Resilience and Courage in the Face of Adversity

Transcription

1 Resilience and Courage in the Face of Adversity Led by at the, MA, Unitarian Universalist My talk today is an invitation to join with me in discovering and exploring the meaning and direction our lives take when we are fully engaged by connection with others, when we choose to create in community and make the pilgrimage that so many choose, to shape and take responsibility for the world around them. Think about the experience and knowledge that often evolves in the human consciousness under oppressive conditions and in times of darkness and despair. Think about the capacity for human beings to persevere, to change, to co-create for the good and to care for each other. For me, these opportunities and possibilities raise questions about the human heart, the human spirit and the complex sometimes inexplicable resilience and courage we witness. I wonder about the human journey which is often a turbulent and sometimes chaotic act of transfiguration. The stories we know of others and perhaps our own stories suggest that we are far more than sufferers of an external and material world that increasingly invades all aspects of our lives. In fact we witness ample evidence of a vitality, an expression and mystery of inner life (perhaps what some might call a spiritual path), for each of us. This reality causes me to wonder how it is that some people can care so deeply about something that they work, against all odds and failures and disappointments, and persist to change things for the better. I also wonder how it is it that some people manage the condition of a broken heart and from grief and shadow emerge as leaders, risk takers, steadfast and dedicated in their resolve to do the right thing. Parker Palmer, teacher, writer, quaker elder, in his book A Hidden Wholeness says There are at least two ways to understand what it means to have our hearts broken. One is to imagine the heart broken into shards and scattered about a feeling most of us know, and a fate we would like to avoid. The other is to imagine the heart broken into new capacity a process that is not without pain but one that many of us would welcome." Palmer calls this the tragic gap the space between reality and possibility. The Chinese character for perseverance is a knife poised over the human heart. Is it true that people can learn from their own struggles and be inspired to seek to change the condition of the world they live in? The psychologist/poet Clarissa Pinkola Estes wrote: Ours is not the the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach. Any small calm thing that one soul can do for another soul, to assist some portion of this poor suffering world, will help immensely.

2 We are constantly inspired by stories of bravery, sacrifice and courage. We know the stories of those who endured during times of political upheaval and oppression. We know of so many people who have been survivors or children of survivors of genocide. We know of people who have suffered discrimination and violence. We know of people who live in extreme poverty and hunger, shamefully, all of this, in our own country. We may wish this was our past, but we know all too well that we face this and more in our world today. It is hard not to give up in the face of continuing cruelty, greed, indifference and political dysfunction. Yet there are always some persons who are called to action. There are the heroes and leaders we learn about throughout our lives. Their stories are part of our history. They inspire us and we are in awe of their accomplishments. Their names may be familiar to us. Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Ghandi, Vaclav Havel, Mother Theresa, Elie Wiesel, Cesar Chavez,Rosa Parks, and so many others. We know about them because, in spite of injustices and atrocities committed against them and their families and their neighbors, they persevered. We know about them because they were leaders who even in the midst of failures, exhaustion, imprisonment and despair sustained themselves and remained devoted to their cause. Nelson Mandela said: Do not judge me by my success; judge me by the number of times I fell down and got back up. But the resiliency and courage that intrigues and inspires me is not just these most worthy persons but also the people I have encountered in my own life who might well have been embittered and trapped by their circumstances but despite unimaginable hurdles they persevered. Among these persons are students I have known through my work at Northern Essex Community College, young adults I worked with at United Cerebral Palsy, my friends, family, colleagues, neighbors, members of the community. So I ask: how is it that some people can t get out of it, so they get into it? How do they stay the course and focus on becoming steadfast in their resolve to make a difference. How do they sustain themselves while at the same time support and inspire others around them? How do people who seem to have lost almost everything step forward to mend what is within their reach? And why is it that some people who would seem to have everything necessary to live a comfortable and secure life choose to dedicate their lives to causes they care deeply about? In Meg Wheatley s book Turning to One Another she writes: Because a leader is anyone willing to help, we can celebrate the fact that the world is abundantly rich in leaders. Some people ask where have all the leaders gone.? But if we worry that there is a shortage of leaders, we are just looking in the wrong place, usually at the top of some hierarchy. Instead, we need to look around us, to look locally. And we need to look at ourselves. When have we moved into action for an issue or concern or a person we cared about? When have we said yes. When have we taken the time to really see the people before

3 us... to truly listen without an agenda...to simply be completely present to another human being.. to be without judgement or the need to fix or advise. Recently I watched a video of British anthropologist Jane Goodall. In the video she and a colleague are releasing a rescued chimp that was shot and near starvation. He was named Wounda meaning near death. After the chimp was nursed back to health Goodall and colleagues accompanied the animal on its journey to a chimp sanctuary. The chimp emerged from the cage and took his time looking around. Jane and her colleagues waited patiently with the chimp for hours, making those body scratching movements that emulate chimp behavior. Finally when the chimp was ready to go he moved over to Jane and lovingly hugged her and then moved off into the jungle. This is a woman who has dedicated her life to the conservation of endangered species and animal welfare and still at the age of 80 brings the attention of the world to the unfolding tragedy of the demise of certain species on our planet. I am reminded of the contradiction in our own species. How is it that we humans are capable of the worst atrocities, abuse, destruction of other people, animals, our environment, while at the same time we are capable of such generosity, love, compassion, kindness and the creation of beauty. Each of us has a story or has witnessed a story of pain, endurance, grief and loss. We may witness our personal history if we are willing to take that inner journey. If we let others into our lives we may have the honor of being a witness to other people's lives and vulnerability. Pema Chodron Buddist Teacher said : How did I get so lucky to have my heart awakened to others and their suffering? So, what is that place in us that grounds us and awakens us to new space for purpose and intention? Why is it that bitterness might not necessarily incapacitate us or make us turn away from intimacy? Why do we choose not to turn away from others? Why might we not be driven by our anger or indifference? How is it that in a world that increasingly views human beings as mindless consumers from the moment of birth some people resist that damaging prospect? What is the force that infuses some people with the capacity for action, for movement, for fearlessness? What do we name it? What do we call it when people become spiritual warriors? When and how do we choose bravery and choose to bear witness? How do we become conscious and contributing participants in this world we live in? How easy it is to be discouraged by all of the horrors, madness and devastation we see and know about often within minutes of its occurrence. With all of our brilliance, technology, knowledge, education, wealth, and experience, how can it be that there is so much suffering, loneliness, indifference, sickness, poverty, aggression, fear and hatred in our world? But then we notice who is not turning away in despair. The question is, who will aspire to service, bravery, generosity and clarity. Who will despite the inclination to throw up our hands and disappear into our own safe life (should we be fortunate enough to have that) convert that dark energy of destruction and despair into shaping, influencing and healing our communities, our organizations, our families, our world? Who will bear witness to the suffering or mistreatment of others and freely offer their skills, their gifts, their companionship, their time and their love?

