25So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are members of one another.

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1 Introduction In Chapter 4 of Ephesians Paul speaks of the greatness in the church (vv.1-6); the gifts in the church (vv.7-13); and growth in the church (vv.14-16). We are saved by grace. Our hearts were dead, dark and hard (vv.17-19) but Christ has delivered us and given us new life (vv.20-21). Paul notes that we are changed and issues a challenge to walk differently. With our new life must come a new look. We put off the old dispositions and desires and directions that led us away from Christ and put on new dispositions, desires and walk in a new direction. We are to put on the new man (v.24). The old man was what we were before Christ and the new man is who we are in Christ. The new man was created by Christ. We are given a new nature and an incorruptible life. There are two words in the Greek language that translate the English word new. Neos which means fresh or new-just made but there are others like it. Kainos just made but there is nothing like it in existence. We might think of this as new and unique. Kainos is the word Paul uses in verse 24 new and unique. The new man in Christ is new and unique Jesus Christ makes us new and unique. The Gentile is not made into a Jew or a the Jew a Gentile. We are a new kind of person a new kind of being. We begin life all over again! How is this even possible? It is made possible by the Word of God and the power of God. When a person believes in Jesus that is trusts and believes the gospel God creates the person in righteousness and holiness. God takes our faith (read trust) in Christ and credits it as the righteousness of Christ. We are justified. Our spirit was dead to God but now has been made alive. We are born again spiritually. The Bible teaches that God places His divine nature into the heart of the believer. God actually creates a new man out of the believer. We are renewed by the Holy Spirit. The old nature is Adam s nature. The new nature is Christ s nature. We inherited Adam s nature in our physical birth and we inherit Christ s nature when we are born again. The nature of Jesus was marked by righteousness and holiness. Christ-like Christians put on the robes of righteousness and holiness and carnal Christians retain the rags of the old-man or the old nature. What s changed? Our tongue and temper (vv.25-26)! Our ability to deal with temptation (v.27). We must not grieve or pain the Holy Spirit (v.30) by whom we are sealed to the day of redemption. We are to strip away all bitterness, wrath, anger, quarreling and injurious speech (v. 31). Instead we will put on the garments of kindness, tenderness and forgiveness (v.32). Tell The Truth Instead of Lying (v.25) 25So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are members of one another. Paul reaches into the Old Testament and remembers a line from Zechariah 8:16; These are the you shall do: Speak each man the truth to his neighbor. Paul begins with lying. The ancient world had the same problem as the modern world. Lying seems to be the pervasive problem of the unregenerate man or the old man. We ve all the heard the joke how do you know when a lawyer is lying? His lips are moving. The sad fact is that lying is not reserved for the 1

2 unregenerate or the lawyer but is found everywhere and seeming practiced by everyone. When Isaiah received his vision of The Lord and Heaven and angels (Isaiah 6:1-4) he said; Woe is me, for I am undone! Because I am a man of unclean lips, And I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; For my eyes have seen the King, The Lord of Hosts (Isaiah 6:5). The government will render harsh punishments for Citizens who lie but seem much more gracious when the government s agents lie to citizens. The reason Paul gives for not lying to one another is...for we are members of one another. But we don t feel that way. We feel like our lives belong to ourselves and that other people s lives do not belong to us. Paul does not simply say Don t lie because God is the God of truth or don t lie because Satan is a liar and we join ranks with Satan when we lie. Does the Bible prohibit lying? Yes. Is Satan the Father of lies. Yes. But offers an entirely different motivation for honesty. We belong to one another. Paul in effect is saying when you lie to one another you are in effect creating harm for all. Be Angry And Do Not Sin (vv.26-27) 26Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, The second thing Paul mentions is anger. Paul does not say don t ever be angry. The word Paul uses for anger...is not momentary, outward, boiling over rage or inward seething resentment, but rather a deep seated, determined settled conviction (John MacArthur p. 184). Be angry and do not sin must mean there is a kind of anger that is not sinful. Anger is not a sin but we can respond in anger in a way that is sinful. In verse 31 Paul will provide a special grouping of attitudes that result in part from unresolved anger. The two words are malice and wrath. Paul does not say do not let the sun go down on your malice or wrath but do not let the sun go down on your anger. Why? Because anger left overnight anger left to simmer and stew quickly becomes bitterness and resentment and malice. For we ourselves were also once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy (Titus 3:3). The person who is filled with malice can be heard to say maybe now they ll know how I feel. When the same anger becomes explosive and external it is called wrath. Malice includes clamming up. Wrath includes blowing up. God does not want us to clam up or blow up but grow up. You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of judgment. But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of judgment. And whoever says to his brother, Raca! Shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, You fool! shall be in danger of hell fire (Matthew 5:21-22). There is a kind of anger that Jesus places in the same category as murder. Jesus knew that murder begins in the heart. 2

