MODULE FIVE. Forgiveness

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Della Benson
5 years ago
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MODULE FIVE Forgiveness When we speak about forgiveness, we need to include gratitude. They exist side by side. Two really powerful words and healers.

1 MODULE FIVE Forgiveness When we speak about forgiveness, we need to include gratitude. They exist side by side. Two really powerful words and healers. By working on those concepts alone, we are altering our whole reality of life. Truly transformational and life-altering inner work can be done by feeling the humbleness that comes with being grateful. When we are grateful, forgiveness is easy. They are both compassionate energies from the true source, from who we really are. Words are energy, and they all hold a frequency, an intent and a passion. When we feel gratitude it comes from our heart, and when we forgive someone, it comes from the heart also. One cannot will any of them with the mind. Practicing gratitude and forgiveness is the honoring of love and compassion. Love is the true healing energy, and it always starts with self-love. It always comes back to the self. We, us, you and me, as long as we really love ourselves, we will live life from a place of forgiveness and gratitude. Words are submissions of intent, and even when we are not aware, we are sending out a message to our cells, to the creation, to God or the Infinite. The energy of gratitude is a pure love energy. It is the vibration of constant positive change. Forgiving is the energy of self-love and compassion. It is also what shall set you free from emotional baggage. 1

2 When we forgive someone, we are putting the energy back where it belongs. By that I mean that we choose to not be the carrier of the event anymore. We refuse to be the one that is emotionally hurting because of what someone else did. The action was not ours, and the hurt or effect of what happened is not ours to keep living. When we are holding on to the memory, we are letting the event continue to hurt us, over and over again. So, you see forgiving is all about you, never about the other person. Once you realize this, letting go becomes so much easier. Every day moving forward has the choice of forgiveness. The blame and anger that comes with holding on will eat you up like any other acid. Just like the acids and alkaline foods, there are alkaline and acidic emotions. The anger, blame, sorrow, hopelessness and despair are all corrosive to our organism, and we need to let them be embraced and set free. Through forgiveness and gratitude love, compassion, thankfulness, joy and enthusiasm will grow and prosper. You might think that forgiving someone is the same as letting them off the hook and that what they did is now ok. That is not the case at all. You might also think that now that everything is forgiven, you will have to be friends with them again, or interact with them even. No, that is not at all what this is about. Forgiveness is not about validating any action or situation. It is not about making anything ok. This is the act of self-freedom and no longer owning the situation. You are no longer allowing it to hurt you. Trust might be broken and relationships might be over, and that is perfectly ok. Forgiveness is your gift to you, and your doorway to moving on. The very first step towards forgiveness is acknowledging that it needs to be done. The second step is knowing what it is and what it is not. Once you are ready, give yourself permission to move on with a compassionate heart. That is the heart-felt true you, and you are reclaiming every single bit of it. What is forgiveness and what is it not? Forgiving is the opposite of victimhood. By stopping the continuing blame and hurt, we are refusing to be a victim. We are reclaiming our power. We can forgive someone even if we will never see each other again. It is an act of energetic dis-connection. By holding on, it does not matter where the other person is, you are still connected by this blame. Keep walking alongside loving and caring people. Although one can forgive, it does not mean that it is ok to stay in any abusive relationship. Everyone is accountable for their actions. 2

3 Forgiveness is knowing that punishment and revenge is not up to you. We are not the ones in charge of justice. Karma is a cosmic law which means that there is always cause and effect. We do not need to worry about it, it is always taken care of. The act of forgiving is a choice that is completely yours alone. It is an act of power and sovereignty. You are stepping up to your highest potential. Forgiving never means that things will stay the same quite the opposite, it means you will move on without anything holding you down. No matter what happens, how tragic or seemingly horrible, forgiveness is a process that can start right away. It is ok that it might take time. Grant yourself the time that you need, without indulging in it. There are many meditation and visualization techniques that can help you during this process. Forgiveness does not mean that you are denying what happened, not at all. Sometimes the offender does not even know he or she did something to hurt another, and sometimes doing one s best just was not ok at the time. Forgiveness does not have anything to do with repent. Remember, it is not about them, always about you and me. We are walking the path of love and healing, which holds no place for degenerating, debilitating anger and despair. It has nothing to do with their attitude, only with yours. They might be totally unaware that you are going through this process. They might not even know that they need your forgiveness. They do not at all need to be a part of your healing journey, so this is absolutely something that you can do all by yourself. Withholding forgiveness is like trying to hold on to pain and power at the same time. Holding it back might give a sense of power over the whole situation. It is the kind of perceived power that will eat you up over time, as it is not true power, it is fear of letting go. We are not looking for the forgive and forget as we are acknowledging the lesson being learned. Forgetting is something that we see as not validating the event, and that is the opposite of what this is about. Forgive and let go, and let every memory be a part of your embraced and loved journey. Any event, perceived as good or bad, holds the opportunity for growth and learning. 3