4 Malala Yousafzai, the Pakistani teenager shot in the head by the Taliban for campaigning for girls education spoke these words on her sixteenth birthday: the terrorists thought they would change my aims and stop my ambitions, but nothing changed in my life except this... weakness, fear and hopelessness died, strength, power and courage was born. In fact many people respond with generosity and accountability that creates models of the future they wish to create.this happens all of the time, everyday, everywhere in the world in our own communities and in our neighborhoods; and, if we are fortunate enough, in our homes and within our families. We are surrounded by the willingness of people to open their hearts, give of their time, be a friend, lean into community and speak out against injustice. Indeed it happens if we just slow down and notice and participate. When we think about the busy, sometimes frantic lives we lead, we must also think about the price we pay not to notice other human beings. Not to see people. Not to hear people. Not to listen. Everyone in this room can tell a story about this kind of fearlessness, caring and action. Very possibly and likely some of your own actions. At NECC I met students who were living in their cars but came to class every day. I knew single moms who balanced child care, work, and school while toggling between between two languages and cultures. When I worked at United Cerebral Palsy I knew adults who struggled with every step, every word, every morsel of food they ate.to this day I remember them as some of the bravest and most determined people I have ever known. It was a life lesson for me, about all that I took for granted. Some years ago I organized a speaker series on Genocide. This gave me the opportunity to meet and get to know Sonia Weitz, a holocaust survivor, a poet, an educator and a human rights activist. She was born in Poland, survived the Krakow ghetto and five Nazi camps including Auschwitz. She was founder and director of the Holocaust Center of the North Shore and a presidential appointee of the US Holocaust Memorial museum Council. She was the author of a book of poems entitled I promised I Would Tell. I was nervous the first time I met her. I am not sure what I expected but when she entered the room I saw a small but powerful woman in her eighties. Her dark hair was pulled back in a bun and she was very beautiful. You could feel her energy, her kindness and her strength. A hush fell over the room as she began to read her poems. During a break at the reading, I found myself in the hallway with a young student who asked me shyly if I had a moment. I said I did. She asked me if the tattoo on Sonia s arm was real? I said it was. She said I ve seen that in the movies but I didn t know they really did that, or any of this to people." I said, Sadly, they did." Sonia died on June 23rd Her message was clear. Don t be a by-stander... get involved... be committed to social justice. There are people in this room who are dedicating their efforts and skills and passions to causes because they want to take responsibility for what they care about. Thomas Merton, Catholic monk and activist, said: Do not depend on the hope of results...in the end, it is the reality of personal relationship that saves everything.

5 Maggie Budzyna is 13 years old and lives in Newburyport. She is the daughter of a friend of mine.she is a student at Berwick Academy and she has been an actress since the age of 4. While in a rehearsal in Lawrence for Annie a few years ago she learned that there were few affordable opportunities for Lawrence kids to study acting. She decided to do something about it. She teamed up with Howard Sticklor (founder of YDO) who brought in the kids (grades 3-12) and supported her plan to work with them to create a production. Maggie directs, produces, organizes volunteers, and fundraises to support this free program. This year she raised $10,000 to produce The Wizard of Oz. Many of her cast members will be brand new to acting. Having seen past shows, I know it will be fabulous. You will not want to miss it. How is it that a happy, busy 13-year-old girl who has a pretty amazing life would decide to take on this enormous initiative and succeed in creating a life-changing experience for about 60 kids every year. If you ask her, and I did, she says I loved acting and I was fortunate. I had so many opportunities to learn about performing. Why wouldn t I want that for others who might not have the opportunities I had. Keep in mind she was 11 when she began this program. So, is it the case that this human capacity for change and for giving of oneself, for caring and creativity, comes from our very own personal journeys? Might it be that the contradictions, the confusion, the unfamiliar, the discomfort and paradoxes in our lives can lead us to resilience and change? Is this quality nurtured and born from our invitation and need to join with others? Have we discovered that fragmentation in our organizations, our schools, our businesses, our health care, or communities more often than not isolates us rather than bring us together? Dorothy Day: The Catholic Worker We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community." Finally I would like to end with a story from my own Jewish tradition. It is an old Hasidic tale. The pupil comes to the rebbe and asks, Why does the Torah tell us to place these words upon your hearts? Why does it not tell us to place these words in our hearts? The rebbe answers, It is because as we are, our hearts are closed, and we cannot place the words in our hearts. So we place them on top of our hearts. And there they stay until, one day, the heart breaks, and the words fall in.