Your Very Best Friend
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1 Your Very Best Friend Discovering The One Uniquely Qualified To Be A Woman s Very Best Friend A 5-Day Mini Bible Study, by Dianne Thornton
2 2017 by Dianne Thornton All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. This publication is for your personal enjoyment and use only, and may not be resold or given away. If you would like to share this with someone, please direct your friends to, where they may obtain a copy for free. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007, 2013, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois All rights reserved. Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Bible (NASB), Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation Used by permission. Scripture quotations from the ESV Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version ), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
3 Introduction A best friend is one of life s treasured gifts. For women, especially so. If we are blessed, we may have several to walk with us through life. As children, we tend to gravitate toward our one best friend. But as we mature, we realize there isn t just one person who can meet every need we have. For wives, not even our husbands can do that. Hopefully, we are blessed with a variety of friendships. Friends we work with, friends we exercise with, PTA friends, church friends, and neighbors. There are times, however, when friends are not available or, they are altogether absent. Thankfully, we serve a God who can and does meet the needs of women completely. For the next five days, we ll take a look at different ways God meets these needs. He is uniquely qualified to be your Best Friend in every way. The following Scriptures are the foundation for my writing ministry. They fuel my love for God and His Word. and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him! (Psalm 34:8) How sweet your words taste to me; they are sweeter than honey. (Psalm 119:103) Reverence for the Lord is pure, lasting forever. The laws of the Lord are true; each one is fair. They are more desirable than gold, even the finest gold. They are sweeter than honey, even honey dripping from the comb. (Psalm 19:9-10) I pray that as you dig into God s Word, you ll discover their truths, as well. I ve broken each day into sections. First, we taste and savor God s Word by reading and meditating on it. Considering what it means. See that the Lord is Good Then, we see, or understand. What did we learn about God? How does this passage show us that God is good?
4 Day One God knows our hearts and understands us completely. Women desire to be known and understood. I can t count the number of times I ve been in a complicated conversation with my husband, and he just didn t get it. I described the situation in a number of ways and still, he didn t understand. There are times when my women friends (even my sisters) don t understand my situation or my heart about something important to me. After explaining things in detail, they dispense their thoughtful counsel, but it s clear they don t get it either. They are unable to give me the help I need. In these cases, I find myself desperate for someone to truly understand! I ve been on the other side of the conversation, too. A good friend shares her heart and is frustrated because it seems that no one understands. That s what we need. Someone who will listen to our story with interest, and then understand exactly what we re going through. The good news is, God knows our hearts, and He understands us completely. You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. (Psalm 139:13-15) For we are God s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10) In these verses, what words are used to describe God s artistry?
5 Those are powerful words. Delicate. Complex. Workmanship. Marvelous. Masterpiece. When I think about them relative to artwork, I think of the paintings and carvings created by old masters. You your person was created by the Master of all creation. Long before we were born, God designed you. He planned how you would look, how you would sound. He gave you your personality, along with unique gifts and abilities. He did it all in secret. He didn t let anyone else in on His creation until the moment of your birth. From that point forward, you are a continual reveal of all God did and is doing in your life. He has a plan and a purpose for every delicate, complex aspect of your life. You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. (Psalm 56:8) I will answer them before they even call to me. While they are still talking about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers! (Isaiah 65:24) O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. (Psalm 139:1-4) I love the New American Standard translation of verse 3. You are intimately acquainted with all my ways. (Psalm 139:3, NASB) List the ways that God is intimately acquainted with us.
6 God knows everything about us. He even knows what we are going to say before we say it. And because He knows our hearts, He knows what s behind those words. He gets us! Such knowledge [about me and our relationship] is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! (Psalm 139:6) God knows us better than we know ourselves. In fact, His knowledge of us is beyond our own understanding. He made us! The Creator knows His creation. One of my daughters is a talented, young artist. She never lets me see something she s working on until she is finished. I m always impressed with her work and attention to detail. When I compliment her, however, she is quick to point out errors in her artistry. Of course I don t see them; but because she is the artist, she is acutely aware of her work. God is the same way except He never makes mistakes! He knows His craftsmanship inside and out. See that the Lord is Good Even though our earthly friends try and miss, God knows our hearts and understands us completely. He gets us. Journal what this means to you. Spend some time with your Best Friend. Even though He already knows, journal all that is on your heart.
