Revitalizing Relationships, Part IV: Shields of Fear or Hearts of Faith? Weyburn Free Methodist Church 2017

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Eileen Maria Hines
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1 Revitalizing Relationships, Part IV: Shields of Fear or Hearts of Faith? Weyburn Free Methodist Church 2017

2 Why we fight James 4:1 makes it simple. He says What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don t they come from your desires that battle within you?

3 The heart has human needs To be unconditionally loved

4 The heart has human needs To be significant or to make an impact

5 Our deepest wounds occur in our closest relationships We are wounded by our parents, by our families, by our friends. David said in Psalms 109:22 For I am poor and needy, and my heart is wounded within me. We are NOT unconditionally loved We are frequently NOT recognized or valued for our work, our gifts or our abilities BUT it doesn t stop us from needing or desiring

6 Unmet needs or desires create fear, and then we self-protect Genesis 15: 1 After this, the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision: Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward. Abraham, the father of faith, the friend of God feared! And because of it tried to protect himself and provide for himself.

7 Abraham s need for signifigance Genesis 20: Now Abraham moved on from there into the region of the Negev and lived between Kadesh and Shur. For a while he stayed in Gerar, 2 and there Abraham said of his wife Sarah, She is my sister. Then Abimelek king of Gerar sent for Sarah and took her Abraham replied, I said to myself, There is surely no fear of God in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife. Abrahams fear resulted in wounding his wife and in threatening his future

8 The things men desire and fear Men desire security and financial wellbeing but fear poverty, of not having enough, of not being enough to accomplish it Men desire significance but fear failure, of being disrespected, of losing their reputation, Men desire intimacy but fear not measuring up, not being enough for their wife or their family

9 Sarah s need for priority Genesis 16: 1 Now Sarai, Abram s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; 2 so she said to Abram, The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her. Genesis 21: 9 But Sarah saw that the son whom Hagar the Egyptian had borne to Abraham was mocking, 10 and she said to Abraham, Get rid of that slave woman and her son, for that woman s son will never share in the inheritance with my son Isaac. Sarah s fear of conflict and rejection resulted in her rejecting her husband s child, and creating conflict for generations to come.

10 The things women desire and fear To be cherished and prioritized but fear abandonment of being left with all the responsibility and being overwhelmed and spent. To be welcomed and included but fear rejection, of not being beautiful enough, sexy enough, of being replaced. To love her children but fear messing up her kids, of feeling guilty, of being responsible for their bad choices or unhappy life

11 Our SHIELDS How we self protect ANGER: Raise our voices, make demands, threaten, swear SHAME: remind them of their errors, bring in past failures, humiliate SELF-PITY: tears, guilt, manipulation, extended sadness WITHDRAWAL: Walk out, avoid, stop talking, the silent treatment, refuse to discuss it. Shields create distance and continue to wound the other creating greater need

12 God is aware of these desires and our fears LOVE John 31:33 I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself BELONGING Ephesians 1:5 God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. SIGNIFICANCE: - Eph. 3:12 Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God s presence. Romans 12: gifts, abilities, talents, callings

13 Exercise Faith in God God is our source. GOD

14 God knows our needs, our deepest desires Psalm 68: 5,6 Father to the fatherless, defender of widows this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families; he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy. Husband to the husbandless. Father to the fatherless

15 Lay down your shields Acknowledge your fears Psalms 34:4 - I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. Psalms 37:4 Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of your heart.

Lesson 8 Genesis 16 and 17

Lesson 8 Genesis 16 and 17 First IBS Division: Genesis 16:1-16 Hagar and Ishmael 1 Now Sarai, Abram s wife, had borne him no children. But she had an Egyptian slave named Hagar; 2 so she said to Abram, The Lord has kept me from