Freedom to Marry 101: What s it all about?

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1 Freedom to Marry 101: What s it all about? Adult Study for ELCA Congregations 1 Cultural and political context Recent years have brought about a rapid shift in societal understanding of same- gender relationships and marriage. At least fourteen states and the District of Columbia now recognize same- gender marriages. 2 In June 2013, the United States Supreme Court struck down a portion of the federal Defense of Marriage Act that limited the definition of marriage to one man and one woman. Following that decision, the federal government has recognized legal same- gender marriages for purposes of federal benefits and responsibilities (for example, immigration, federal taxes, social security, and veteran s benefits). Public opinion has also shifted, with a majority now in favor of allowing all committed couples to marry, with the greatest support among the youngest voters. 3 As gay people have become more visible in society, the issue of same- gender marriage becomes less an abstract political or theological issue, and more a consideration of whether a dear family member or friend should also be allowed the freedom to marry the person they love. Why are we talking about this at church? Most of the opposition to allowing same- gender couples to marry is presented in religious terms. As a result, it s important for people of faith to consider how their religious beliefs inform their thinking on the issue of marriage, and whether the freedom to marry should encompass all loving, committed couples, including same- gender couples. Even people who do not identify with a faith look to people of faith for moral guidance on social issues what do we, as people of faith, have to say about the freedom to marry? How do Lutherans understand the Bible? This study is not designed to be an extensive study of specific Biblical texts about marriage or homosexuality. (If you are interested in further study, the What Next? section at the end of this study has several good suggestions.) However, it is helpful to be reminded of how Lutherans generally understand and use Scripture. 1 This study was developed by the Oregon Synod. With permission, it has been slightly adapted for use in contexts outside of Oregon. See marry for additional helpful resources. 2 As of April 2014, The following jurisdictions recognize same- gender marriages: California, Connecticut, Delaware, District of Columbia, Hawaii, Illinois, Iowa, Massachusetts, Maine, Maryland, Minnesota, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Rhode Island, Vermont, Washington. 3 See for most current polling results. 1

2 First and most importantly, Lutherans read and understand the Bible through the lens of the good news of Jesus Christ. [HSGT p.1-2] 4 Jesus invites us to love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind and love your neighbor as yourself on these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. Matthew 22: The over- arching theme of the love and acceptance of God as demonstrated over and over again by Jesus during his life and ministry has moved us beyond a stance of personal judgment of one another and into acceptance of all people based in love and respect. Second, Lutherans bring all of our knowledge, learning, and reasoning to the reading of Scripture. We believe that God provides insights to us through reason, imagination, the social and physical sciences, cultural understanding, and the creative arts (Philippians 4:8). One reason Lutherans... engage so deeply in education and research is that we believe God works through such means to guide us in reading Scripture and in understanding how we will live in a world of continuing complexity and change. [HSGT p.10] This includes looking closely at the historical context and intent of Scriptural texts. How do Lutherans think about marriage? The ELCA s social statement, Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust, adopted at the church- wide assembly in 2009, includes a lengthy discussion of marriage, including how it relates to same- gender couples. This statement was the product of several years of study, discernment, and engagement. The social statement defines marriage as a covenant of mutual promises, commitment, and hope authorized legally by the state and blessed by God. [HSGT p.15] The statement goes on to explain: Lutherans have long affirmed that the public accountability of marriage, as expressed through a legal contract, provides the necessary social support and social trust for relationships that are intended to be sustained throughout life and within changing and often challenging life situations. In this country, pastors carry both legal and religious responsibility for marriage. [HSGT p.15] Discussion: This statement expresses the important support marriage offers to couples in creating lifelong loving relationships and weathering difficult challenges. Does the church have an interest in applying this "relationship glue" to families in same- gender relationships as well as those in opposite- gender relationships? Does society? How might children in families with same- gender parents benefit if their parents were married? 4 The ELCA s Social Statement on Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust [HSGT] page numbers reference the pdf version of the statement available at WE- BELIEVE/SOCIAL- ISSUES/SOCIAL- STATEMENTS/JTF- HUMAN- SEXUALITY.ASPX. ELCA social statements are theological and teaching documents. They assist the ELCA and its members to reach informed judgments on social issues from a perspective of faith. They are intended to cultivate reflection, discussion, and moral formation. They govern this church s institutional policy in terms of its social witness and guide its work as a public church. Social statements are developed through an extensive process of deliberation involving the whole church and are adopted by a two- thirds majority of a church- wide assembly. Executive Summary, Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust. 2