3 27and do not make room for the devil. Paul has touched on our tongue, and our temper and now the tempter. One of the ministries of the Holy Spirit is to keep us safe and secure. We must submit to God and resist the devil (James 4:7). Here Paul writes;...do not make room for the devil. We must not give Satan advantage. The Holy Spirit helps us in the weakness of our flesh. The Holy Spirit helps us in the wickedness of this world. The Holy Spirit helps us against the wiles of the Devil. But we too must offer resistance. We aren t supposed to make the Holy Spirit s job more difficult. We could translate this; leave no room or foothold for the devil; allow him no opportunity. Lies and anger provide fertile soil for the enemy to grow his garden in your heart. Do you want to do the devil a favor? Continue to lie. Make excuses for your anger. Tell yourself and others you deserve to be mad. Jesus told the religious leaders; You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it (John 8:44 NKJV). Work Instead Of Steal (v.28) 28 Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with his hands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need (NKJV) The Greek word for steal is klepto. What is God s solution to kleptomania? Years of therapy and in depth counseling? The thief should stop stealing and start working. But more than that! Work in order to give to others in need! Kent Hughes tells the story of a preacher named Dr. Rowland Hill. Dr. Hill was robbed at gun-point. He told the man that if he put the gun down he would offer him gainful employment. The man did just that and became Dr. Rowland s most faithful and diligent employee. The man was saved born again. God changed this man. In the first century times were often difficult. It was not unusual for slaves to steal from their masters. Paul warns against stealing (pilfering). Show integrity (Titus 2:13). People engage in petty larceny and pilfering all the while thinking that the business will never miss what s gone. I am sure that Judas did not start life off as a thief. Judas believed Satan s lies. Then Judas became angry and disillusioned with Jesus. What about the problem of theft? A study conducted and presented to the American Psychological Association on employee theft in the marketplace revealed that some 8 billion 3

4 dollars a year is lost through petty pilfering. The breakdown included losses to clerical errors (10%); shoplifting (30%); employee theft (60%). For those who can it is God s will for them to work. Paul says work with his hands what is good (agathos). It means good in quality a job well done with attention to detail. Our work should not cause harm to others. Our work should help not harm. To work with one s own hands means that every worker is responsible for his or her own work. Speak What Is Good Instead Of What Is Rotten (v.29) 29Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers (NKJV). The word corrupt can be translated unwholesome. Sapros was a word that described that which is rotten or spoiled (like moldy fruit or vegetables the consequence of decay) hence corrupt or foul. This would certainly include course language what we call dirty language. In other words this is language that includes filthy jokes, lewd comments, unwholesome language. Do you know what is more gross than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half-a worm. Filthy language should be as attractive as biting into a red juicy apple filled with maggots. The tongue can only speak what the heart gives it to say. Paul wants us to speak in such a way that we build each other up instead of tear each other down. That is the meaning of what is good for necessary edification and grace to the hearers. Paul seems to be saying speak what is good and wholesome for that moment. You might think; I told the truth. But sometimes the truth spoken absent love and absent grace and absent compassion wounds rather than heals. Let me be clear. I am not suggesting that we employ lies or refrain from telling the truth in order to spare one s feelings. I am saying that a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. Paul is not advocating the raw and insensitive words that are meant to wound rather than heal. I am reminded of a slave in the ancient world who took small amounts of poison in ever increasing doses until his breath could wither people. It was said of Augustine that he hung a motto in his dining room; he who speaks evil of an absent man or woman is not welcome at this table. Grace Instead Of Grief (vv.30-32) 30And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with which you were marked with a seal for the day of redemption. 4

5 Doesn t God care about how I feel? I think the answer is yes. Paul wants to know do you care about how God feels! What does it mean to grieve or pain the Holy Spirit of God? All sin is grievous. But sin in the children of God is especially grievous. We find it hard to imagine the invisible Holy Spirit weeping over our sin. We find it easy to imagine our father s disappointment or our mother s tears or our friend s disapproval. But when we lie, or fail to tell the truth, when we steal or when we act our anger in ways that are dishonoring to God we grieve the Holy Spirit of God. The word grieved is in the active voice and means to cause pain or sorrow. We know the Holy Spirit can be resisted (Acts 7:51). That sin is reserved for the unbeliever. The Holy Spirit can be blasphemed. That sin also is reserved for the unbeliever but I suspect is linked to the person who repeatedly hears the gospel; resists the Holy Spirit and then refuses the Holy Spirit s conviction and confession concerning Christ. The religious leaders during the earthly ministry of Jesus saw the miracles of Jesus could not deny them but attributed them to the working of Satan. If you believe that Jesus was the pawn of Satan and die in that belief you certainly cannot be saved. The Holy Spirit can be quenched (1 Thessalonians 5:19). Do not quench the Holy Spirit. This is a sin reserved for the Church. When we quench the Spirit of God we forfeit power and blessing (see John MacArthur p. 189). The Holy Spirit can be resisted, blasphemed, quenched, and grieved. This means the Holy Spirit is a Person who feels, and speaks, and wills and works. The Holy Spirit is not simply a force or an energy or a power. The Holy Spirit is a Person. Only believers can grieve the Holy Spirit. John Phillips writes; The word grieved is a love word. You cannot grieve someone who does not love you. You might annoy, upset, infuriate, or disappoint him, but you cannot grieve him. You can only grieve someone who loves you. You can grieve the Holy Spirit (Exploring Ephesians; p.137). How do we grieve the Holy Spirit? When we act contrary to the Word of God or the will of God. When we think or act in a way that is contrary to the character of Christ which is the fruit of the Holy Spirit in the life of the believer (see Galatians 5:22-23). There is a reason why the Holy Spirit is called the Holy Spirit. Because He is Holy. Paul commands; do not grieve the Holy Spirit. Why? There are several reasons; not least because of who He is and what He does. The Holy Spirit seals us to the Day of Redemption. Paul has already told the Ephesians that the Holy Spirit is our down-payment or earnest of our inheritance (see Ephesians 1:13-14). Seals were given in the ancient world to indicate ownership or 5

