Overcoming Loneliness, Negativity and Greed: Philippians

Transcription

1 Overcoming Loneliness, Negativity and Greed: Philippians From the Series: Prison PASTOR MARK BATTERSON Good to see you guys! I love National Community Church. I love gathering together and I want to say a huge hello to all five of our locations, Ebenezers Coffeehouse, Union Station, Ballston Common Mall, Georgetown and Kingstowne. It is exciting to gather together. This weekend, we are wrapping up a series on Philippians called Prison and last weekend we talked about the prison of our own good deeds. Another name for that is called legalism, and then we talked about the prison of our past mistakes and the way through confession and God s forgiveness, we can be set free and be in right relationship with Him. This weekend, we are going to continue. Now, you know that Paul wrote this book from prison. We are talking about some of the prisons we find ourselves in and that this book helps us get our way out of. You can turn to Philippians Chapter 4, starting in verse 1. Therefore, my brothers, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, that is how you should stand firm in the Lord, dear friends! I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you, loyal yokefellow, help these women who have contended at my side in the cause of the gospel, along with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life. Now let me stop right there and make an observation. I don t know if you ve picked up on this as we ve been reading through Philippians, but there are a lot references to relationships. Paul mentions people by name, a lot of people by name. Did you notice he calls them brothers and sisters? The family language, it is so obvious that Paul knows these people and deeply cares about them. I think there is a relational thread in this book that if we aren t careful, we can totally miss it, but I want to talk about it for a moment. I think that one of the prisons that many of us who live in the Washington D.C. area find ourselves in is the prison of loneliness. I think there is a very simple reason for that. Most of us aren t from here. Most of us are from someplace else. I read this week that 40 million Americans move every year. Did you know this? We are a very mobile society, that s all good, but the challenge with that is this a hundred years ago, chances are you d be living near your family. But we live in a society now where there are a couple of dangers. One is that you can fall in with the wrong crowd and it can take you down the wrong path. The second danger is that when you find yourself in a tough spot, you don t always have the family support structure right there for you. And if you re going through a tough time, it can be difficult if you don t have the relationships you need to support you. That s why I think one of our primary functions as a church, and it is one of the metaphors that Paul uses in the New Testament for the church is that we are a spiritual family. For some of you who are here maybe doing an internship or in college, we re kind of a church away from church, but we are a spiritual family, if you will. I think that is incredibly significant because what I want you to hear this weekend is that it is not just about the messages, not just about the worship or our outreaches or the mission trips, it s about the relationships, building relationships with each other. And that s why we really have a two-fold purpose as a church, to help you connect with God and also to connect with others. This is interesting. Social scientists tell us that 70% of happiness is difficult to quantify but 70% is the byproduct of relationships, yet a lot of us look in a lot of different places for happiness and will often look at money, thinking that might solve all our problems. Or we look at a job or a hobby or an accomplishment, if we could do this or be there, that somehow that would change our life. Listen, really what it boils down to is relationship. That s why we spend so much time and energy at NCC trying to help you build relationships.