3 Discussion: The Lutheran understanding of marriage sees a role for the church and a role for the state. What is the role of the state in authorizing and sustaining a marriage? What is the role of the church in blessing and sustaining a marriage? Within the ELCA is a range of conscience- bound beliefs about whether the church should bless the unions of same- gender couples. Some congregations and pastors perform blessing/wedding services for same- gender couples and some congregations and synods call pastors who are in lifelong monogamous same- gender relationships. Other congregations, pastors and synods decline to do so. The social statement on Human Sexuality explains the church s historical understanding of marriage. The historic Christian tradition and the Lutheran Confessions have recognized marriage as a covenant between a man and a woman, reflecting Mark 10: 6 9: "But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one put asunder." (Jesus here recalls Genesis 1:27; 2:23 24.) [HSGT p.15] The church's historical experience supports its confidence that solemn promises, made before a company of witnesses who ask for God's blessing on a man and a woman, have the power to create a unique framework within which two people, a new family, and the community may thrive. Consistent with that experience, this church has confidence that such promises, supported by the contractual framework of civil law, can create a lifetime relationship of commitment and cooperation. [HSGT p.18] Many within the church think this historical understanding is the beginning, rather than the end, of the church s understanding of marriage. They believe that a contemporary understanding of marriage may include similar same- gender relationships: Within the last decades, this church has begun to understand and experience in new ways the need of same- gender- oriented individuals to seek relationships of lifelong companionship and commitment as well as public accountability and legal support for those commitments. At the same time, public debates and deliberations have continued regarding understandings of human sexuality in medicine, social science, and corresponding public policy about same- gender relationships. [HSGT p.18] Recognizing that this conclusion differs from the historic Christian tradition and the Lutheran Confessions, some people, though not all, in this church and within the larger Christian community, conclude that marriage is also the appropriate term to use in describing similar benefits, protection, and support for same- gender couples entering into lifelong, monogamous 3

4 relationships. They believe that such accountable relationships also provide the necessary foundation that supports trust and familial and community thriving. [HSGT p.18] Discussion: How has your thinking on marriage changed or not changed over time? How have your personal experiences affected your thinking about marriage? Discussion: What s in a name? How does society (and how do you) view marriage differently from some other legal arrangement? Discussion: The initiative protects the right of congregations and clergy to refuse to perform marriages. How does this impact your thinking about legalizing civil marriage while allowing congregations and clergy the freedom to allow or not allow blessing/wedding of same- gender couples? What consensus do Lutherans hold concerning same- gender relationships? While Lutherans hold various convictions regarding lifelong, monogamous, same- gender relationships, this church is united on many critical issues. 24 It opposes all forms of verbal or physical harassment and assault based on sexual orientation. It supports legislation and policies to protect civil rights and to prohibit discrimination in housing, employment, and public services. It has called upon congregations and members to welcome, care for, and support same- gender couples and their families and to advocate for their legal protection. [HSGT p.19] The ELCA will support familial relationships as central to nurturing and sustaining trust and security in human relationships. It will advocate for public policies that support and protect families. This church commits itself to continued attention to and discernment about changing family configurations and the ways they serve to shelter and protect relationships of mutual trust. [p. 24] At the church- wide assembly in 2013, the assembly 5 affirmed the commitment made in the social statement Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust for pastoral responsibility to all children of God, recognizing familial relationship as central to nurturing and sustaining trust and security in human relationships and to advocate for public policies that support and protect families. The assembly invite[d] and encourage[d] conversations and resource sharing among congregations and church leaders on changing family configurations and their impact on society and the ministry of the church. The assembly called for additional work on appropriate steps in carrying out these commitments to pastoral care for same- gender couples and their families. Discussion: How are we welcoming, caring for and supporting same- gender couples and their families? Discussion: How are we advocating for the legal protection and support of same- gender couples and their families? 5 Resolution on Ministering to Same- Gender Couples and Their Families, ASSEMBLY ACTION: CA , Legislative Update from 2013 Church- wide Assembly August 14,