7 Day Two God is with us all the time. No matter how independent we may be, we were not designed to live life in isolation. Even for the introvert (and the now popular ambivert one who is a balance between an introvert and an extrovert), God made us to grow in relationship with others. But sometimes people aren t around. Sometimes we are physically alone and our hearts yearn for the presence of the people we love. Other times, we want to run away from everyone and just be alone. But we are never separated from the Presence of God. We cannot hide from Him. No matter where we go, God is there. Look up the following verses and list the different ways God tells us that He is always with us. Exodus 33:14 Joshua 1:9 Psalm 23:4 Psalm 139:7-8 Isaiah 41:10 Isaiah 43:2 Jeremiah 1:19 Matthew 28:20 Hebrews 13:5 This is the Promise God gave the Israelites long ago. All right then, the Lord himself will give you the sign. Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son and will call him Immanuel (which means God is with us ). (Isaiah 7:14)
8 It is the same Promise Jesus gave His disciples when He told them He would be going away. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn t looking for him and doesn t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. (John 14:16-17) What was God s plan for the disciples? Jesus told His disciples He would not leave them alone. He would send the Holy Spirit to help them, walk with them, and live in them, forever. We, too, have the Holy Spirit. When we give our lives to Christ, the Holy Spirit takes up residence inside of us. It is not just God with us. It is God in us (1 Corinthians 3:16)! Come close to God, and God will come close to you. (James 4:8) If our schedules are too busy and we haven t made time for God, we may not sense His Presence. That doesn t change the fact that He is with us and in us. What are some ways that we can come close to God? Sin (I hate that word, don t you?) can also be the reason we don t sense God s Presence. Come and listen, all you who fear God, and I will tell you what he did for me. For I cried out to him for help, praising him as I spoke. If I had not confessed the sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened. But God did listen! He paid attention to my prayer. Praise God, who did not ignore my prayer or withdraw his unfailing love from me. (Psalm 66:16-20)
9 What is God s plan for restoring our relationship with Him? See that the Lord is Good God is with us all the time. When friends with skin on aren t available, God is. All we have to do is draw near to Him. Through His Word, prayer, worship. Maybe a walk through a pretty park. When we draw near to Him, we can count on His great promise to draw near to us. Journal what it means to you that God is present when you are longing for the Presence of your Best Friend.
10 Day Three God s power is available for all our needs. Life gets messy. Sometimes it feels like everything is spinning out of control. We do our best to stop the chaos, but fail. We find ourselves at the end of ourselves, with nothing left to give. There is nothing materially that we can do to change or repair our circumstances. Sometimes life seems to be in order except for that one issue. It might be as simple as needing a babysitter. (For young moms, often this is not a simple issue!) The working woman may be running against a deadline on a project for work, and things just aren t coming together. We need help. Whether great or small, God is present and ready to meet our needs. O Sovereign LORD! You made the heavens and earth by your strong hand and powerful arm. Nothing is too hard for you! (Jeremiah 32:17) The Lord made the earth by his power, and he preserves it by his wisdom. With his own understanding he stretched out the heavens. (Jeremiah 51:15) What do these verses tell us about God s power? Don t be afraid, for I am with you. Don t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)
11 What else do we learn about God s power in this verse? When we are overwhelmed with life and emotionally empty, when suffering weakens us, God is at work. Sometimes that is what it takes for us to be still and look for God in the middle of our circumstances. God is powerful enough to do anything. He can totally change our circumstances if He wants to and if it suits His purposes. More often than not, however, God walks with us through our difficulties, strengthening us so we can endure them. Each time he said, My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness. So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) What is one reason that God may allow us to experience suffering and weakness? God loves to show Himself strong in our lives. It is His specialty! When we depend on God s grace and strength, the world takes note. Our faith grows strong as we continue to trust God in overwhelming circumstances. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. (1 Peter 1:7)
12 What is God s desired result when we experience trials and suffering? Struggles refine our faith. God is glorified in our lives as people observe our growing faith. See that the Lord is Good The Lord stands ready to meet our needs, no matter what they are. When we are weak, He steps in and strengthens us for the tasks at hand. Spend some time journaling how God has met you in your weakness and helped you endure difficulty. If you re in the midst of difficulty right now, tell your Best Friend about it. Don t leave anything out. Draw near to Him. As you depend on His strength, a watching world will see your faith grow, and God will be glorified!