2 On the way in this weekend, you got a small group atlas. You are going to hear this a lot in the next couple of weeks. We are going to ask you to prayerfully read through this guide because it will help you find some people, a group to connect with, and I m confident that that may be the thing you need the most. So we want to encourage you to read through that atlas and find some relationships. I hope you make it all the way through Philippians 4 but I ve got to share this. I find it really interesting, and in light of the fact that our series in titled Prison, this study seems apropos. I was reading a book by Alan Deutschman called Change or Die and in the book he sites a study published by the Justice Department in 2002 that tracked 272,111 inmates after they were released from state prisons in 15 states. It s the largest study of its kind ever done. Honestly, the findings were discouraging because they found that 30% of former inmates were re-arrested within six months, and two-thirds were re-arrested within three years. Something is not working. With that as a backdrop, consider this. One of the chapters Deutschman devotes to a non-profit called The Delaney Street Foundation in San Francesco. It is a halfway house of sorts, about 500 inmates that live together, their own community, and essentially, Delancey helps these prisoners complete their high school education, and they all learn three marketable skills and they use them in the business that Delancey has started. They have the top-rated moving company in the Bay area, they run an upscale restaurant, they have a bookstore café and a print shop, among some other businesses. Here s what s amazing. While taxpayers are spending about $40,000 a year supporting a single prison inmate, Delancey is self-supporting on the profit it makes from its businesses. It has never taken money from the government. Not every inmate makes it, but after staying at Delancey for four years, 60% of these former inmates go on to lead productive lives as law-abiding citizens. So in the justice system, we re losing about two-thirds, Delancey about six out of ten turn out good. So really the $64,000 question is what are they doing? There are a lot of factors. The education piece, teaching skills, but here s what was absolutely fascinating to me all the inmates are put into a small group! Small group of ten with their fellow inmates. It is not a hierarchical system, they are accountable to each other, and they also teach each other. They have this motto: Each one teach one. So if you can read on a 6 th grade level, you re probably going to teach someone who can read on a 4 th grade level and learn from someone who can read on an 8 th grade level. And the groups meet three times a week. It is actually based on minions. It s a Jewish tradition that ten members of the congregation may join together and hold a prayer service without the leadership of a formally educated or ordained rabbi. That was the inspiration for it. So, they are in these small groups, they live together, they learn together, they work together and after studying Delancey, this is the conclusion that Alan Deutschman comes to changing your own life often means changing your community. Most of us think that we need to break old habits and create new habits, and that is certainly one way that we experience change, but he says that really, if you look at it, you re probably going to have to sever some old relationships and create some new relationships if you really want to experience lasting change in your life. You ve got to surround yourself with the right people So that s what Delancey has done, created a new community. I think what I m trying to get at is this small groups are important. It doesn t matter whether you are an inmate or a roommate or a mate, what matters is that you have got to be intentional about putting yourself in the right communities, having the right relationships. A relationship with Christ is not a solo flight. Isn t it interesting that Jesus surrounded Himself with 12 disciples? Doing life together, ministry together. That is why we put so much time and energy into this. For some of you, you are lonely, and it is so hard taking that first step. You might have to visit a couple of groups and it might take a couple of weeks, but if you really can muster up the courage, say I m going to do something about this, I believe you will find some new relationships that will make a huge difference in your life. I pray that you would come out of that prison of loneliness and surround yourself. Yes, it takes a measure of courage to go visit a group, but you need to visit a group and get plugged in and it will help you grow spiritually. Let s keep going. Verse 4. I think there is another prison that Paul talks about here. You could give it a couple of names, but I think it qualifies as the prison of negativity. Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and