5 Discussion: Following the 2008 passage of California s Proposition 8 to restrict marriage to one man/one woman (later overturned by the courts), polling showed that 40% of members of welcoming and affirming congregations voted to prohibit same- gender couples from marrying. Why do you think this happened? What is the role of the church in discussing and advocating for changing civil laws? How does the church view advocacy on issues of public policy? The ELCA Constitution recognizes that the church is called to advocate for justice in the world. The Church is a people created by God in Christ, empowered by the Holy Spirit, called and sent to bear witness to God s creative, redeeming, and sanctifying activity in the world. ELCA Constitution To participate in God s mission, this church shall:... Serve in response to God s love to meet human needs, caring for the sick and the aged, advocating dignity and justice for all people, working for peace and reconciliation among the nations, and standing with the poor and powerless and committing itself to their needs. ELCA Constitution 4.02(c). To fulfill these purposes, this church shall:... Study social issues and trends, work to discover the causes of oppression and injustice, and develop programs of ministry and advocacy to further human dignity, freedom, justice, and peace in the world. ELCA Constitution 4.03(l). How does the state view church advocacy on issues of public policy? Specifically, what effect does political advocacy have on our tax- exempt status? Churches, like other non- profit organizations, are generally exempt from federal income tax under IRC 501(c)(3). Churches jeopardize that status if they become involved in a partisan way in a political campaign for an elected office. However, churches do not jeopardize that tax- exempt status by engaging in educational activities about issues of public policy. Churches may even engage in lobbying efforts in an effort to influence the vote on legislation or a ballot issue, provided the lobbying activity does not rise to a substantial part of its overall activities. IRS Tax Guide for Churches and Religious Organizations. Discussion: Does your church discuss issues of public policy? How has the discussion or lack or discussion shaped the character of your congregation? Discussion: Does your church engage in any advocacy on issues of public policy? How has this shaped the character of your congregation? What next? We want to study some more. As part of developing the social statement Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust, excellent resources on Lutheran theology and understanding of scripture related to sexuality, including marriage, were prepared. Both the social statement and the Journey Together Faithfully study resources are available for download at the ELCA website. WE- BELIEVE/SOCIAL- ISSUES/SOCIAL- STATEMENTS/JTF- HUMAN- SEXUALITY/RESOURCES.ASPX 5

6 Many congregations have found Walter Wink s study on Homosexuality and the Bible to be a helpful personal and congregational resource. The study is available online or for purchase at minimal cost from the Fellowship of Reconciliation website. BIBLE- WALTER- WINK. Bishop Dave Brauer- Rieke s Bible studies on the Bible and homosexuality are available online on the Oregon Synod webpage at These studies can be used for personal study or group discussion: o Hope, Homosexuality and Hospitality is a Bible study looking at verses some understand to condemn homosexuality. o Where Hope and History Collide: Explosions of Grace is a more proactive look at our Christian witness and the Gospel's welcome to people of all sexual orientations. Congregations grappling with how to talk about public policy issues in a healthy way may find helpful the study Talking Together as Christians about Tough Social Issues available at WE- BELIEVE/SOCIAL- ISSUES/SOCIAL- STATEMENTS/JTF- HUMAN- SEXUALITY/RESOURCES/TALKING- TOGETHER- AS- CHRISTIANS- ABOUT- TOUGH- SOCIAL- ISSUES.ASPX. Check out the Oregon Synod website at MARRY/ for additional resources. We re interested in learning more and providing a space to invite others into the conversation. Attend and/or host a two- hour forum for members, neighboring congregations, or the larger community. Arrange a showing of a film with time for discussion. Two good possibilities are: o Love Free or Die (2012), an 82- minute film about the life and ministry of Gene Robinson, the first openly gay person to become a bishop in the historic tradition of Christendom. Available streaming or on DVD from Netflix. o Anyone and Everyone (2007), a 57- minute documentary about real families of various cultures discussing the impact of a family member coming out as gay or lesbian. See for more information. This study is presented by the Portland Metro Chapter of ReconcilingWorks Task Force for Freedom to Marry primary authors: Marja Selmann and Gretchen Brauer- Rieke. Adapted with permission by ReconcilingWorks: Lutherans for Full Participation. Contact: oregonlutheransformarriage@gmail.com 6