Semi-Synthetic Christmas by Rachel Benjamin
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1 by Rachel Benjamin What Who When Wear (Props) Olivia is disappointed with the synthetic Christmas trees at the tree lot, when she runs into a friend who seems to be having a synthetic Christmas. Themes: Focus, Priorities, Jesus is the Reason for the Season Olivia Salesman Mary Present; Christmas Actors are dressed for winter To create a Christmas tree lot, simply set up a few different types of fake Christmas trees. Have a sign that says Smith s Tree Lot, or whatever name you d like to use. Why Matthew 6:33 How Time Dickens Festival can be substituted for something local that works for your audience. An idea is to play Christmas music softly under the dialogue as a Christmas tree lot would. Approximately 4 minutes Skit Guys, Inc. Only original purchaser is granted photocopy permission. All other rights reserved. Skit Guys is a trademark of Skit Guys, Inc. Printed in U.S.A.
2 Salesman greets Olivia as she enters. Can I help you? Yes. I m looking for a Christmas tree. You ve come to the right place! All of our trees are 10% off from now until Christmas. Any particular style you re looking for? Tall, full, I don t know. I think I like the softer needles better. It doesn t really matter as long as it s a real tree. Of course. There s nothing like the smell of a real Christmas tree. What about this one here? Yeah it looks nice. Wait what about that one? Absolutely. That s a beautiful tree. It smells wonderful. Just like Christmas. We specialize in the evergreen scented trees. What? WERMARK And feel those needles. Nice and soft. Took us years to master those! But they feel great don t they. (Confused) Yeah. They do. You can water it right down here. How much water does it take a day? Well, this one won t actually soak up the water, but we have ones that are slightly higher priced that will absorb water slowly. Wait. 2
3 If a tree that absorbs water is really important to you, but you don t want to spend the extra amount, you can sign up for our weekly and get an additional 10% off the sale price. I m confused. I thought trees needed water to survive. You re absolutely right. (pause) So, can I bale this tree for you? (Inspects the tree closely) Is this a real tree? Real is a subjective word. It is? It smells real. It feels real. It looks real. But it s plastic isn t it? Plastic isn t the term we prefer to use. What do you call it? This is a REAL semi-synthetic polymerization Christmas tree. Interesting. Mary enters. WERMARK Mary: Olivia! Mary, hi! What are you doing here? Mary: Buying a Christmas tree. Aren t you? Well, I wanted a real Christmas tree. Mary: But they look real. They feel real. But they re not. Mary: Hey, let me steal you for a minute. Did you get my text about Thursday? Your Christmas party. 3
4 Mary: Can you come? I don t think so. My schedule is packed this week. Lunch with my dad, shopping with my mom, the Dickens Festival with my sisters, I don t have time to breathe. And I really wanted to make it to the service Thursday night. Why don t you come with me? You use to love coming to church with me. Mary: I just can t fit in all that religious stuff anymore. I simply don t have enough room in my Christmas schedule for Jesus birthday. Can t do everything, right? What? Christmas without Jesus isn t really Christmas. Mary: Says who? How do you celebrate the birth of the Savior without Jesus? Mary: I can go shopping, make Christmas cookies, sing carols, all without celebrating Jesus. But those are just extras. The shopping- Mary: Feels like Christmas. Ok. But the cookies- WERMARK Mary: Taste like Christmas. The carols- Mary: Sound like Christmas. But they re not Christmas. It s like this tree. It feels real, it smells real, it looks real, but it s plastic. Plastic is such a harsh word. Fine! Semi-synthetic polymerization tree. Whatever! They re not REAL. Just like Christmas without Jesus isn t really Christmas. Real is a subjective word. Mary: It is? Maybe Christmas is a subjective word too. I ve always thought it was. Would you like to look at a Christmas tree? 4
5 Mary: Yes! I ve always wanted a real tree that doesn t shed. You ve come to the right place. (to Olivia) Would you like me to bale this one for you? No, thanks. I m going to hold out for the real thing. Salesman and Mary exit stage right. Olivia exits stage left. The End WERMARK 5
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