3 petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Don t you love the Bible! This is amazing stuff! This advice is anointed and it s on a very practical level. It doesn t matter whether you are a Christian or not, you could put this into practice and it would change your life. Recently, I read a study that was done with college students. It consisted of two questions. By the way, welcome back all of our college students. Question number one was how happy are you? Question number two was how many dates did you have in the last month? I love this study! Here s the deal, the researchers actually found a pretty weak correlation between the level of happiness and the number of dates. Then they flipped the questions. How many dates have you had in the last months? Then the follow-up question was how happy are you? All of a sudden, there was a very strong correlation between those two things. The sequence of questions created a focus. Now, psychologists called this a focusing allusion, but here s how I would summarize it, this is one of our core values as a family, I m saying this to my kids all the time and saying it to myself too your focus determines your reality. Let me bring it down to where we live because I think we ve got to break it down and look in the mirror and reflect on our lives. You can be perfectly content with what you have, but one trip to the mall can ruin all that. You start shopping and all of a sudden, you need this and you need that. Why? Because malls are created to create a level of dissatisfaction with what you have. And you can feel like you are making a fashion statement but then you go to the mall and next thing you know, you feel like you need an entirely new wardrobe. I call it the mall effect. What happens is you become focused on what you don t have, and more often than not, if we aren t aware of it, it produces materialism in our lives, so we spend a lot of money on things we probably shouldn t. Now, let me flip the coin and talk about the mission trip effect. We have a team in the Dominican Republic right now and we will shortly send 45 NCCers to Ethiopia; we ve got a team going to Uganda to build an orphanage, you know, ten trips, ten months, huge part of our heartbeat as a church. If you ve ever been to a third-world country, you know the effect that it has. All of a sudden, you are so grateful for the things that you take for granted on a daily basis. One of my most poignant mission trip memories happened a few years ago, I ve been to Ethiopia several times, but on one particular trip, on one particular day, we build a mud hut for an Ethiopian grandmother. It was an amazing experience. All day, physically exhausted, we mixed the mud with our feet and we threw the mud with our hands and so, yours truly was mud-colored and smelled like mud, it wasn t pretty. So when we got back to the little compound where we were staying, you can imagine everybody on the team took a shower. But there wasn t any hot water. It was one of the most painful showers I have ever taken. Something happened when I got home, I ll never forget it, first shower I took, I had revival in the shower! That doesn t sound right does it? I literally remember, for the first time in my life, thanking the Lord for hot water heaters! See, because if you focus on what you don t have, you will never be happy. Paul knows that. But if you focus on what you do have, that s why verse 8 is just such good truth. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think about such things. Can we get practical? You know that what I m saying is true, right? Let s try to break it down, the bottom line is this, if you listen to a message and don t do anything with it, you end up more frustrated because now there is simply more truth that you aren t applying to your life.

4 So, here are three simple ways I think we can put this into practice. Number one, real simple idea, especially if you struggle with being negative or maybe a critical spirit, some of us struggle with this. Keep a gratitude journal. I ve done this over the years, I think it is so healthy, by the way, motivated by Psalm 118: This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it. Get up and make a decision, what am I grateful for today. I ve found that when I am keeping a gratitude journal, it sets the tone for my day, it sets the tone for my life. I was thinking about it, because the first time I ever did this, Laura and I did it together as a New Year s resolution, we would each find things we were grateful for and then we would compare notes at the end of the day, it was a great exercise as a couple. For some weird reason, this is one of my memories; we were back in Chicago visiting family, we were on the Eisenhower driving into the city and there is a spot where 294 connects to the Eisenhower and it is a bottleneck and your blood pressure automatically goes up when you hit that spot and you re stuck in this traffic and we were trying to get to family and we were so frustrated, and I don t know why I remember this or why I m sharing it, but I remember one of my gratitudes at the end of the day was that we didn t get into a car accident today. [quiet pause] Your response is a huge letdown. My point is, when you re frustrated about something, you still need a reality check. Is our country in the midst of some economic strife? Yes, I don t think there s anybody that owns a house who hasn t lost equity in your house, if you re in the stock market, certainly your portfolio is not worth as much now as it was six months ago, if it is, tell me who your money manager is! There are a lot of people who lost jobs this week, so there is a reality happening here, but we still need a reality check. How blessed are we financially, materially as a country, as a