On the authority of Tamim Al-Dari that the Prophet sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam said:

Transcription

1 24 Oct An Nawawi s Forty Hadith Hadith No 7 On the authority of Tamim Al-Dari that the Prophet sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam said: "Religion is sincerity". We said: "To whom?" He said: "To Allah and His Book, and His messenger, and to the leaders of the Muslims and their common folk". narrated by Muslim Important is stability in the family stable relations with your mother, father, husband and children. Islam has great emphasis on the family Islam is not like other religions regarding the family. Good relation with the family is ordained by Allah subhana wa ta ala good relations with the family will give you peace of mind. Rights of the parents Your duty to your mother and father, your duty towards your parents who have passed away, your duty towards parents who are disbelievers and your duty towards your parents who are disbelievers or unjust. You need to know the rights of parents When you look at how your children treat you they don t give me my rights - Look at my own rights to my parents. Your parenst are a means for your existence Chapter (4) sūrat l-nisāa (The Women) 4:36 Worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, and to parents do good, and to relatives, orphans, the needy, the near neighbour, the neighbour farther away, the companion at your side, the traveller, and those whom your right hands possess. Indeed, Allah does not like those who are self-deluding and boastful. The rights of Allah subhana wa ta ala Your job is to worship Allah subhana wa ta ala we are here because Allah subhana wa ta ala created you parents are a means of your existence What am I supposed to do for my parents? do good Be dutiful to your parents - al ih san???? It is not a favour but a right Allah subhana wa ta ala is telling you how? with ih san the best. With friends it is different with parents you must always behave in the best manner. Ihsan comes from husn, which literally means beauty or to make beautiful. Ihsan means to do the UTMOST good and it is usually translated as excellence. When one does ihsan, they beautify their deeds to the fullest. They go all out and make sure every little detail is done properly. They do not do the least amount of good to get the job done, rather they do the

2 utmost good the greatest possible good they are capable of doing and they do not fall short in this. Chapter (29) sūrat l-ʿankabūt (The Spider) 29:8 And We have enjoined upon man goodness to parents. But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them. To Me is your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do. Biwālidayhi hus na (goodness to his parents) - deal with parents in the best manner. Don t do things for your parents as if you are doing them a favour no - always do the best. Abu 'Amr ash-shaybani said, "The owner of this house (and he pointed at the house of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud) said, "I asked the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, which action Allah loves best. He replied, 'Prayer at its proper time.' 'Then what?' I asked. He said, 'Then kindness to parents." I asked, 'Then what?' He replied, 'Then jihad in the Way of Allah.'" He added, "He told me about these things. If I had asked him to tell me more, he would have told me more." Pray on time, give your parents their rights birr al walidayn (righteousness to parents) 'Ata' said, "I went to Ibn 'Abbas and asked him, 'Why did you ask him whether his mother was alive?' He replied, 'I do not know of any action better for bringing a person near to Allah than dutifulness to his mother.'" Why? Allah subhana wa ta ala is teaching us to be grateful to the people who are teaching us. They are a means of your existence. They care for you. Especially the mother. The rights of te mother are 3 times more than the father. Abu Hurayra said, "The Prophet was asked, 'Messenger of Allah, to whom should I be dutiful?' 'Your mother,' he replied. He was asked, 'Then whom?' 'Your mother,' he replied. He was asked, 'Then whom?' 'Your mother,' he replied. He was asked, 'Then whom?' He replied, 'Your father.'" How much your mother sacrifices for you, takes care of you, does not sleep for you, makes sacrifices for you. Of course the Father also makes sacrifices for his own children. Make a point of visiting your parents. Some women feel jealous of mother in law they try to remove husband from his mother slowly, slowly. The Husband is caught between 2 women. There is no competition, she is the mother and you are his wife, you need to know your responsibilities. You should encourage the husband to go to his mother and do things for her. For your husband the priority is the mother. For the wife the priority is the husband. 'Abdullah ibn 'Amr said, "A man came to the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and made a pledge to him that he would do hijra. He left his parents who were in tears. The Prophet said, 'Go back to them and make them laugh as you made them weep.'" The believer cannot sleep if he knows his parents are crying. Today children are making parents sad. Story of a couple who went to the beach with their kids. They saw an old lady sitting alone. Sunset came and she was still sitting alone. They asked her does she need a lift somewhere. She said she was waiting for her son. he dropped her off in the morning. They asked He left

