Ranger's Birthday..My child was born with Down Syndrome Sunday, 16 January :43 - Last Updated Sunday, 16 January :45

Transcription

1 I knew I was getting close to having my baby. I could feel it. The morning of, I was really quite cranky. I had sick kids, I was begging my body to keep this baby in until the kids were better. I got out of bed, dyed my hair, and gave myself a mini pedicure. I wasn't feeling quite up to par so I layed back down for about an hour. I got up and decided I better go get some groceries. Jordan (my 8 yr old who is 9 now) and I went to the local store and I bought everything in packages and microwavable. I never shop that way. Then as we were leaving the store, I payed the power bill at the front counter, and out to the truck we go. Walking to the truck with a cart load of packaged easy food, I felt a pop and warm water was running down my legs. I turned to Jordan and said, are my pants getting wet? He said, YES. LET'S GO MOM!! I called my boyfriend, Frank on the way home and said get ready, MY WATER BROKE!! We were so excited for this day. We couldn't wait to meet our baby boy. I got to the hospital and I labored for 3 hours and a couple of pushes later my, baby boy...ranger Sonny...was born. The doctor placed my sweet baby on my tummy and he 1 / 7

2 was looking straight into my eyes. I was looking right back and I seen it! One of the first things I said, " Why are his eye's slanted? " Nobody said anything. There was alot going on so I didn't dwell on it. I didn't care anyway, I thought he was a cute little guy. The nurses and doctors did not say anything about it until later that night. The Doctor came in my hospital room and said, " I need to talk to you and Frank". Well Frank had just walked out of the room to take a well needed break. So I called him on his cell and asked him to come back. In the mean time, I knew deep down what the doctor was going to tell us. The doctor went back out into the nurses area to wait until Frank came back. The nurse was still in my room cleaning up. I begged her to tell me what the doctor wanted to talk to us about, I begged and begged. I said to her, I know something is not quite right with my baby. She kept saying just wait for the doctor. I cried to her and said "He has Down 2 / 7

3 Syndrome doesn't he?" She said "yes!" She asked me not to say that she told me. I promised I wouldn't, and I didn't. I'm not sure how I knew, but I did. The Doctor came in and told us he suspected our new baby boy has Down syndrome. My heart literally sank, even though I already knew, I felt like the doctor confirmed it. I started to cry. I asked him how did this happen? Was is because I was horribly sick for most of my pregnancy? Why, why, why? I had so many thoughts and emotions running through my head, wondering what I had done to make my baby have Down Syndrome. But then it hit me that this is my flesh and blood, none of that stuff mattered. I remember saying " I will love him anyway, I don't care". 3 / 7

4 back. was the something depends wrong. accepting would Needless room boy and alot wonderful, most make caring Thankfully Syndrome. hospital disappointing. forest'. The Down a heart, latching good draining. the Pediatric through family, finally first My doctor who why nurse of Doctor the powerful hands." for But her Syndrome. but be questions. spirit. You His 5th time. doctor's had on. did him. was I living. strong, I they the decided nurse. was came like her Cardio Dad told baby I something ordered just needed brought you, But say, was God nothing suppose This fact All prayer, have and very this us picked don't There we alone and I business trying I'm you Everything of It didn't of Doctor heartbroken, not is I are was finally lots to devastated caused these cried this my having so on just waited check know I with talk. like so will glad has Down computer of the hardly to just out. say be some together. confusing. name mastered if this. tests, my I me, never what same Seattle no a *perfect*. something needed I 9 she came anything I told my special months love Syndrome. baby the sleep problems and of I can many 'Ranger' thought. heart was needed hands ever nurse anyone. the to baby back his She feel distraught. handle traveling that support. that Here needs kind I emotions. to problems forget. name. couldn't first wrong knelt that good my hospital after duty see our so night. Meaning think. My words any this 7 thoughts. far. child. my confirmed I family. the The down to days your " that alot (he first It with I kind 'God'. Frank figure fits children's little am know are You I Also little with she still feelings knew of night. And call brand of pamphlets, beside or him. I very local a of work. knew will birth. said fella didn't baby Ranger You me. big out you I friends was information not my cried I What I thankful already new never hospital. will asleep thing you why, I and know sent He my being he suspicions. boy. to started have that never was did my baby had until is hospital get does books..etc. your understand why this I It still loved sure held a prayer. Mom, I my means when it. having do We researching I name..lol) was that children forget told the have this could nursing sent sister And what my did blood him, bed She then very couch needs your deserve something happened She 'warden to 2 a this sweet I have her get. That didn't holes and hard kind unless went was it Julie, that emotionally and test the told is and was child kind you, The Down said to awas baby of time have with this, rest my in come feel of I to go just you life asked and to his the very see so of me ithe We to play. took They Ranger and didn't explained home care. Ranger what second it is. day They their after asked little birth. brother. a few I told questions, the other held kids him, that then has they Down went I down. so attacks, and couldn't plain But sweet slower know months look myself blessed when can't cruel. as Frank. had that's he baby. say I time in disabled cried old I to figure sent I grieved everything doing some didn't be I and went selfish..lol). thought And and Ranger given it really things he people know out. oh on, for cried. such soooo back to I the a to has bad grew kept if but joy do and I He me. I the didn't a would been to thoughts with I cute. precious thinking, is to really have loss my very ACCEPT know these peachy, be He life. of a don't *perfect* heart. tests and is gift good He sweet, typical just I I my care. had about bad could from has and I like never mother child known, days. kind to changed child, That ultrasounds God. 4 raise any me. days just used hearted means to other I He I a had a could after me. really to, disabled a way kid. my he people. I and I lot never look have was gets knew *perfect*. He he of wondered anger child. is. might at home, been cared. to I what have life He in I at prepared. differently. be this my I Now had he I to why the am a sweet, baby say, was world, little panic he Doctor, involving a they break is doing I longer bit I am 14 very just I that now truly God is(i 4 / 7

5 I have completely grieve. *I wrote have learned this You also normal. little need learned through story it We that get out in are I hopes on this did human with nothing process, of your helping and to journey. have that cause someone it feelings. is Down okay else Syndrome, to All grieve. that I can may say All it be is just the to going things happens.* let yourself through I felt isthis. I < 5 / 7

6 6 / 7

7 7 / 7