4 You are always ready to forgive - it is not such a big deal really. It is the energy of letting love back into your heart. Forgiveness is not about covering wounds, that is called suppressing them. No, on the contrary, you are on your way to healing all wounds. No bandage needed. The power of choice is the energy that we use to start the forgiveness process. Choose to do it, and find a way to set yourself free. Your health depends on it. Although most people will act according to the best of their ability the act often comes from their own fear and hurts. All of us, the seemingly good, bad and ugly all of us are doing what we believe is the best we can do at the time. Even though we have the obvious right to feel resentment and anger, we also have the ability to make the choice not to. Now we are refusing to play the victim and we are no longer letting another person hold any power over us or our feelings. Once we give away that power we have lost the control of our health. Reclaim it now by doing some healing forgiveness-work. Acceptance of life as it is holds a great key to this inner work of healing. Let go of the why me and the but it was not fair. It happened, and it does not have to be fair to be forgiven. Again, this is not about the act or the other person, nor is it about validating or justifying. This is solely about you loving yourself enough to not let any past event stop you from living the life that you deserve. Accept and acknowledge everything about it, about the person and the event. This will make you acknowledge that it actually needs to be forgiven. Accepting is not the same as denying, it is taking ownership and responsibility for our own health and life. You are simply calling forth what is not of you, or your business to carry around. Keys to letting go through forgiveness: Commit to moving on Be willing to let it all go Accept that it happened Be patient Be in the present moment Love yourself Self-love is the catalyst of compassion, gratitude and forgiveness. We all need to look within, and forgive ourselves first. By the simple act of loving ourselves, we are opening the floodgate for the compassion that is needed for forgiveness. You did your best with what you had at the moment, although looking back you might have chosen to do things differently. We all know that one, you are not alone it is called life. It s the same learning path for all of us. Love yourself by forgiving yourself for everything, right now. 4

5 Holding on to any kind of resentment has consequences for our health, and it is never worth it. Increased inner peace, happiness and calmness is what every cell in our body will experience once we allow ourselves to move on and beyond. Set some time to be with your inner emotions, and let any person that will need your forgiveness come forth. Find a pen and paper, and write down any situation or person that you feel have hurt you or done you wrong in any way at all. Look at each situation and feel it in your heart if you have forgiven them. If not, here are a few exercises that will help you during this process. Cutting the cord exercise: Sit or lay down in a comfortable position where you know that you will not be disturbed. Look at your notes and decide who you want to forgive. You can repeat this exercise as many times as you like until you have forgiven them all. You do not have to do this all at once, so start slow. It is perfectly okay to do the process on one person at the time. Some situations are harder than others to let go of. We are not focusing on the situations but the person in this exercise. When you are ready, close your eyes and relax your entire body. 1. Take a deep breath while you count to four. Hold it for four, and release on the count of four. Repeat four times. 2. With your inner eye, visualize the person you want to forgive. You are standing right in front of him or her. 3. Once you look closer, you will see that you are connected by cords/wires that bind you together. They run from stomach to stomach, heart to heart, head to head and so on. 4. The cords might be thick or thin, made of steel or hemp. They might be short or long, many or few. Take a good look. 5. Now you are going to cut those cords. Watch them being cut. Some might give in easily, but some might need some more help. I have seen cords that are of metal and will need some extensive work to cut through. If you hit a cord that seemingly doesn t give in, don t worry about it. You will get it next time. Most of the time, they cave easily. 6. When the cords are cut, look the person in the eye and say with your inner voice; I forgive you, as I forgive myself. I let you go in love and I wish you well. 7. See a white light opening over the now forgiven person and watch him or her be embraced by this light. Let them go and watch them dissolve into the light. 5

6 8. You have set yourself free and do no longer have any attachment to them. Repeat until you see no more cords between you and those you have chosen to let go of. Setting the stage for a healing and beyond: This is a different exercise that you can work with. Find a comfortable position and sit in a chair or lay down on a bed. Make sure that you will not be disturbed, and that you have a door or a window open for fresh air to be able to enter. 1. Take a deep breath while you count to four. Hold it for four, and release on the count of four. Repeat four times. 2. Visualize with your inner eye that you are sitting in a theater. You are the only audience, and the person you want to forgive is alone on stage. 3. This person has a story to tell you. He or she is telling you how sorry they are, while you are listening with compassion. They are showing remorse and regret, and asking for your forgiveness. You go up on stage and you give them a hug. You realize that it is all ok, that you can grant them their wish. 4. See the person happy and free, leaving the stage in joy. 5. If there is another story to be heard, go back to your seat and invite the next person on stage. The ultimate letting go exercise: Find a piece of paper to write on. It needs to be a nice piece, as the writing on it will be important. Do not write this on the computer to print, as your handwriting is important. 1. Sit down in a quiet place and write down everything you can think about that would need to be forgiven. It can be situations or people. It can be your own doings or those of others. Do not stop until you have gotten everything. It does not matter how many pages you write, the more the merrier. 2. If you do not feel like you are done with the list, let it be for a few hours or a day, then get back to it and add what you need to add. 3. When the list is complete, including everything you can think of and remember that has done you wrong, felt wrong or abusive, fold it together and bring it outside. 4. If you can t go outside, find a bucket and go somewhere where you can safely burn your piece of paper. You want it to turn to ashes, together with every hurt and harmful action that is written on it. It can no longer hurt you, as it is given back to the energy of all that is. 6

7 5. You have let it all go, and can start filling your heart with even more pure love for life. The greatest act of forgiveness is that of forgiving ourselves. Often we carry around a self-blame that is in the way of our true happiness. You need to forgive yourself for everything, so use this exercise to free yourself. Take some time to focus on you alone, and go deep within and listen. Write it all down, and set the attention. This is the time for you to rise from the ashes, so dig deep and be proud of yourself. Everything we are carrying with us from the past is creating our present moment. Let go and let live! 7

AFFIRMATIONS. Viviana Geurten. A Guide to Create the Life You Desire

AFFIRMATIONS. Viviana Geurten. A Guide to Create the Life You Desire AFFIRMATIONS Viviana Geurten A Guide to Create the Life You Desire "Your thoughts and beliefs of the past have created this moment, and all the moments up to this moment. What you are now choosing to believe