3 you alone. She remembered that her son gave her a piece of paper. The note said Whoever finds this lady take her to old peoples home. Not just by our actions we harm our parents. In Islam we take care of our parents. 1. Obey the parents. Except if they try to make you commit a sin. But you don t rebel against them. No matter how evil they are you need to obey them. Do not show your parents impatience. When they are old they don t have many responsibilities, they are waiting for your call. A Sheikh told a man to visit his mother. The man said how can I, I always eat with my family. He went to visit his mother and said She was so happy that I gave her company. Alhamdulillah what you advised me was as if I was in paradise. She was giving me dua all the time. I have jannah there and I am neglecting that. Dua of mother is acceptable. Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam said the dua of the prayer is never rejected. We obey them when they tell you something you like. Allah subhana wa ta ala will test you when your parents command you to do something you don t like. When you obey them to obey Allah subhana wa ta ala, you are not to just obeying them. You need to be patient, not to say ooph. They will tell you things you don t like, about your friends etc. Amr al Husab. Friend having a wife. The friends father is telling him to divorce his wife. Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam said obey your fatherbb. This hadith does not mean you divorce these things happen out of jealousy is there a valid reason for the divorce. People say father can divorce children. Obey them in the things you desire and don t desire except divorce. If the Mother asks you to commit bidah, shirk or kufur you don t obey them, you have to obey Allah subhana wa ta ala first. Allah subhana wa ta ala will put you in a test, to do something you don t like. Even as grown ups your mother is telling you what to do. When you have new baby everyone is telling you want to do. You get upset and angry. We don t obey them, why is this happening - it is a test for us. Are we really obeying Allah subhana wa ta ala? They will interfere in your life. Think about it as a test from Allah subhana wa ta ala. How will you show them that you are patient? As they you parent get old they tend to repeat things a lot, you want to change something but they don t want to change. Say to them you like this or that, keep it like it is. Don t make small, minor things into issues. Everyone wants their own way especially with children. Think I obey because Allah subhana wa ta ala, He commanded me to obey. If you argue with the mother in law your husband will be in the middle. Obedience by itself is barakat. Obey if you like it or don t like it except when it is haram. When you say InshaAllah when your mother asks you to do something you will win her heart. When you obey for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta ala, Allah subhana wa ta ala will put berakat in the deed / act. Abu Hurayra reported that he heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, say, "No human child has ever spoken in the cradle except for 'Isa ibn Maryam, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and the companion of Jurayj." Abu Hurayra asked, "Prophet of Allah, who was the companion of Jurayj?" The Prophet replied, "Jurayj was a monk who lived in a hermitage. There was a cowherd who used to come to the foot of his hermitage and a woman from the village used to come to the cowherd. "One day his mother came while he was praying and called out, 'Jurayj!' He asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He concluded that he should prefer the prayer. She shouted to him