people, when you consider average monthly income, we are wealthy beyond words. So I still think we need a reality check. I think behavior scientists say it usually takes about 21 days to establish a habit, keep a gratitude journal for 21 days. Just an idea, a thought, if this is where you struggle, put this into practice, go for it. Let me talk about a second way that I think we can get out of this prison of negativity. These are so basic but you never outgrow it. How about starting your day by reading your Bible, because again, it sets the tone. I m reading through a one-year Bible this year, Parker and I together, it has been so good for me. You might think that because I m a pastor, I don t struggle with this, are you kidding? My danger is that I can just study for the sermon I m preaching instead of what God wants to say to you, it s about what God wants to say through you, and the moment you get there, you start shriveling up in your spirit. Let me put it in financial terms. If you don t make a deposit in the morning, what do you have to withdraw? You need to deposit something in your spirit because if you don t, you don t have anything to give, and guess who suffers the price? The people around you. You ve got to get on God s wavelength. Maybe here s another way of saying it because my fear is that some of us have heard this so many times, you know this, my goal is not to make you feel guilty because you re not doing it, we are way past that. My goal is that somehow we can think about this in a new way. I love the verse in Hebrews, and there s an old song too, fix your eyes on Jesus, look full on His wonderful face, from Hebrews. Think of the Bible as the picture of God. Isn t that what it is? Collective snapshots that give us a composite picture of who God is. How do we look at God? We look into His Word and it gives us a picture of who He is. And when we do that, there is something in our spirit that we can give to someone else, and it creates some positive energy at the beginning of the day. Let me talk about one more. It is listed in this passage prayer. Do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and petition with Thanksgiving present your requests to God, and the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus. I know, easier said than done. In everything, by prayer and petition. I don t know how people how don t pray or don t believe in prayer or don t know how to pray or don t believe there is someone to pray to, I honestly don t know how they make it because like is beyond me and I think of prayer as a pressure valve, in a sense, that when I m going through something relationally, spiritually, emotionally that I can t handle, I need that pressure valve. And what it says here is that prayer is the way we turn our anxiety or we turn our stress or our fear or our guilt, it is spiritual jujitsu, you take all of these negative things in your life and you convert them into prayer. So simple here, but what if all of us learned to simply convert every situation, like you re watching the news or looking at your calendar preparing for the meetings of the day, what if we just

5 converted all of that into prayer? How would that transform our lives? Again, the keep this on ground level, let me share one little story. When Parker was a baby, he had colic. If you ve ever had a colic baby, bless you with a double blessing. Doctors don t really know what causes colic, there are different theories but the problem is that there is not a magic pill, so the bottom line is, the first six months, Parker was crying. As first time parents, I remember being so raw emotionally. Truth is, you have a little one, it s an adjustment, you are raw emotionally anyway, and I remember it being such a struggle and we couldn t get him to stop crying. Maybe this will help some random parent, but the only thing that worked is that in some weird way, we discovered that running bath water, we would go into the bathroom and turn on the bathtub full blast and somehow that noise had a soothing effect. It killed our water bill, but somehow it worked. Here s the other thing though, I don t know how to say this and I hope this is fair to my other children. I prayed for Parker, because when you re holding a little one who is crying for hours without end, that s all you ve got left. I would pace and pray and that little baby got prayed for so much. So in some weird way, I believe that God will answer those prayers in his life, because sometimes it s the negative, things that drive you crazy that force you to pray. Is there someone in your life that drives you crazy? You really only have two options. One, let them drive you crazy. Or two, pray for them. Is there someone that you can t look in the eye? You better start praying for them because it s the only way you are going to be able to look that person in the eye, because you ve got to purge your spirit and prayer will get you out of that negative prison that you are in. Let s talk about the prison of greed. This is really how the chapter ends. Paul ends the letter by thanking the Philippians for their generosity. Chapter 4, verse 14: Yet it was good of you to share in my troubles. Moreover, as you Philippians know, in the early days of your acquaintance with the gospel, when I set out from Macedonia, not one church shared with me in the matter of giving and