes or attitudes that you see in the practices we ve listed? What do churches communicate with these practices? EXPLORE the Topic Discuss Meet and Greet Read aloud Meet and Greet. Ask: How many of you feel that greeting during worship is an important practice? How many feel that it s off-putting? Are there other ways that churches can connect people socially around worship? Read aloud Matthew 5: Ask: Why, when talking about loving enemies and loving perfectly, does Jesus use the example of greeting? How would one live this out in the church? How would one live this out in the world outside of the church? Study Hospitality in Genesis Read aloud Genesis 18:1-10. Ask: What kind of language does the author use to indicate Abraham s urgency? (Depending on your translation, the words may include ran, hastened, hurried, and so forth). Why do you think Abraham is in such a hurry? Say: The author points out that hospitality in the ancient world was not only an obligation but also could be a matter of survival. What kind of dangers did travelers and nomads face in the wilderness? Read and Discuss The Risks of Hospitality Read or review this section of the main essay. Ask: Do you agree that welcoming others is risky? What kind of risks, besides violence, do outsiders bring? What other ways do we communicate defensiveness besides arming ourselves? Also ask: When we discuss violence and danger in our world, do we rely more heavily on the news media or the Bible? How violent and dangerous was Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. 5

6 the world of Abraham s day? of Jesus day? What were some of those risks? Examine Who Is an Outsider? Read or review this section. Say: The lawyer asked, Who is my neighbor? One way to flip this question around is to ask, Who might consider themselves an outsider to our community? This can be a sensitive topic because most churches want to think of themselves as welcoming. Ask: But who might consider themselves an outsider to our community? What extra steps can we take to extend welcome to them? Read and Discuss Core Bible Passages Read this section aloud. Ask: Why do you think so many stories from the Old Testament focus on the experience of being strangers in a strange land? Are there any other Bible stories that you can think of that focus on the experience of being an outsider or foreigner? (Some suggestions might include Esther, Moses, Jonah, Jeremiah, Tamar, and Jacob.) Are there modern stories from books, movies, or television of being an outsider that are particularly important in our culture? What do these stories say to you about the importance of extending welcome or the experience of being an outsider? Examine Challenges to Hospitality Read the section Hospitality Is Hard. Ask: Do you see any of these obstacles in our faith community? Are there other fears or obstacles that make it difficult for churches to welcome outsiders? How might personal or cultural expectations change how we perceive hospitality? Make a Welcome Task List Read aloud Welcoming Practices, or follow up by printing copies of the Lewis Center s 50 Ways to Welcome New People. Ask: Do any of these practices resonate with you? Which ones are we already doing in our community? Which sound like potential helps for our community? Write down the responses on a large sheet of paper or a markerboard. If any seem to have particular energy behind them, suggest following up with your church leaders. CLOSE the Session Pray Together God, in the spirit of Ruth and Naomi, we come as both insiders and outsiders. We have been made part of your family. You are one who both claims us and gives us a new identity. We thank you for the love of Jesus, which includes, transforms, and bestows abundant life. May we find healing at your table, sustenance for our journey, and courage to proclaim the gospel to the world. Amen. volume 21, number 29 Teaching Alternative The FEMA document (see Helpful Links ) contains information about natural disasters as well as active shooter situations. The helpfulness of the document depends greatly on your church size, location, and resources. If your church is large, invite a staff person or church leader to share with your group about balancing security and hospitality. Regardless of your church size, consider discussing these questions with your group: Does your community consider this kind of conversation fruitful or fearful? Does it provide opportunity to reflect more deeply on the real risks and benefits of hospitality, or does it simply lead to drama and hand-wringing? Next Week in Eating Disorders In the United States, up to 30 million people of all ages and genders have an eating disorder. What are eating disorders, and why are they dangerous? How can Christians offer support, healing, and hope for those who live with them? Copyright 2015 by Cokesbury. 6