13 Day Four God loves us faithfully and unconditionally. Most importantly, women need to know they are fully loved deeply, tenderly, faithfully, and unconditionally. Most of us have experienced the pain of betrayal. For whatever reason, the one we loved left. Leaving a hole in our hearts. God s love is not like that. His love is faithful forever. Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. (1 John 4:18) How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! (Psalm 139:17-18) What do we learn about God s love from these verses? There is no fear in this kind of love. Instead, this love gives freedom, security, and confidence to the beloved. We don t have to do anything to win God s love. We have it! He loves us better than anyone else can. You could even say that God is crazy in love with us. We are on His mind all the time! Let s see what else we can find! Look up the following verses. Next to each one, write down what you learn about God s crazy love for you!
14 Psalm 56:8 Psalm 147:3 Isaiah 40:11 Isaiah 49:16 Zephaniah 3:17 2 Timothy 2:13 I love Psalm 56:8. To make sure you catch all that s there, I m including it in several translations. You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. (NLT) You Yourself have recorded my wanderings. Put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your records? (HCSB) You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? (ESV) The Lord knows how many hairs are on our heads (including the ones left in our hairbrushes). He keeps track of our restless tossing during the night, and He stores our tears in a bottle. But wait! There s more! Psalm 86:15 Psalm 103:8 Psalm 107:8-9 Psalm 118:6 Isaiah 43:1-5 Jeremiah 31:3 Romans 5:8 Romans 8:31
15 What kind of love is this? As precious as my husband is, even his love doesn t compare to God s love for me. This is the kind of love I want to live in! This is the love God offers to each of us. See that the Lord is Good We ve looked at a lot of Scripture today. I m going to leave you with one more, and it s my prayer for you today. After reading this, journal all that is on your heart. I pray that you [may] have the power to understand, as all God s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. (Ephesians 3:18-19)
16 Day Five We must cultivate this relationship. We arrange our schedules, shifting around important things, to make room for what we love a significant other, hobbies, or sports. We even shift our schedules for things we may not love, for things that are important to us like our health. We may not love exercise, but we know that if we are going to live long, healthy lives, our bodies require it. Cultivating our relationship with God requires the same commitment. As with any relationship we want to deepen, growth happens when we spend time together. We spend time with God in many ways. Reading your Bible is the best way to know God as He is revealed on every page. And since God is with us (remember, the Holy spirit lives inside of us!), He helps us understand what we re reading (John14:26). Sometimes the Bible refers to itself as the law of the Lord, as it contains instructions for right living. Oh, the joys of those who delight in the law of the Lord, meditating on it day and night. They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do. (Psalm 1:1-3) Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do. (Joshua 1:8) All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work. (2 Timothy 3:16-17)
17 What is the result of reading the Bible on a regular basis? Another way that we deepen our relationship with God is through prayer. Prayer is simply talking with God. If you re new to prayer, it may seem intimidating. Or it may seem silly talking to someone you can t see. But there is no need to fear or feel awkward. God is there with you. Remember? He understands what s going on behind your words. He knows your heart. You are completely safe with Him. The more you pray, the more comfortable you are praying. After sending [the crowds] home, [Jesus] went up into the hills by himself to pray. Night fell while he was there alone. (Matthew 14:23) Before daybreak the next morning, Jesus got up and went out to an isolated place to pray. (Mark 1:35) But Jesus often withdrew to the wilderness for prayer. (Luke 5:16) What do we learn about prayer from Jesus example? Jesus prayed all the time. He prayed after spending time with crowds of people. He prayed early in the morning. He prayed in the evening. He got alone with God, and He prayed often. The more time we spend with God, the more we understand Him. The more we understand His ways. We learn more about His person, His presence, His power, His heart of understanding and His love for us. A few big, theological words describe these aspects of God s character that make Him our perfect, Best Friend. Omniscience tells us God knows and understands everything that is to be known even the deep secrets of our hearts.
18 Omnipresence means God is with us all the time. Even when we feel we are alone, we are not. Omnipotence means God has complete power over everything even our seemingly impossible situations. God can completely reverse our situations, bring answers to them, or steady our hearts in the midst of them. Agape is the word to describe God s unconditional faithful love. We need friends! We need friends we can call on in the middle of the night people who will drop everything to help us. But we also need The One Who knows us inside and out The One Who is with us all the time The One Who understands what no one else does The One Who with power to intervene and strengthen us so we can endure our circumstances The One who loves us with a deep, everlasting love See that the Lord is Good I don t know what your heart s deep needs are today, especially those things that no one else understands. But our omniscient God does. Because He loves you, He stands ready and eager to meet those needs. He can be your very Best Friend. I hope He is! Take some time to journal today. What is the most significant thing you learned this week? How will it change your life? Talk to your Best Friend about it.
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