receiving, except you only; for even when I was in Thessalonica, you sent me aid again and again when I was in need. Not that I am looking for a gift, but I am looking for what may be credited to your account. I have received full payment and even more; I am amply supplied, now that I have received from Epaphroditus the gifts you sent. They are a fragrant offering, an acceptable sacrifice, pleasing to God. And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen. Greet all the saints in Christ Jesus. The brothers who are with me send greetings. All the saints send you greetings, especially those who belong to Caesar s household. The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen. This is interesting to me, by the way, Philippians is really a thank you note. It is a thank you note to the church at Philippi for giving to Paul. A weird thought, I know, part of me wonders if the Philippians hadn t given to Paul, would Paul have written this book or would we be missing this book of the Bible. But the generosity of the Philippians prompted Paul to write this letter and because of their generosity, we actually have these words in our Scripture. This week, I spoke at my alma mater, Central Bible College, while I was there I met a missionary couple who spent 20 years in Central America, and I don t know how this came up but they told me about during their itineration when they were raising support to go to the mission field, a little boy gave them one dollar. I think the reason why they thought of it is because that little boy is now around 20-something and living in the D.C. area and hoped to point him in our direction. But what made it significant was that he didn t just give them a dollar, it was the birthday dollar he had gotten, and he wrote a note with it. It said this is my birthday dollar, I pray that you would use it to tell people about Jesus. Now, you would ve thought that this little boy had actually given them a million dollars and that he had given it to them yesterday. As I stood there, I was thinking, this was 20 years ago and it s a buck. But you wouldn t believe how this one gift had a huge impact on them. As I heard that, I couldn t help but think of Paul. I wonder if this is how Paul felt about the Philippians, like no one else helped me, no one else

6 supported me, no one else gave but you gave and it made all the difference in the world. So Paul, out of gratitude, writes to them to say thanks. Let me cut to the chase. I think one of the cages, one of the prisons that many of us find ourselves in is this prison of greed. We need to keep it real. It makes me think of the rich young ruler. In the story in the gospel, he encounters Jesus, he is wealthy, he is young, he has power, seems to have everything. On paper, this guy is good to go, but if you remember from the encounter, he says something interesting to Jesus, a very insightful question, he says, What am I still lacking? because you can have everything and still be missing something. And Jesus knew exactly what it was and He didn t pull any punches. He said, Sell everything you have and give it to the poor and then you will have treasure in heaven. And it says that the man because very sad when he heard this because he was a man of great wealth. I want you to hear what I m about to say. Your assets become liabilities if you don t use them for God s purposes. Blessings can very easily become curses. If you don t use the assets that God has given to you for his purposes, they will become liabilities in your life, and that s precisely what happens here, it was the rich young rulers wealth that kept him from the opportunity of a lifetime. I don t know but to put it in intern terms, an internship with Jesus on your resume has got to count for something. I mean, he has the opportunity to follow the Son of God, but he can t let go. I remember as a kid we watched this show called Wild Kingdom. There was one particular show where there were monkey trappers in Borneo I think and they used to trap these monkeys by hollowing out a gourd and put a little hole and put seeds inside and tie it to a stake and the monkeys would eventually come out of the jungles and they would put their hands inside to grab the seeds and once they got the seeds, the hole was too small, they couldn t get their hand back out. Then the monkey trappers would come back, and the monkeys would be screaming and dancing but the one thing they wouldn t do was let go. They wouldn t let go, so they were literally trapped by what they held onto. It is so true, this rich young ruler was trapped because he couldn t let go. What I want to tell you is that the things that you hold on to are the things that will imprison you if you don t learn to let go. So in the spirit of keeping it real, I have the potential for greed as great as anybody at any of our five locations. I am greedy by nature. I don t think there is a person that enough is enough. I don t think it s ever enough. What I have found financially is that the only antidote for greed in my life is to tithe. If I don t give God the first ten percent of what I make, Laura and I made that decision when we got married, but if we hadn t done it, greed would wrap itself around my heart and it would mess me up. I m so grateful, not just because I believe that God can do more with 90% than I can do with 100%, I believe