4 a second time and he again asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He thought that he should prefer the prayer. She shouted a third time and yet again he asked himself, 'My mother or my prayer?' He again concluded that he should prefer the prayer. When he did not answer her, she said, 'Jurayj, may Allah not let you die until you have looked at the faces of the beautiful women.' Then she left. "Then the village woman was brought before the king after she had given birth to a child. He asked, 'Whose is it?' 'Jurayj's,' she replied. He asked, 'The man in the hermitage?' 'Yes,' she answered. He ordered, 'Destroy his hermitage and bring him to me.' They hacked at his hermitage with axes until it collapsed. They bound his hand to his neck with a rope and took him along to the king. When he passed by the beautiful women, he saw them and smiled. They were looking at him along with the people. "The king asked, 'Do you know what this woman claims?' 'What does she claim?' he asked. He replied, 'She claims that you are the father of her child.' He asked her, 'Where is the child?' They replied, 'It is in her room.' He went to the child and said, 'Who is your father?' 'The cowherd,' he replied. The king said, 'Shall we build your hermitage out of gold?' 'No,' he replied. He asked, 'Of silver?' 'No,' he replied. The king asked, 'What shall we build it with?' He said, 'Put it back the way you found it.' Then the king asked, 'What made you smile.' 'Something I recognised,' he replied, 'The supplication of my mother overtook me.' Then he told him about it." Hadith: A man came to Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam and said I commit a great sin, I want to repent. Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam asked the man Do you a mother? She is one means for seeking forgiveness, being dutiful to her and being good to her it will expiate you sins. One man during time of Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam carried his mother around the Kaba. He said Do you see why I am doing this? It is not like even one labour pain that she had. 2. take permission from them When you are young that is easy. It is more difficult when leave your home. When going or coming from work, travelling, the mother doesn t know where her son is. Inform your mother where you are, take your parents permission, if living in the same place. When making a big decision, changing your house, marrying, etc. update them. They are waiting for you to come. 'Abdullah ibn 'Amr said, "A man came to the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, wanting to do jihad. The Prophet asked, 'Are your parents alive?' 'Yes,' he replied. he said, 'Then exert yourself on their behalf.'" 3. visit them very often As if you are being dutiful to them. A man with many sons would only see his children and grandchildren once a week. He was exhausted because everyone would come on the same day. It is better come on different days. Too were visiting him on one day and then he was alone for the rest of the week. Do this happily for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta ala. Parents keep repeat things but you must listen to them as if you never heard it before, showing patience. There was a business man with a big house who the only son. The wife said I don t want mother in law in my house. He put her somewhere else and never asked about her. The mother before the time of death, she wanted to see her son. The people taking care of the mother phoned the son but he hung up phone and didn t come. She passed away and he did nothing for her. His children will do the same to him.

5 A man was always advising his son. The son was very angry and upset with his father nagging him all the time. The son took his father to the desert to kill him. The Father cried and said kill me on this stone. The son asked why? The father said because I killed my father on this same stone. The ahzab will come in this life. An old man needed someone to take him to the washroom. He had 10 children but no one want to do it. They hired a servant to deal with parents from morning to night. When parents become old they need someone to look after them most people bring a nurse or somebody. But the one doing that, imagine how much Allah subhana wa ta ala will bless them. Allah will bless his dunya and his akhirah. 4. care about your parents reputation. If someone is good people will say because it is of the mother or father. Don t ruin their reputation. If someone behaves badly people will say the Mother did not teach the children well. Everything goes back to the mother. Abu Hurayra saw two men and said to one of them, "Who is this man in relation to you?" He is my father," he replied. He said, "Do not call him by his own name nor walk in front of him nor sit down before him." While you are sitting with them don t go above them. When you are walking with them don t go ahead of them. Today mothers are afraid of their children. A Sign of the Day of Judgement. Hadith: a slave girl will give birth to her slave master. Children should be afraid of parents. A man was asked Describe to me your father. He replied I cannot because I never looked at his eyes. Atheist from the east the family is still important, they are raised honouring and respecting their elders. We have this in Islam. Duties for the parents. Sunnah of the Day Sunnah in the wudu. Wudu for each prayer. Sometimes one wudu for all five prayers. Do not waste water. One handful of water. Make once, twice or three times. More than 3 times it is bidah. Wash mouth and nose at the same time. Sniff with the left hand. Wiping whole head or wipe go back and then come forward. Beginning of wudu say BisBB Finish wudu say dua. AshBB..all the joys of paradise will be open for you. Dua s during prayer. Opening supplication.

6 O Allaah, distance me from my sins just as You have distanced The East from The West, O Allaah, purify me of my sins as a white robe is purified of filth, O Allaah, cleanse me of my sins with snow, water, and ice.