I Get No Respect. by Jeanie Crocker

Transcription

1 by Jeanie Crocker I Get No Respect Sometimes we all share the feeling of the late Rodney Dangerfield. It seems this generation has a serious lack of respect. This is especially glaring when dealing with drug addicts and alcoholics. The reason this is more noticeable among this particular group is due to their lack of SELF-respect. It all starts there. They witness others in their age group who have gone on to be successful in their fields, and it reminds them

2 constantly of their failure. It may be a brother or other family member who has chosen a different path. Their achievement only serves to increase the addict's misery and self-loathing. The result of this is quickly recognized when they come to us. Their immediate response upon arrival in our program is gratitude. At first they are so thankful to be rescued. It's like being rescued from the Titanic. While sitting in the lifeboat and watching the ship go down, there is relief and thankfulness that their life was spared. However, as life returns to a normal routine, they tend to lose this initial response. How quickly they forget and lose that feeling of gratitude. We call that "addiction amnesia." When the gratitude is gone, a whole new attitude takes its place. When self-respect is lacking, there is naturally no respect for anyone or anything else. This condition exhibits itself in the following behavior: 1. Apartments that have been carefully prepared for them are trashed practically overnight.

3 2. Apartment furnishings, which do not belong to them, are abused, broken and often stolen or sold to buy drugs. 3. Rules that have been made for their protection are broken without a thought. 4. Smoking areas are disregarded, and cigarette butts are everywhere. 5. Vehicles whose monthly payments are a drain on the budget, become filthy and cluttered with trash. 6. Authority figures are addressed with total disrespect. When things don't go their way in a phone conversation, they will frequently hang up on the authority figure. 7. An attitude of entitlement is prevalent. The addict feels the world owes him for all the misery he has had to endure - even though it was the result of his own bad choices. When he is fortunate enough to land a job, he suddenly feels above the menial things of life. He is too busy working to clean his room or study his Bible lessons. His job becomes his

4 drug, and everything else becomes insignificant - including his eternal soul. Now you may be asking yourself, "Why do you devote your lives to working with the kind of people described above?" There are several answers to this question. Let's give them equal time here: 1. We can't judge others just because their sins are different from ours. In God's eyes, we are all in the same boat - "... all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23) 2. When Jesus was walking the earth, He was compassionate and showed love toward all mankind. He was accused of associating with sinners. Wouldn't He do the same thing if He were here physically today? 3. There are mothers and grandmothers who are weeping and begging for help for their sons. There are fathers who want to give up but continue to pray earnestly for a solution. There are wives who pray

5 and hope against hope that something can be done to help the man in her life and the father of her children. We hope to be an instrument God uses in answering those prayers. We consider this opportunity a privilege. 4. A quote heard often around here is, "He is not evil. He is sick." Although we do not accept the belief that addiction is genetic or a disease as such, we all must recognize that when the brain is under the influence of foreign substances, a person will do and say things he wouldn't normally do and say. It takes time for the brain to heal. 5. Each person has a soul whose value cannot be measured. During the aggravation and frustration of a normal day, we remind ourselves of this fact regularly. 6. To be like Jesus, we must love everyone with that love which wants only the best for them. That love isn't limited to the ones who are easy to love, but it includes the cranky ones who drive us crazy, the

6 hateful ones who cause us grief, and the pathetic ones who break our hearts. When all is said and done, this is the bottom line and our great challenge. We are invested in these men and will continue to follow their progress long after they have left this program. 7. Knowing how God demonstrated His love by giving His Son for each of us serves to give the selfrespect that is lacking. This understanding takes time to sink into a heart that has been living in the far country, but it has the power to change the vilest of sinners who will accept that love in humble obedience. Going back to the Titanic illustration, we realize with many who come to our program, we are just rearranging the deck furniture on the Titanic. Yes, sadly, many are destined to go down in spite of all our best efforts. Sometimes we feel like we are ministering to lepers who will never get better but still require our constant care. This work is fraught with

7 heartbreak and disappointments. But in the midst of all that - one will rise to the top. One will want help and be willing to do whatever it takes to achieve recovery. He continues to appreciate this opportunity, to do his studies, and grow in his spiritual life. There will be bumps in the road, but he will admit mistakes and accept the consequences. He will make efforts to rebuild broken relationships and step back into productive living again. He is a source of great encouragement to us and our reason to go on. Our prayer is for each of these men who struggle in this dark world of addiction. Each time a new one comes our way, we hope and pray he will be the one who makes it. Oh, that all of them could be the one.