that. The truth is, I want to give as much as I can to the kingdom of God because it is the only investment that really has eternal value, but beyond that, I m grateful because in some strange way, it gets me out of this prison of greed and makes my life about something more. Paul says something here that is interesting. He says, I m not asking you to give because I need it, I m asking you to give so that it will be credited to your account. There is a little mystery to this, like what account is he talking about? But I think on a very simple level, there is evidently some account where God is keeping track of what we invest in his kingdom. This shouldn t come as any surprise to us I don t think. So what are we giving to that account? Here s how I want to end this weekend and this series, as we gear up to launch our fifth location. Listen, we are going to keep advancing God s kingdom, we are going to see people come to faith in Christ, we are going to keep discipling people, we are going to keep doing what God has called us to do. Like I said last weekend, we want to give you an opportunity to be part of that, and I ll get there in just a moment. Today I stopped by a corner mart, I was thirsty, so I picked up a 20 ounce bottle of Coke and it got me thinking, so I did a Google search, and this is what I found. If you purchase one share of Coca-Cola stock in 1919 and simply held that one share, by the year 2000, it would have split into 4,608 shares and that original $40 investment, if you kept reinvesting the dividends would have been worth about 7 million dollars. By the way, if your great grandparents had purchased one of Asa Candler s shares in 1892, that $100 dollar investment would be worth 7.34 billion dollars. Dang! There is nothing like getting in on the ground level. Here s what I m saying, we definitely need a paradigm shift. This is not a pastor up here begging for

7 money. I ve simply learned the pure joy that you find on the giving end of life. If you focus on getting, you are going to be miserable. If you focus on giving, it will transform your life. Think about this, let me put it in terms of the kingdom of God. Have you ever wondered how Jesus supported Himself? He was a carpenter, but He gave up that, so He wasn t making any money. Or the disciples, they gave up fishing, so how did they? Well, in Luke Chapter 8, it says that Jesus traveled from one town to another proclaiming the Good News of the kingdom of God and the twelve were with Him and also some women who had been cured of evil spirits and diseases. Mary, called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had come out, Joanna the wife of Cusa, the manager of Herod s household, Susanna and many others, these women were helping to support them out of their own means. I think we ignore the financial dimensions of this story. They got in on the IPO, the initial public offering. They were the first shareholders in Jesus ministry. You want to talk about return on investment? Wow! Then Paul s ministry. Here s a guy who went on three missionary journeys, started dozens of churches and wrote 13 of the 39 books of the New Testament. How would you have liked to have been one of those Philippians who was a shareholder in that ministry? I am not equating our Kingstowne launch with Jesus ministry, but I would suggest that we are doing what He commanded us. And 2,000 years later, it s still all about advancing His kingdom and it is still an opportunity to invest in His kingdom. So what we re going to do this weekend to is worship God with our giving one more time. Last weekend we asked you to pray about it and think about it, if you are a guest, do not feel obligated to give, but I want to challenge every NCCer to be a shareholder. It doesn t matter how much or how little. Permission to speak frankly? [laughter] If it hurts a little, it will feel good, and if it doesn t, it won t. Laura and I prayerfully talked through this, our check is written, I m so excited about it, because I believe that the investment that we make will pay dividends with compounded interest for eternity. So would you prepare your hearts and your gifts. I m going to invite our worship teams to come and I invite our ushers to come and in just a moment, we are going to worship the Lord with the special offering for our Kingstowne launch and I want to lead us in prayer as we prepare. Father, thank You. We love You, we love your Word, thank You for saving us. God, thank You for giving us a spiritual family, a place where we can find relationship. God thank You for releasing us from this prison of negativity. Help us to count our blessings, help us to be in your Word, help us be in prayer so that sets the tone for our lives. Lord, I pray tonight that you would get us out of this prison of greed. Lord I know that some of us are there, we struggle with it, enough is never enough. I pray that we would have the courage to do something about it. Lord as we give these gifts to You, we pray that You would bless them, multiply them for your purposes, for your kingdom. God thank You for the amazing privilege of giving. I pray that not a person would give out of any kind of external pressure but out of a cheerful heart, we would give to You believing that these gifts we give are going to make a difference and advance your kingdom. For your glory, in Jesus Name, Amen.