6 possession. The Holy Spirit regenerates the believing sinner (see Titus 3:5; John 3:3-7; Ephesians 4:4-5; Colossians 2:12); indwells the Believer (Romans 6:3-4; 1 Corinthians 2:12; Romans 8:9; 1 John 3:24). The Spirit fills us (Acts 2:4); conforms us to the image of Christ (2 Corinthians 3:18); and strengthens us in our new nature (Ephesians 3:16). The Holy Spirit reveals Biblical truth to us (1 Corinthians 2:10). The Holy Spirit is able to fill our minds and our hearts and our mouths with appropriate words. In Mark 13:11 Jesus said; But when they arrest you and deliver you up do not worry beforehand, or premeditate what you will speak. But whatever is given you in that hour, speak that; for it is not you who speak, but the Holy Spirit. Instead of grieve the Spirit we must allow grace to fill our hearts. What does the Holy Spirit expect from us and what can we expect from each other? 31Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. Paul gives a short list or summary. We take off the old garments; we abandon our dirty diapers; we put on the appropriate garments and dress like Christ-followers. We take off those fallen and sinful vices and put on those virtues that make for godliness and righteousness in Christ. These ugly things break fellowship and destroy relationships. These sins left unchecked create harm and reek havoc on those for whom Christ died. Paul peeks inside our dirty diapers and sees Bitterness: This is the settled hostility that poisons the whole inner man (Wiersbe). Bitterness sets in when someone hurts you or injures you and you fail to forgive them. This is the spirit of irritability which leads to a venomous resentment. This is the spirit that refuses reconciliation. Wrath: This is explosive anger which we briefly touched on. It is a wild rage and a passion for the moment. Bitterness almost always leads to wrath. This is explosive anger vented for selfish reasons. This is the kind of anger that blows up and then blows by. But it still leaves a violent path of destruction like a hurricane. Anger: This is the slow burning fuse that smolders. This is the immature infant that nurses a grudge much like a baby who nurses a grudge. It is the same word that translates the legitimate anger spoken of in verse 26. What is the difference? This anger remains unresolved and then becomes uncontrolled. Evil Speaking: Blasphemia literally blasphemy or slander. These are words that injure. We might think of this as abusive language. This is the same word that is used in the Gospels to describe the abusive language or mocking of the multitudes when Christ was on the Cross (see Mark 15:29). 6

7 Malice: Don t forget to put off kakia the usual word for depravity a vicious disposition. This is the deep seated evil hatred that serves as the root for a variety of evil deeds. This is the emotion that gives you the courage to deliberately hurt someone. 32and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. We put off the old garments and put on the new garments. We put on those things that make for grace instead of grudges. How can we do less? Wuest translates this verse; and becoming kind but is this possible? How do we change? How can we become kind? Does God really expect a radical revolution? God know our heart and our frame. God makes allowance for us to grow and learn. We have the Holy Spirit in our lives. We can start the processes of putting away those things from our past and put on new things in our present. These are our tools to change the baby s diapers. Paul gives us three godly attitudes that we put on! Remember put on does not mean pretend. Put on is not possible unless the other things are put off. Kindness: We act with generosity and love the way God treats us in Christ. Tenderness: We are sensitive and sympathetic to the needs of others. Forgiveness: We extend to others grace and mercy (all who need it). Why should I? Because this is the way God has acted towards you in Christ. God made a way to forgive you before you ever existed before you knew the meaning of the words injury sin rebellion. Conclusion How do we grieve the Holy Spirit? We lie we lash out in anger, we steal, we use harmful and hurtful language! Lewis Sperry Chafer in his book; He That Is Spiritual identifies the key activity of truly spiritual people; They avoid grieving the Holy Spirit by confessing their sins to God. Have you been trapped or tripped up by some of these obstacles mentioned in our passage? 7